Funny Urdu Sms
Teri aankain jhuki jhuki
tera chehra khila khila
jab tere chehre per haath ghumaya
to aadha kilo fair & lovely mila
TUSI bade hi gr8 ho,
RASGULLE ki pl8 ho,
PEPSI ka cr8 ho,
ANDE ka oml8 ho,
SMS KARNE ME bare le8 ho,
JALEBI ki tarah stra8 ho,
KHER jo bhi ho mere fevr8 ho...!
Mandir mein jaap karta hoon,
Masjid mein adaab karta hoon,
Insaan se kahin bhagwan na ban jaun
isliye roz tujhko SMS karke paap karta hoon
Child : - Mohit uncle mujhe na Bandar dekhna hai
Mohit : - Beta vo abhi SMS padh raha hai.
Zindagi jaise ek saza si ho gayi hai,
gamm ke saagar me is kadar kho gayi hai,
tum kar do ek SMS yeh guzarish hai meri,
tumari SMS ki adat si ho gayi hai.
Jis mehfil mein hum khade ho jaaye
waha Haritik bhi jhukta hai
Kaho Na Pyaar Hai
Kya mooh dukhta hai
Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya
Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya
Ki Paaglo ke stock mein Naya Maal Aaya
Kaun sa gham hai jo yeh haal bana rakha hai
na to makeup hai, na baalon ko sajaa rakha hai
aur khama-kha cherti rehti hai yeh rukhsaaron ko
Tum ne zulfon ko bohut sar pe chara rakha hai
Jis din se juda vo humse hue
is dil ne dharkna chor diya
hai chaand ka mooh bhi utra utra
taaro ne chamkna chor diya
Kon kehta hai dost ki tumse humari judaai hogi
yeh afwaah zaroor kissi dushman ne uraayi hogi
shaan se rahenge tumahre dil mein hum
itne dino mein kuch to jagah banayi hogi
Vo likhte hain humara naam mitti mein
aur mita dete hain, Unke liye ye khel hoga
magar hume to vo mitti mein mila dete hain...
Umeedo ki manzil toot gayi
aankho se ashqo ki dhara beh gayi
are tumahri bhi kya izaat reh gayi
jab class ki ladki bhaiya keh gayi
Kabhi honsla bhi aazmaana chahiye
bure waqt mein muskurana chahiye
jab 10 dino mein khujli na mite
to 11 ve din nahana chahiye
Arz kiya hai.....
Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai
wah wah! wah wah!
Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai
khafa ho humse ya balance kam hai?
ha ha ha ha.....
Tammana se nahi tanhai se darte hain
pyaar se nahi ruswaai se darte hain
milne ki to bohat chahat hai
par milne ke baad judaai se darte hain
Dil torna humari aadat nahi
Dil hum kissi ka dukhate nahi
Bharosa rakhna meri wafaon pe
Dil mein bas kar hum kissi ko bhulate nahi
You r my sweet SONA
I don't want u KHONA
I want a place in your heart's KONA
Otherwise i will start RONA
Atleast Good Morning to kar LONA
Jab i ne U se pyaar kiya
to night ko sleeping chor diya
tere face ki gentle beauty ne
mere kind heart ko phor diya
Yaad mein teri aankhe bharta hai koi,
har saans ke saath tujhe yaad karta hai koi,
maut to sachai hai aani hai,
lekin teri judaai mein har roz marta hai koi....!
Safed rang ho agar mehboob ka ,
toh mohabbat ki detergent khusbudar nazar aati hai,
na koi aur hota kharid-dar SURF-EXCEL KA,
aur na dhulai RIN-SUPREME ki kam nazar aati hai...!!!
jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye
aur husn ke tewar nukile ho gaye
hum izhaar karne me thode dhiile ho gaye
aur unke haath peele ho gaye
Is Dil mein aansuyo ke mele hain
Tum bin hum bohat akele hain
Sab kuch chor kar tumeh e-mail karte hain
Dekho hum kitne vele hain
* vele = lazy (vele is a Punjabi word)
Har des ki ek sarhadd hoti hai
bache ki bhi ek zidd hote hai
aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka
Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai
Promise me we are true friends
I am lamp you are light
I am Coke you are Sprite
I am Sawan you are badal
I am Normal you are Pagal
I am Water you are Tanki
I am Tarzan you are Monkey
kayi raaz aise hote hain jo dikhaye nahi jaate
kayi kisse aise hote hain jo sunaye nahi jaate
kayi dil aise hote hain jo tode nahi jaate
aur kuch aap jaise dost aise hote hain jo chore nahi jaate.
Mere Dil, Jiger, Kidney, Liver ho tum
waqt-bewaqt aaye vo fever ho tum
Doob kar jisme marr jayu vo River ho tum
Mere jeevan mein ab to forever ho tum...
Shaam hote hii ye Dil udaas hota hai
Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai
Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai
Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..
Kya aankheiN hain aapki, kya baatein hain aapki..
us khuda ne kuch aisa aapko bnaya hai...
maano..."Shhhsss...KOI Hai" se bhoot nikal aaya hai....
Aap kya jaano hum kitna yaad karte hain
maano ya na maano har pal fariyaad karte hain
Roz khat likhte hain CARTOON NETWORK ko
aur aapko play karne ki maang karte hain....
waaaaahhhhhhhhh...
Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi
liya paper aur tasveer aapki bnayi
socha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
magar vo to bacho ko draane ke kaam aayi...
Bari asaani se dil lagaye jaate hain
par badi mushkil se waade nibhaye jaate hain
le jaati hai mohabbat un raaho par
jaha diye nahi dil jlaaye jaate hain
Aap jaise log hume kuch khas lagte hai.
mann me har waqt hum ek aas rakte hai,
jaane kab aa jaye sms aapka
is liye cell ko dil ke pass rakte hai
Muskura do zara khuda ke vaste,
sama-e-mahefil mai roshni kam hai,
tum hamare nahi to kya ghum hai,
hum tumhare to haiN ye kya kam hai?
Tere pyaar ki roshni aisi hai ki
har taraf ujaala nazar aata hai
sochta hu ki ghar ki bijli katwa du
kambaqt bill bohat aata hai
jawaab teri shayari ka....
denge hum shayari mein....
naam tera likh baithe hain....
apne dil ki diary mein....
Tum hoti to aisa hota, tum hoti to waisa hota
Tum is baat pe itna hasti, tum uss baat pe itna khush hoti,
Tum is baat pe ye kehti,tum uss baat pe wo kahati
shukar hai tum nahi ho!!!
Yeh jo haseeno ke baal hote hai,
larkon ko phassane ke jaal hote hai,
na jaane kitno ke khoon piye honge inhone,
tabhi to inke honth laal hote hai
Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aur humare dil se awaaz nikalii....
Fiteh Mooh...Tusin Ethe vii aa gaye !!!
Hi Musharraf needs 500 donkeys to attack on India. 499 ja chuke, message milte hi niklo...
Jaate hue kuch aisa kar ke jayo kaam
ki har galli se awaaz aaye..."ABBA JAAN"..." ABBA JAAN"
Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Yeh to unke bache hee kamine hain,
Jo Mammu-Mammu bulaate hain.
Apni Surat ka kabhi to didaar de
tarap raha hu ab aur na intzaar de
Apni awaaz nahi sunani to mat suna
Kam se kam 1 Missed call hee maar de
"Sardar to his friend ""I kiss my Wife everyday before leaving for Office, what about you?"" Friend: I too, after you
leave."
(FW:)Dhrm lal: Bhgwan mje dukh day.azab dy,drd day,mje mar dy meray pechay bhoot lga dy. Bhgwan: Abay saalay! Aik
line men bol na biwi chaheay.
-Sardar apni Girl Friend ko I Love U kehta aur gir jata. I love u kehta aur Phir gir jata. Girl frend: Ye Kya kar rahe ho
Sardar : Oye I am falling in love . . .
-Bulbul ka bacha khata tha khichri peta tha pani gata tha gany mary sarany ik din akila bytha howa tha mai ny oraya wapis na
aaya kuti ka bacha ha ha ha ha ha
-Jale usay aag kahte hain..Bhuje howay ko rakh kahte hain..Cobra usay naag kahte hain..Or jo tumhare pas nahi,use dimag kahte
hain...
-What is a girl friend?Ans: addition of problem, Substraction of Money, Multiplication of Enemy, Division of Friends .. So b
Carefull
-Dnt snd any msgs, i dnt wnt 2 c u, 2 hear ur voice.2think of u , 2 keep in touch wid u !!Coz da doctor advised me 2 keep
away from sweets :)
-Hoon Main Doctor Jahan, Meri Wife Hai Nurse Wahan,Haye Kaisa zulm Sehna Per Raha hai.Mujhe Meri Wife Ko "sister" Kehna Per
Raha hai...
-Tum dour sahi majbor sahi,par yad tumhari ati ha,tum saans wahan laitay ho par badbu yahan tuk ati hai!UseCLOSE-UP!!Ab
Rs.5.only
Well come to Ramzan Menu, Apne GUNAH JHARNAY k liye 1 Dabayein.TOBA k liya 2 Dabayein.MAFI k liye 3 Dabayein.BURAEE SE NIJAT
k liye"APNA "GALA Dabayein.
Jub 1 chor shoes ki dukan pe chori kertey huwey pakra gya to usey addalat mein paish kia gya to judge ney uss sey
poochaJudge: jub tum chori ker rahey thy to tum ko apni biwi aur bachon ka koi khyal nahi aya ?Chor: Janab aya to tha magar
wahan sirf mardana jootey thy.
LOng TimE aGo...
oNLy idiOts usEd tO reAd mY SMs aNd TodaY......
THE HISTORY CONTINUES !....
Q:What's the difference between 'Love Marriage' & 'Arranged Marriage'? Answer: First one is suicide and second one is a well
planned murder.
hav you evr seen a monkey covered in a polythene ?
no???
....never mind...
juz hav a look at ur id-card!!
Sardar Ji Ki Girl Friend Ne Sardar Se Kaha,Girl Freind,"Darling! Meri Wish Hai k Tusi Maino Engagment Pe Ring Do."Sardar
Ji,"Ok! Give Me Ur Fone Number."
SMS na karke dil tod diya mera,
Aab mobile dafana dena,
Kafan na mile to apna rumal udha dena,
Koi puche rog kya tha to nazare jhuka ke apni kanjusi bata Dena
dil k mehman ban jao ankhon ka arman ban jao honton ki muskan ban jao yeh sab bi ban jana lakin, pehlay insaan to
ban jaooo,,,,,
Chori Chori Ye Aana Jana Chor DoChupke Chupke Yon Nazar MilanaChor DoKisi Din Buht Pito Gay Unse TumYe Masjidon Se Jootay
Churana Chor Do.
Boy: I can kiss u widout touchingGirl: U cant.Boy: Lagi 20 20 Rupay ki bet,Girl: ok(Boy Kisses Tightly)Girl: U Touched
me.Boy: Ye lo 20 Rupey.
AsSi PaGaL yAaR dE pEeChEyAaR pAgAL hOr De PeEcHeO pAgAl kiSi HoR dE pEeChEsArEy PaGaL aGeY pEeChE. :)
Tum dour sahi majbor sahi,par yad tumhari ati ha,tum saans wahan laitay ho par badbu yahan tuk ati hai!UseCLOSE-UP!!Ab
Rs.5.only
FATHER asks son "Beta tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?" SON "Mujhe chand jaisi biwi chahiye - jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali
jaye!"
Ek sardar apne marriage certificate ko 1 ghante se dekh raha thaWIFE: tussi inni der se ki dekh rahe ho?SARDAR: expiry date
dhoond rha hon.
Wife:Tum muje kitna piar krty ho! HUSBAND: shahjahan jitna. WIFE:!mery mrny ky bad Taj Mahal banaoge?HUSBAND!:maine to plot
bhi le liya hai,Delay to tm kr rahi ho.[8->
Dil se boloon ek baat main sachhi, hum tum ek daal ke do panchhi. Dosti hamari yeh hogi na kachhi, teri photo se to meri
negative achhi !Hahahaha..;o)
aaj dedaar kal yaar persun pyar phir ikrar or phir intazaar phir takraar phir daraar sari mehnat bekaar Or akhir mein aik or
devdas at beer bar
Usne hathon per mehndi lagai hui hai...Hum ne uske doli sajai hui hai...Hume pata tha woh bewafa nikle gi is liey...Humne
uski choti behan bhi phasai hui hai:-).
Sardar was riding on horse.he crossed da red light & policeman whistles.da sardar lifts da tail of horse & says."LE
KARLE,KARLE NUMBER NOTE".
Two sardars are driving in a car,one sardar puts on the indicator and asks the other to check if it is working.He puts his
head out and says?..yes..no..yes..no..Yes..no. . .
I want you to be with me in a nice restaurant to have candle light dinner and i say those sweet three words to you., "pay
the bill'"!'
BABA JI k melay main is saal parsaad main KAMBAL bantey jain gay,ye baat kisi or ko mat batana kyun k ye sms sirf "SELECTED
FAQIROON"ko he kya ja raha ha
Usse pyar karke meri kismat hi jaag gayi,Usse pyar karke meri kismat hi jaag gayi,Maine itne love letter post kiye k woh
"POSTMAN k saath hi bhaag Gayee"
Ya Rab dil e jawan mein ik zinda tmanna detu khwab k pyasy ko ta'beer ka darya deis bar makan badloon to aisi prosan dyJo
qalb ko garma de jo rooh ko trpa de
-Honto say jo chooh liya,Ehsas ab tak hay,aankhain num hainorSanso may aag ab tak hai,Or kyon na ho.........khai bhi to
.."HARI MIRACH"hai ;-)
-U stole my memories i excused uU stole my heart i excused u!U stole my smile i excused u!But dis is 2 muchMere doggy ka
biscuit wapis karo!!
-Itnay kamzor ho gaye teri judai se..Wah Wah WahArz kiya hyitnay kamzor ho gaye teri judai se..k ek din machar hi utha lay
gya charpai se:-)
-Sirf aik bar keh do jo december main tum nay kaha tha,sardiyun ki bheegi rätoon ka ehsas lota do,sirf aik bar keh doGARAM
anddaay...
-Child: Mom is Bar Hum Sarey Patakhy is Shop Se Lengey Mom:Lekin Beta Ye Tu Girls Hostel Hai. Child: Papa To Kehty Hein K
Sari Phul-Jhariyan Yahi Rehti Hein.
-Hi..Teacher ask childrn 'Wht do u wish 2 do in future?'Ali:I wnt 2 be a pilot.Imran:I wnt 2 be a doctor.Sana:I wnt 2 be a
good motherTahir:I wnt 2 help Sana
-=>GOD aap ki zindgi Menaar_e_Pakistan jitni lambi kare,aur har koi 5 rupey de kar aap par charh jaye..Aur Enjoy karey
(Ameen).hehehe
-Dad:putar tu ppr vich80%no lenay nePutar:dont worry mai100%lava gaDad:kanjra mazak karda way mery nalPutar:pehle mazak kis
kanjr ne shuro kita c
-Mat kar dost apni girl friend se itni mohabbat,Woh ankho se war karti hai.Mainay dekha hai uski ankho mai,Woh mujh se bhi
pyar karti hai.....
-Ek Molvi: Film actor k paas masjid ka chanda mangne gaya.Actor: Ap to kehte hain ka hamara pesa haraam heMolvi: Es pese se
ham latreen banaainge:-
-jis larki pe nzar rakhta hon uski ho jati hai shadijis larki pe nzar rakhta hoon us ki ho jati hai
shadiNIGHAH-E-MARD-E-MOMIN SE BADAL JATI HAIN TAQDEERAIN!
-Kashmir ki khoobsorat wadi may, baraf ki chotti pe,Aik romantic raat ko,HEER ne RANJHA se zor se kaha,'way tut paineya thand
ho gai a Koati pala'
-Gulaab ko bhi Kamal bana dete,Uski ek Ada pe Kai gazal bana dete,Kambhakt marti nahi mujh par larkiyaan,Warna LAHORE me bhi
TAJMAHAL bana dete...
-Kashmir ki khoobsorat wadi may, baraf ki chotti pe,Aik romantic raat ko,HEER ne RANJHA se zor se kaha,'way tut paineya thand
ho gai a Koati pala'
-If doctors start film making,the names of films will b:Operation Ho Na Ho,Kaho Na Bukhar Hai,Ham blood de chuke sanam,Dil
Wale Nurse Le Jaein ge.
-Tum Haseen!Tum Cute!Tum Great!Tum Famous!Tum Beautiful!Tum Inteligent!Tum Star!Tum Stylish!Ban Sakty Ho Agar Mujhe Follow
Karo !
-Lab Pe Ati He Dua Ban K Tmana Meri.DIL Karta Ha Band Karva Doon Sim Teri.Door Dunia Ka Mere Dam Se ujala Ho Jae.Jo Mujhe MsG
Na Kre Us Ka Mobile Kho Jae.
-Chandni rat mein sone se pahle,khwabon ki dunya mei khone se pehle Mai ne socha k tumhe yaad dila donSuSU KAR LENA SONE SE
PEHLE.
-PRACTICE it1. Take 1grape2. Take it in ur hand3. Put it in b/w ur fore teeth4. Approach da mirror slowly and seeWah!Langoor
k mu mei angoor
-Man to Doc:-> Is there any way for long life? Doc:-> Get married. Man:-> Will it help? Doc:-> No, but the thought of long
life will never come 2ur mind.
-Girl:Mai tumhare liye sub chor du gi.
Boy:Parents
Girl:Yes
Boy:Khana Pina
Girl:Yes
Boy:Apni Frnds
Girl:Yes
Boy:Star Plus
Girl:Mu Sambhaal k baat kar.
-Meine ÄAp kö khwab me dekhak aap hooron k darmian hemene ALLAH se pocha isko kis neki ki ye jaza mili heJawab aya:-isko jaza
nahi mili Huron ko saza mili he
-Jab say tum ko dekha haiMujhay raat ko neend nahi aati,Orjb b tumhari yaad aati haidil say ik aawaz aati hai(Jal tu Jalal tu
aayi bala ko tal tu).
-Teacher:is sentence ka urdu turjuma kero,"A beautiful girl is walking in a park"Student:Yarr!!! Bacchi check kar.."
-Arz kiya hai$amundar mein water,Water mein Fish... Aapko ASSALAM, Aapki girlfriend ko kiss...Mmmmuuuuaaaaahhhhhhh...Maza aa
gaya..:-)kal phir karungi...haha
-Girl:Ouch its 2 tightBoy:Dont worry Love,we'll do it slowlyGirl: Push it!!Boy: Aah..i can'tGirl: It's painful jaan,nikalo
bahar dard ho raha haiBoy: Forget it,lets get a "New WEDDING RING"
-On first night Dulha entering his room prayed"Oh GOD ! Mujhay taqat or guidance day"Dulhan boli "Aby ! taqat ki dua mang !
Guide mein khud kar don gi"
-Kaisa zamana aa gaya hai "WARID" Walo ne to had kar di.. bade bade poster me ek Ladki dikhate hai aur likhte hai: LAGE
RAHO.. RAT BHAR SIRF 10 PAISE MEIN
-Tum din ko rat kaho hum rat kahe ge,....Tum subah ko sham kaho hum sham kahain ge,.....Q k,.......Paglön se behUs ka kia
faida.
-Ek research se pata chala hay k monkey bhi sms parh saktay hain. Ye SMS apko final testing ke liye bhej rahay hain. Apna
certificate zoo se collect kar lain.
-Once there was a crow,Pind vich renda c o,1 din talli ute baitha c o,1 chirri de pichy pey gya c o,Chirri pai c ro,Chirri de
pio ne kuttya crow,Crow sherminda gya c ho,Hun chirri nu phen ji kainda c o,MORAL:Kisey de dhee bhein nu na cherro.
-Haseen tum ho to buray hum bhi nahi, Mehlo mein tum ho to sarkon pe hum bhi nahi, Dosti kar k kehtay ho BUSY ho, Kaan
kholkay sunlo Free hum bhi nahi..
-aik sheikh apnay totay say kahta hay"mian mitho chori khani hay" tota sheikh se"saliya kadi app v khadi ae"
-Kaise ho ab?theek ho?pain killer tablets lety rehna.Hajiyo ne bohat mara ho ga na pathro se.kya kerein is k baghair hajj
nahi hona tha na
-Thapar marne par naraz wife se shohar bola admi usay marta hai jise pyar karta he.Wife ne husbnd ko 2 thapr mare aur boli
ap kya samjte hai k main apse pyar nahi karti.
-Aapke liye 1 rishta aaya hai - Baap Hardware mein hai, Maa Software mein hai, Bhai Footwear mein hai, Aur ladka sirf
Underwear mein hai. Qubool??? ;-)
-
-Dad:What type of a Girl u want to marry.Son:I want to marry a girl who is Intelligent,Well-Studied,Obeys,Good-Looking
Dad:Then u have to marry 4 times!
-A girl reach late in class.Prof: why r u late?Girl: sir a boy wz following me?Prof: then why r u late?Girl: sir the boy wz
walking slowly.
-Is sms ko nini (sleep) chor kar mat parho.is sms ko ap baad main be par sakte han.yeh sms koi joke nai hay yeh sms bohat
imprtnt bhi nai hayIs sms main ap ko kUch kahna nai hayyeh sms thora lamba zaror haypar yeh sms kUch khas nai haypar mjhy is
bat ke samj nai ate kah ap is sms ko itne dehan say kyon par rahe hainyeh sms to main ne waisa he fwd kya thaAp ko gusa to
aya hoga par kia karon,.........Mjhey bhi aya tha;-)
-Wife, pointing at a couple next door, says 2 her husband: "Look at him he kisses her all the time. Why cudn't U do that?"
Husband: "I tried but she Slapped me
-Every body wantsSum 1 specialSum 1 niceSum 1 cuteSum 1 smartSum 1 sweetSum 1 honestTabhi to mein sochoon sarey merey pechy Q
parey hein......;)
-1 chota child apni mom se a ker apny mulazomu ki shikayt karne laga. Ami. Bashir or Noora kitchen mai eik dosary ki kamar
per hath daly pata nai kia batain ker rahey thay.mai achank undar gea tu 2no alang ho gae. KIA,... Mai abi 2no ko batati ho
ja ker k bacho k samny aesi harkaty kartey hai. 2no ko nokri se nikalti ho.abi wo murhi he the k bache ki talia bajane ki
awaz per ruk gai. April fool, april fool.... Wo bashir tohri tha wo tu papa thay.
-If I need brain transplantation I will definitly prefer ur brain..y? bcos Ur Genius... Na Na I just want a brain which is
never used B4 Bole to ZerometeR
-Kaash Main Teri Haseen NAAK Ka Chooha Hota...Tu Bari Chah Se Baray Maan Se Nikalti Mujhko...Main Teri Unglion Main Sharma
kar CHIPAK sa jataPhir Tu Apni Sahelion se CHUPATI MujhkoMain unko Dekh kar DARR sa jata..Tu Duniya se Chup kar Kahin
CHIPKATI Mujhko or is Tarhan Main AMAR ho jata
-JoHo GayaWo Ho GayaJoHona HogaWo HogaAur JoNahi Hona HaiWo Nahi HogaKyun kay JoHona HaiWo ToHoga He HogaAb Dekhna HaiKay
kyaHoga..?AurKya NahiHoga.Hone ko ToKuch BhiHogaYehi Sochna HaiKay KyaHoga..?AgarKuch Hoga ToTheek HogaAurNahi HogaTo
BhiTheek HogaAurTheek Nahi HogaTo KuchKaisay Theek Hoga?Ab aap batao kAgayKya hoga?KisiAurKoTum, bhi..bhejo,..acchha..time
pass hoga..!
-Mallika Sherawat goes to skin doctor and asks: main nahatey waqt kya lagaun? DoctOr:Bathroom ki kundi :))
-Girl: if u try 2 kiss me "mein shor macha doon gi?Boy: lekin yahan tu dor dor tak koi nahi hai.Girl: magar formality tu pori
karni hai....
-2 khoosray kaheen ja rahay thay un mai say ek neechay gir gaya to dosray nay ussay uthatay huay kaha "Utho behan mard bano "
-Apni mehbooba ko kabhi chand mat kehna. kyun ke suna hai ke chand par bhi 24 banday charh
chuke aur ek kuta bhi.
-Aik hindu nay musalman say pocha hindu ko jalate or muslman ko dafnate kion hain ? Musalman very simple Khazanay ko
dafnatay hain or kachray ko Jalatay hain'.
-When I Call u,1 ring means I'm thinking of u, 2 rings means I like u, 3 rings means i'm missing u,4 rings
means i need u, 5 rings means.....BEHRE HO PHONE UTHAO JULDI!!!
-O mery dil de chain, tery pichay kutte pain, tu lutiya mere dil da chain,rab kare tenu keeray pain, tery nain bary
nasheely,jeeven jharoo de teelay, tu mery dil wich idaan wasi,jeeven kichar wich maj phasi,jane jigar jane tamanna,eddar aa
teriyan latta pannan..
-MSG karne pe jo marte hain...CALL karne se jo darte hain...BAD LUCK to dekho...!!!..????Aisy KANjÖÖS dost mere he palle
parte hain..!hehehehe
-Lab-e-ati hai dua ban k tmna meri Zindagi ek LOVER ki sorat ho Khudaya meri IMPRESS muj se her ek larki ho jai meri ek nazar
pe dil apna wo de jai ho meri JEANS se yohi mere badan ki zenat jistarha MAKEUP se hoti ha husan ki zenat ho mera kam
school,college k bahir flurt krna her HASEEN larki ki maan se bi mohabat krna mere ALLAH ho perhai se bachna muj ko ISHQ KI
JO RAH HO USSI RAH PE CHALANA MUJHKO
-1nce there ws 2 lvrz,they made much lv wid eachother...1day by chance,boy decided 2 run away 4rm d house,but d girl refused
2 do so.Boy said if she'll not run wid him he wud lie his life..or he will do suicide..But d grl still not agree wid
him,atlast d boy kill himself.wen d grl reached there,her hands were red wid boy's blood,boy were breathing last...he said
her dont tell any1 abt dis n died.Wen d grl reached back,her mother askd her abt d blood n d boy.She told nothing,n sat on
bed..bedsheet spoted wid blood.She ws afraid n told her mother abt blood.Than police came there n girl cried"maa ab kia
hoga,POLice mujy arrest kr ly ge?"Mother said: dont worry SURF EXcEL hai na...Hahahaha ha ha ha ha kasa ha?
-Which is the longest toilet in the world?guess!!!"Pakistan railways tracks"coz u can use it from Karachi to Khyber.Proud to
be a Pakistani [;-)]
- Boys: KHUDA bachaye hamein in haseenoh se,naazneenon se,dilnasheenon se,jaanasheenon se.......,.,.,Par inhe kon bachaye hum
kameenon se.
-Aik Murghi 3Andey Deti He Aur Dua Karti He K Us K Bache Naek Hon.Jb Us K Bache Ando Se Bahir Atey Hain To 1Namaz Parh Rha
Hota He,2Tasbih Prh Rha Hota He Lekin 3Bahir Nhi Ata.Murghi Ro K Dua Krti He K Us Ka 3Bacha B Bahir Ajaye,Itne Me Andey Se
Awaz Aati He K Ami Jan Me Eitkaf Me Betha Hon.HA HA HA HA
-God apun se bola,"KHIDAR JANE KA"Jannat ya Dozakh!Apun bola DozakhU know apun aisa q bola?Becoz apun ko maloom hai k tum
sala dost log wahi milay ga.
-Ik adme chopkay say jahunam say nekla aur janat main chala gayafreshtay na pakar ker khub mara.adme utha or bolaTUHADE INA
HARKTA TO KOI JANAT WECH NAI ANDA
-Sab dost bewafa ho gaye, hum apne mobile se khafa ho gaye,ek sms to kar de zaalim,warna duniya wale samjhenge hum dono juda
ho gaye......
-Sas bahu se:beti tu chup q rhti he. Bahu_Man g meri man ne kha tha k chup rehna.sas: nen beti tu bola krbahu: man g agr ap
ka beta mr jay to kia meri 2sri shadi kr do gi.Sas: beti tu chup reh teri man ne thek kha tha.
-Neend ati hai to KHUWÄB ata hai..Khuwabo mei ek LERKI ati hai..LERKI k pechay uska BÄÄP ata hai..PhirNa NEND ati hai Na
KHUWÄB ata hai.;-)
-Larki:Aisa khat likh sajna way,meri umer beet jaye pardhay
PardhayBoy:¥§¿(i@0;>¤€~¡;+e¥B#);a£"£;=£"e*+2=*€@<>€$¤¿¤£>€+%¥€~Ley hun parhdi reh sari umray
-A beautiful poem on tatti,Read it carefully.Tatti meri pyari tatti,Flush wich shingaari tatti,Peeli tatti-kaali tatti,Haayo
meri pyari tatti,Kudrat da dastoor nirala,Saaryan nu hi aave tatti,Khulke je naa aave tatti,Sachi bara satave tatti,Lagataar
je aave tatti,Sab de hosh udave tatti,Ander pata nahi factory kedi,Jedhi roz banave tatti,Rab kare savere tainu, Bhangra
kardi aave tatti,Aye SMS sab nu forward kar,Nai to band hove teri tatti.
-=>Pagal hain wo loug ju piyar mein larkioun ko miss karty hainkarna hy tou macharoun ko miss karo ju khud aa kar kis karte
ha.
-Phullan nal gulaban da ki tuk bnda a,Bootan nal juraban da ki tuk bnda a,A hi soch k main khali chadh aya paper nooK Swalan
nal jwaban da ki tuk bnda a...
-KASHTI Chali KINARA Choot gayaAASMAN se SITARA Toot gayaTu bhi to Aaj tak nahi SudhraJahan DekhiDIWAARWahin MOOT gaya.( ".)
< )', - - . LL ,.,.,: -Dr: Aap ko kya problem hai?Patient: Patle motion.Dr: Kitne patle?Patient: Booohaaat patle.Dr: Fir b kitne?Patient: Itne k Aap us se kulli kar sakte hain. -Tere gham me tarap k Mar Jayenge,Mar GayeTo Tera Nam Le jaenge,Rab Ko kah k Tuje Bi bulae ge,aur Upper Sath Baith k KURKURE khayen ge..... -Js Trha Soraj Nikalta Hai Hr Raat K BaadChand Alwida Kehta Hy Mulaqat K BaadAp Ghr Se Mt Nikalyega Wrna Log KahngeDkho Lizard Nikal Ayi Barsat K Baad ;-) -Aap kya jaano hum kitna yaad karte hain maano ya na maano har pal fariyaad karte hain Roz khat likhte hain CARTOON NETWORK ko aur aapko play karne ki maang karte hain.... waaaaahhhhhhhhh... -girls ke college me strike thi,boys bhi unke saath ho liye,girls ne nara lagaya "hamare mange" picche se boys ki awaaz aayi "sindoor se bharo"........ -Jin: kia hukam ha meray aqaa?Man: meray liye khobsurat aur chikni larkian laoJin: mein kokaf ka jin ho heera mandi ka kanjer nahi ;-) -Moulvi: "Jab mein mar jaaun to samney walon ko zaroor bulana".Bivi: "kyon?"Moulvi: "kyu kaay unkey ghar ki auratein murdey se lipat lipat kay roti hain"......! -=>GirltoboyDarling,Ek 1000ka card send karo mera balnc end ho gaya hy-tm mere ashiq ho na,boymay tmhra ashiq ho KOI warid
WALO KA jawai NAi.
-College wali:Masale dar...Office wali:Narum narum.Muhale wali:Namkeen...Ghar wali:Garma garm.Aap kya samjay?Mei to "ROTI" ki
bat kr rahi hon
-Yaad rakh kar meri dosti ko tum ne
Meri zindgi par ek ehsaan kar diya Is mobile mein yeh last rupeya tha,Dekho hum ne woh bhi TMHARE NAAM kar dia
-College is 4 Knowledge, Knowledge is 4 Life, Life is 4 Wife but Wife is a knife which cuts ur Life,so never choose Ur Wife
in a college Life...! :->.....
-Mast nazron se dekh lena tha,Agr tmana thi azmanay kiHm yunhi behosh hojatay kya zrorat thi Juraben sunghany ki...
-Lmha lmha umar guzar jayegi,ShadI k BÅÑDHÅÑ me koi ÅP k bandh jaegi,Abhi b waqt hai kissi se ÅFFÅIR krlo,Kya pta kl konsi
CÅRToòN Ap ki DULHAN bnjaegi...:)
-1 MURGHI ne 3 anday diye. or dua mangi babies naik nikley.kuch din bad babies niklay.Pehla baby namaz parhta hua
nikla.Dosra baby Tasbih parhta hua nikla.Tesre anday se baby nahi nikla to murghi pareshan ho gai, itney may andy se awaz
aai, Ammi mein aetakaf may betha hun.
-Hlchl...gandhi g ki dhoti me...mein hun na...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...dil wale dlhnya le jaein ge...gandhi g ki dhoti
mein...lge rho muna bhai...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...kuch kuch hota hai... gandhi g ki dhoti mein...aa ab lot chlein...gandhi
g ki dhoti mein...masti...aao romance krein...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...koi mil gya...gandhi g ki dhoti mein....
-Dont take it personal its 4 fun!O mere dik de chain,Tere piche kute pain,Tu lutya mere dil da chain,Rab kare tenu kery
pain.Tere nain bare nashile ne,Jevain jharu de tile ne.Tu mere dil vich iss tarha vasi,Jivain kichar vich majh
phasi.Jan-e-jigar jan-e-tamanna,Edhar aa terian latta panna.
-In next 15 minSALMAN KHANwill calluAMIR KHANwill calluSAIF ALIwil caluFARDEENwil calluSHAH RUKHwillcall u2 ask my phone
numberplz mat dena.
-Baby baby Yes mama Ka punjabi version: Kaky kaky? Han baybay Phak lai cheeni Na baybay Jhoot marda Na baybay Laawaan
jutti Na baybay Khol bootha hahaha
-Boy friend:mein tum se shadi nahe ker sakta ghar waley mana ker rahay hain.Girl friend:ghar mein kon kon hai.Boy friend: 1
biwi or 3 bachay.
-When nobody luvs u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody think about u,every1 ignores u, then go n sit in the corner close ur eyes n
think !BHAINCHOD CHAKAR KYA HAI.
-Mareez Munna bhai say:yeh pholoon ki mala kis kay liye.?Munna bhai:"Bolay to" yeh apun ka pehla operation hay.Success huwa
to mere liye,nahi to taray liye.!
-Tumhe kia pta k gum kia hay..Tumhe kia pta gum kise kehty hain..Tum kia jan0 gum kia chez hyTum ne to hmeshathook se he
envelope chipkaya hay.
-Tumhe kia pta k gum kia hay..Tumhe kia pta gum kise kehty hain..Tum kia jan0 gum kia chez hyTum ne to hmeshathook se he
envelope chipkaya hay.
-When nobody luvs u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody think about u,every1 ignores u, then go n sit in the corner close ur eyes n
think !BHAINCHOD CHAKAR KYA HAI.
-1 aadmi Bhagwan Se:Bhagwan g ap kab khush hote hain? Bhagwan:Jab Indian film me koi vilan lrki ko pakrta hai Or lrki kehti
hai,Plz muje Bhgwan k liye chord do.
-Neend di goli kha lay changa ray ga,Sochan kolon jan chura lay changa ray ga,FA,BA,MA di degre lay kay ki hassil,Dahi bhalay
di rehri la le changa ray ga.
-Neend di goli kha lay changa ray ga,Sochan kolon jan chura lay changa ray ga,FA,BA,MA di degre lay kay ki hassil,Dahi bhalay
di rehri la le changa ray ga.
-In Our Life, Six Things Can Come At Any Time...1- LOVE2- FRiENDSHiP3- MONEY4- ILLNESS5- DEATH6- ? ? ?... Su Su..."Is liye
kar ke sona!
-Ankho ka Docter mareez ko aty dykh ker bola.Ap ki nazer to waqae kharab hy.mareez ap ko ksy pta chala Dr.kyu k ap derwazy ki
bajay kherki sy ander ay hen....
-Today is death aniversary of CHARLI CHAPLIN... so plz send this message to at least one cartoon. I have done my job.
-Romantic shayari; Kutta marr gaya razai vich,main pagal ho gaya teri judai vich, Fernail te machchar beh nahi sakda, main
tere bina hun reh nahi sakda.
--Judge: Why do u want divorce?Man: My wife doesn't satisfy me in bed.Judge to wife: Is it correct?Wife: Sara mohalla khush
hai, bas esi ko taklif hai.
-Chand Par Ap ka Naam Likhne Ko Ji Chahta
Hai..................................Par?Par?KyiaKareinYeKhayalHameshaDopahairKoHiAataHai.....!
-Pakistan ka matlub kiaBum Dhamakay or AghwaYEH tera Pakistan ha na mera Pakistan haiYe uska Pakistan ha jo Sadr-e-Pakistan
haiPAKISTAAAAAAAN!Se Zinda Bhag
-MUSHARAF ne apni Biwi ko surprise dene k lye apni Munchen ktwali or chupke se so gya,Nend me jb Biwi ne mouh pe hath phra to
boli-SHOKAT AZIZ Tum aj phir agaye?
-Ye badal, ye bijli, sirf aap k liye hai, ye mausam ye hawa sirf ap k liye hai,Zamana beet gaya aap ko nahae hue,Ye bewaqt ki
barish sirf aap k liye hai.
-Kya hai yaar,Ap b ajeeb ho,Meray dil k kareb ho,Miltey ho na sms krtay ho,Kya ...Mjh ....Se ......Bhi ......Zyada
.....Gareeb .....Ho ......
-Many many HAPPY RETURNS of the Day 2 u. Dekha tum ne kya socha tha..? tum nahi bataogay to muje pata nahi lagega k
aj........¤ANIMAL'S DAY HAI¤
-Molvi ne grl frnd ka bda intzAr kia pr wo na i tng A k us ne loud speakr pe kaha
hazrAAt.....! chnhggi nai kiti.....!!:)
-Sumeera Malik Ne Maulana Fazl.ur.Rahman Se Shikayat Ki K Sheikh Rasheed Muj Pe Awazain Kasta Hai K"I LOVE U"...aurSher Afgan
Se Bi Tung Hoon... Wo Bi Mujhay Cherrta Hai. Maulana Ne Dono Haatho Ko Phelaya aur Kaha : fikr mut kero aur"Aao ISLAM ki
AGHOSH Mein Aajao"
-Ik tchr ne apne student se pucha k btao billi dumm kyöñ hilati haì,to student ne kaha kyøñ k mi$s dumm billi kö nahi hila
sakti.. :-) hahahahahahaha
-Agr"dil"ko anda(egg) kehty to films k naam aise hote>hum anda de chuke sanam>yeh anda ap ka howa>hum ap k andy main rehty
hyn>andy waly dulhania ly jayngy
-Tanhai me na waqt bitaya karo Kabhi kabhi mehfilo me bhi aya karo kia hua jo toot gaye hen samne k 4 daant Phir b moun
khol kar muskuraya karo.:p
-Dil karta hey,Lamba 5 inch ho,Denga be ho,Mota be ho, Poora under chala jahey, bar bar jahey,Maza be ahey,Pani be
neklay,Kash tum be hotay, Hum dono hath sae pakartay aur dabatay, Pher CHOPA lagatay''MANGO'' ka !!
-I Love three thing.1= pizza 2= pepsi 3= you...Reasons :...Pizza to eat...Pepsi to drink....And you to........Tabel kon saaf
karay ga?
-Tip of the day:Always keep ur pic in ur pocket,u knw y?Whnever u face any problem just c ur pic & say 3times"If i can face
this,I can face anything!!
-QAID.E.AZM k 3 farman :1. "Awam ki taraqi ki bunyad SMS pe rakhi jati ha2. "Cal karo! is se mohabt barhti ha"3. aur "jis ne
misd call ki wo hum ma se nai
-Samandar k kinary betha kro,koi na koi lehr to ay ge,kismat na badly to kya howa,kamaskam? SHAKAL HI DHUL JAY GE:
-Aaj MOSAM mai Kuch AJEEB si Baat haiAaj BE KABU se Mrey JAZBAT haiG Chahta hai k apko CHURA Lu ap seMagar MaMa kehti
hainChori Karna"BURI BAAT" hai...
-1 khusray k pas qabar mai frishta aya,Aor bola ,jenab hasab dewo,khusra bola,sanu deta ki si ?jera tanu hasab dayie !
-Samandar k kinary betha kro,koi na koi lehr to ay ge,kismat na badly to kya howa,kamaskam? SHAKAL HI DHUL JAY GE:
-door se dekha to sher aa raha tha wah wah wah door se dekha to sher aa raha tha, paas hum gae nai kyun ki sher aa raha tha
wah wah wah wah!
-Pyar ko mat chhupao,usy zarurat hai jatane ki,Apni khuahishon ko mat chupao,unhe zrurat hai bahirane ki,Ab aur perfume mat
lagao, tumhe zarurat hai nahane ki:p
-Kash tum wadday apnay nibah jatay . .Kisi tarah mera dil behla jatay . . .10 Rs. nahi thay tu . . .5 Rs. wali choti coke hi
peela deatay .
-Subha sham AAP ki yad Aave hai,Sari Rat jagave hai,Karne ko to kar lein CALL AAP ko,Par Customer center ka Wo larki,Bar Bar
Balance low Bataave hai.
-Media ask ABHISHEK.....What is the difference between old & new UMRAO-JAAN???..Abhishek: Naye wali se APNI setting hai...Aur
purani wali se PAPA ki... ;o>
-A LOVE STORYDay1: Aik larka aik larkiDay2: Wohi larka doosri larkiDay3: Wohi larka teesri larki MORALLarkian badal
jati hain BUT Larky nai bdalty
-Hum dosti puri nibhana jante hain,zakham tumhare kitne bi gehre ho hum dawa lagana jante hain.Hume Bhulne ki kosish mat
karna,hum gala dabana b janty hain
-LOVE is IODEX."Ooh ah ouch dur kary"LOVE is SUPREEME."Yehi to hai wo apna paan"LOVE is HABIB COOKING OIL."Q K yeh dil ka
mamla hai".LOVE is GOLD LEAF " Sehat k liye muzzir hai ".LOVE is SUFI BANASPATI""Jo naam hai Aitemaad ka".LOVE is
disprin''bachon ki pohanc se dor rakhain''
-Pyar K Geet Gayen GayHum Tum,Apni Dunya Basaaen Gay Hum Tum,Jo Diye Bujh Gaey Hawaaon Se,Un Ko Bech Kr,PHiLiPS K BULB Layen
Gay Hum Tum
-man runs home nd shouts: PACK UR BAG HONEY, I JUST WON 10 MILLION DOLLARS IN LOTERYwife: do i pack 4 beach or resort?man:
who cares? just pack n get lost ;)
-Kanjosi da matlab kia?Na sms kar Na cal mila Parh parh sms hasda ja Saadi ker na koi parwa Saada balance roz muka Apne set
nu..tala la..!
-2 Pyaz,3 Lehsun,5 Gram Zeera,3 Kali Mirch,2 Spoon Namak,4 Spoon Oil,1 Cup Water Or Thora Sa Hara Dhaniya,Pata Ha Mai Kya
Bana Rahi Hon?Ullu :-P
-Wife:India jao to saarhee bhejna,Dubai jao to jewelry,France jao to perfume!Husband ne jal ke kaha,dozakh jaon to kia
bhejon?Wife:APNI VIDEO.
-Jab Sher (Lion) 3 dafa Dahaarta hai to kya hota hai?...Think.....Any Guess?......Ok I WiLL TeLL u...Tom & Jerry Cartoon
Shuru Hota Hai!;-)
-Jab hum roya karenge teri yadein dhoya karenge,Jub tak jiya karenge tujhe yaad kiya karenge,Hum mar bhi jaye to kya
hua,FARISHTON k mobile se SMS kiya karenge.
-Ho Nahi Sakta k Muhjy teri Yaad na aye, Bhool k b Bhulaon wo Waqt na aye, Tum Bhulo to Tumhen Agli Sans na aye,ma Bholon
to....Benda Bhool hi Jata hy
-Tum paas ayeyun muskurae..apne 32 daant mujhko dikhae!ab to mera Dil phoot phoot k rota hai..yar tumse to brush bhi theek se
nahi hota hai!
-Today i have not sent Sms 2 anybody Except U.Today i have not thought about anybody Except U.BcozmyPolicy isOne day One
Fool.....;-)
-LOVE is IODEX."Ooh ah ouch dur kary"LOVE is SUPREEME."Yehi to hai wo apna paan"LOVE is HABIB COOKING OIL."Q K yeh dil ka
mamla hai".LOVE is GOLD LEAF " Sehat k liye muzzir hai ".LOVE is SUFI BANASPATI""Jo naam hai Aitemaad ka".LOVE is
disprin''bachon ki pohanc se dor rakhain''
-Pyar K Geet Gayen GayHum Tum,Apni Dunya Basaaen Gay Hum Tum,Jo Diye Bujh Gaey Hawaaon Se,Un Ko Bech Kr,PHiLiPS K BULB Layen
Gay Hum Tum
-A begger beg to me:Allah k naam pe kuch dede baba.I replied:Mere paas paise nahi hai,Ye sms parhne wale ko le
ja.Begger:Maine bheek mangi hai bhikari nahi;o)
-1 Boy apni GF k liye Chooriyan le k gyaGF: Khudhi pehna do.Boy: Mujhe nhi pata tha k itna acha response mile ga,warna mai
Kapre hi le aata.
-The latest Slogen of boys:Pakistan is our Nation,Girls are our Destination,Dating is our Occupation,Flirting is our
Profession,Bhar me jaye Education
-ZINDAGI k KATHHIN or DUSHWAAR raaston pay kon aap ka saath NIBHATA hai?Aap k dost?Ya phr, aap k relatives???G nahiSrf or srf
Aap ke CHAPPAL!
-Raatoon ko neend na aaye, din ko chain na aaye, jb hum ne RAB se poocha a RAB kia yahi pyaar hai,To RAB ne kaha nahi LIGHT
k bina sab ka yehi haal hai!;-)
-Musharraf to his Corps Commanders:What r your plans for Defence?Corps Commanders:Sir,We r soon going to start Phase 8 in
Defence Lahore..
-Other girl:Pehla Pehla pyar hai,Chali bhar hai,Aja sajna tera intezar haiNCA girl:Pehla pyar hai,Dusri/Tisri bar hai,Aj
Zyada sajna,verna dusra tyar hai
-Kahi andhaira to kahin shaam hogi meri har khushi tere nam hogi kuch mang k to dekho hum se ae dost Bijli Pani ka bill aur
karz mein dobi proprty tere nam hogi.
-If MOLVIS start film making,names of films will bIslam aya tm na aye,Kaho na Ramzan hai,Hum zakat de chuke sanam,Maseet mere
veer di,Kabhi roza kabhi namaz,Humari Tasbih apke paas hai,Imam banaya ap ne,Aa ab namaz parhein,Shaheed to hona hi
tha,Molana ap k hain kon,Paisy waly Hajj Kar jayenge.S
-Pathan ko uska sasur peet raha ta.Y?His wife gave birth of a Baby.Doctor sent him SMS"Mubark ho, aap baap ban gaye".Pathan
forwarded it to all his friends
--Dekhein tamasha! Meharban Qadardan
dekhein mere Sms ka kamal Tone bji, bandr ne mobile uthaya sms parhaor muskuraya Ab ye sms 4wrd karke hoshyari dikhaega :)
-What is the difference Between1) Call Girl 2) Girl Friend 3) Wife ? Ans: . . . .1) Prepaid 2) Postpaid 3) Unlimited.
-Congrats! Ur phone has been installed wth a new puzzle game.2 play..,Just throw ur cel phone against the wall & arrange the
pieces back.Its fun! Try it!
-Today's Titanic's 94 Anniversary,So Every True Lover Requested To Put Their Mobile Into Water For 2 Minutes,In MeMory Of
Jack And Rose.
-Hum jaise dost hote nahi sab k liye,Ye tohfa hai kisi kisi k liye,kyun jala rakhi hai shama bujha hi di jiye,Kiya hum kam
hain ROSHNI k liye.
-Hello: itna sannata kyun hai.?Kitni der se sms ki Ghanti nahi baji.?Kia Ye saare network fuse hogaey.?Ya muje sms krny walay
kanjos ho gay hain
-Le Kar Dil Wapas Kiya Nahi Jata..Yu Naazuk Dil Ko Zakham Diya Nhi Jata..Sach Much Ye Duniya Bohat Zalim Hai..SmS Sasta Hai
Phir Bhi Aap Se Ye Kiya Nahi Jata.
-Faqeer! 1 rupia de do.Bacha! TAMATAR khaao.F! 1 rupia de do.B!TAMATR khaao F! Kya matlab? Bachey ki maan boli ye TOTLA hai.
Kehta hai KAMA KER khaao.
-Rabba dukh na devin yaar mery nu...Sanno chahy dukhan da pahad dy dy...Phiry nawi SOHRAB CYCLE utty yar mera...Sannu pavein
purani HONDA VTI car dy dy;-
-U stolemy memories,i excused u!U stolemy laugh.I excused u!U stolemy smile,i excusedu!Btthis isToo muchmere doggy ki plate
to wapis karo yar :-D
-Zindagi mai Jab Tumko koi Rasta Dikhai Na De,koi Manzil Dikhai Na De,Koi Apna Dikai Na De,To Tm Mere Pas anamei TumkoEye
Specialist K Pas Le Jaun ga
-Suno,Mehsos karo,Badal ki GARAJ,BIJLI ki chamak,Barish ki ik ik boond,Tum seCheekh cheekhKar keh rahi hai; ABEY Kalay AB TO
NAHA LAY
-Aj ka sawal?Mohabat ho jati hai,ya,karni parti hai?Very simple!......Khobsorat ho to ho jati hai'..agar ameer ho to karni
parti hai ;-) yes this is love
-Maine kaha Dil RubaUsne kaha balance bhijwaMaine kaha Paise NahiUsne kaha Kaise nahiMaine kaha Mehangai HaiUsne kaha Ja aaj
se tu mera bhai hai
-Q: Zamin pe rehny waley janwer bachy dety hanHawa me urny waley undy dety habt wo konsi chez hai jo hawa me b urti hai or
bachy b deti ha?.Ans:Air hostess.
-Teacher:Boys, aap ko aamir khan aur kajol ki film 'FANA' se kia lesson mila.?........Student:Andhi,looli,langri,jo bhi mile,
phasa le bhai! :p
-A couple had a fight one night. When they were going to bed, Husband taunted: "Goodnite mother of 3 kids".Wife replied:-
"Good night Father of none".
-Aj ki khas khas khabrenGud Morning& hav a nice day,Or ab tafseel:Aj b rozana ki trah sms ki barish jari rahay gi,Call ane k
b imkan hai orMiscals k badal b kafi mobiles pe chaye rahenge,Aj pore din bar bar vibration k jhatky lagte rahe ge, Mazid
khabron k liye dekhty rahen mere sms,Shukria
-Many Many HAPPY Returns Of The Day 2 You...Dekha aap ne Kya Socha Tha?K ap Nhi BataoGay To Mjhe Pata Nhi Lage Ga Ki
Aaj...?ANIMALS DAY Ha.
-Na pyar, na yar,Na mohbt, na dosti yaro,Aj k is devdas ki bat mano,Na chandrmukhi, na paro,Bs har larki ko line maro HAPPY
POONDI day.
-Mom:Beta Q ro rhe ho?Beta:Teacher ne mara ha..Mom:Q Mara?Beta:Maine unhy MURGI kaha tha..Mom:Q kaha?Beta: unho ne mujhe test
me ANDA jo dya tha.
-Student ask Teacher sir monkey aur donkey mei kya farak hai?TEACHER,agar msg pherne wala hans pare to M0NKEY agar na hanse
to DONKEY.
-1 bacha paida hote hi nurse se bola mobile hai kya? nurse boli hai lekin karega kya? bacha: kuch nahi bs wo GOD ko mis cal
krni hai k me pohanch gaya hun ;-)
-Why is "SINGH" Added to Every Sardars Name ?Because Of Its Hidden Meaning :
S - Sala
I - Insaan
N - Nahi
G - Gadha
H - Hai
-Yestrdy my mobile have accident with MOTOROLA and admitted to LG hospital near SAMSUNG chowk.Dr.NOKIA said"Matter is
serious.Sms needed"So plz donate SMS.
-How romantic jatt will propose a girl?Teri boothi local bus vargi Mera ticket katuan nu je kardaTeri taur ni sohnye maj
vargi Mera sangal pan nu je karda..
-Philosophy of Boys:Flirt wid innocent grlsFrndship with Charming grlsContact with Cute grlsLove wth Sincere grlsAnd Marriage
with"JESI AMMI KI MERZI"
-Mujh se kya ghalti ho gai?Then y r u avoiding me? Atleast week mein ek dafa tou yad kr liya karoUr behaviour is really
hurting Me.With Loveur.BATH SOAP!
-Ishq da jis nu khawab aa janda way,Waqt ohda samjho kharab aa janda way,Mehboob ohda aavay ya na aavay,Taaray gin gin ohnu
hisaab aa janda way.
-Sitaron se aagay jahan aur bhi hain,Parosioo ki do Larkian aur bhi hain,Tu Nadan aik Biwi pe kahan Atak gaya,Shariyat main 3
Biwiyian aur bhi hain.
-2007 k bhikari: Amma thoda khana hai to do na...! Amma:- abhi nahi banaya hai...! Bhikaari:- to banane k baad missed call
de dena... ;->
-Tere te qurbaan sadi yari ay,Hass k mr jayiye iss di v tyari ay,eh silsila na khtam hovy apni yari da,assi tainu yaad
kita,chall hun tere vari ay
-Philosophy of Boys:Flirt wid innocent grlsFrndship with Charming grlsContact with Cute grlsLove wth Sincere grlsAnd Marriage
with"JESI AMMI KI MERZI"
-Bap bete se:Beta meri nasihat pe amal krna,kabhi shadi na krna. Beta:Theik hy papa! mein khud b amal
krun ga aur apne beton ko b kahun ga.
-Ab tak meri life khuli bottle thiIs may se sab perfume ki tarah urh jata thaPer ap k ane se sab sahi ho gayaALLAH karey ap
jaisa DHAKKAN sab ko miley.
-Election k zmane me 1 syastdan hospital me tehal rha tha.Nurse i mubark di,aur boli: apke 3 judwan bche hue hyn. Syastdan:ye
nhein ho skta....dobara ginti krwao
-Kafi arsay pehle ki baat hai.KMere "SMS" Sirf Ahmak aur Bewaqof parhtey they.Aur..Aur..Auraj tak ye silsila jari hai:-)
-Musharraf ki biwi pareshan hai.Musharraf: Kya hua kyon pareshan ho??Biwi: Didn't u see the newspaper?Benazir says I want
Musharraf without uniform ! -;)
-Ae Dost Tu B Likha Kar Shayari... Meri Tarah Tera B Naam Ho jaey ga..Log Phenkain ge Anday Aur Timator...To Sham ki Sabzi ka
Intizam Ho Jaey ga!
-Dil ka dard dil tornay wala kya jane,pyar ke riwajon ko zamana kiya jane,Hoti hai kitni takleef bachi phasanay main,ye ghar
betha bachi ka baap kiya jane..$
-Haqeeqat samjho ya afsaanaApna samjho ya beganaHamara aapka rishta hai puranaIs liye farz tha aapko batanaK Garmi aa gai hai
Ab shuroo ker do nahana!!
-Sardar proposed girl with romentic poetryKutta mar gaya razai meMain pagal hoon teri judai meGobar pay machar beth nahi
saktaSardar tery bin reh nai sakta
-Ghalib ne apni girl Friend ko date pr bulaya wo late hogaiGirl: Am i late?Ghalib: Falak pe sitaro ko nend arahi hyDusri ka
time ho gaya or tu ab Aarahi hy?
Roshni dekar doob jana koi suraj se sikhay...........
Dil dekar dard leana koi hum se sikhay..........
Dil lekar kuch na dena koi unse sikhay.........
mail per kar jawab na dena koi app sa sikhay
hahahahahahahahaha
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
---
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
---
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
Toot Jaate Hain Sabhi Rishte Magar
Dil Se Dil Ka Rishta Apni Jagah
Dil Ko Hai Tujh Se Na Milne Ka Yaqeen
Tujh Se Milne Ki Dua Apni Jagah
---
Mast Nazron se dekh lenaa tha..
Agar tamanna thi Aazmane ki..
Hum to Behosh Yun hi ho jaate..
Kya zaroorat thi muskurane ki..
---
Chehrey Per Banawat Ka Gussa,
Aankhon Say Chalakta Pyar Bhi Hai,
Is Shauq-E-Ada Ko Kya Kahiye
Inkar Bhi Hai Iqraar Bhi Hai.
---
Raat bhar jaagi ho jiske sapno mein,
kaise kho gaya wo raat ke andhero mein,
Dhoondti rahi tum mujhe, dil ke kisi kone mein
main bas raha hoon, tumhari dhadkano mein, tumhari saanso mein
Main chup hi sahi, magar magroor nahin
Ek khamoshi hi sahi magar, koi shikwa nahin
Na tumse koi shikwa hai jaanam, na koi naraazgi
ye dil ka lagana hai jaanam, nahin koi dil lagi.....!!!
---
Sapna to bas sapna hai,
Sapno mein keya jeena,
Subha ki phali kiran sai seekho,
Is jeevan ko jeena.
---
Dil kai kone ko chordo,
hansti duniya mein aao,
kisi ko man ka meet banalo,
khushion kai phool khilao.
---
chupai huai magroor ko chordo,
chordo shkway narazee ko,
tord do pinjra - urd kar dhundo,
apnay jeewan sathi ko.
---
Na dekha karo tum humein, teerchhi nazaron se is tarah
ke jaan jaati hai jism se, neend aankhon se jis tarah
Aaankhein hai ye tumhari, ya shab e maikhana
main hosh jo kho doon, mujhe hosh mein na lana
Dekha jo tumne pyar se, wafa ka izhaar hua
paya jo tumhein zindgi mein, mohabbat ka ikraar hua
Khoya jo tumhein, ik aah nikli is dil se
dil ko jala gayi, ik bijli is dil se
Ab na aao khwaabon mein tum, kahin neend se na jagoon
main zinda hi kab tha, kahin maut se na jagoon.....!!
---
Zindgi mein to tumhari aa na sake, ab khwaabon mein chale aate hain
Tum laakh nazrein pher lo sanam, hum phir bhi chale aate hain
Kahne ko to tum bhul chuki thi, phir bhi anjaane mein pukarti ho
Tum kabhi bhuli nahin thi, sirf jaankar anjaane mein pukarti ho
Mann to mann hai, mann ko kya kahena
hum aayenge sapno mein, sapno ko kya kahena
---
Yaad rahe jaati hai, aur waqt guzar jata hai
Phool khilta hai aur khil ke bikhar jata hai,
Phool se kya gila, jab phool mein khushboo nahin
Apno se kya gila, jab apno mein mohabbat nahin,
Mohabbat na sahi, hum phir bhi jee lete hain
Zindgi zaher hi sahi, hum phir bhi pee lete hain....
---
bandagi hai khuda ki, khuda ka hai noor
heeron mein yeh heera hai, nooron mein kohinoor
kitno ko katl kiya isne, kitno ko kiya majboor
dilwlaon ka hai aasra, jab voh hote hain door
judai mein dilbar ki, yeh ban jaati hai nasoor
---
Kaise bataun mein kya chiz mohabbat hoti hai
pooncho yeh usse, jisko mohabbat hoti hai
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panw me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo jara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le zalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
---
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
---
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
---
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
---
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
---
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
chand ko sitoron se or mujhe tum se mohabbet hai
phoolon ko baharon se or mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
mefil main jo milna nighahen jhukalena
koi samajh na pai ke mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
ab tere hijr main bus ek kaam hai asman takna
tum sitaron pe likh dena mujhe tum se mohabbat
hai hamain ehsas hai tum ko bhi ham se pyaar hai lekin
yeh mere roohbarooh kehna mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
---
:Larkiyo Main Kia Rak..:
KATAL KERNA HAI TO KHANGER SAY KERO ,
TALWAAR MEIN KIYA REKHA HAI,
ISHQ KERNA HAI TO KHUDA SAY KERO ,
LERKIYON MEIN KIYA REKHA HAI..........!
PHOOLON KAY BAAGO MEIN MERA INTEZAR KERNA ,
MEIN NA AAO TO GADAY SAY PIYAAR KERNA.....!
CHAT PATI HALEEM MEIN LEEMBU NICHOR DUN,
DIL TO CHAHTA HAI TERA MU TOR DUN.....!
---
:Tafreeh:
Apni Zouja kay Taruf main kaha aik shaks nay
Dil say in ka mutarf hoon main zabani hi sahi
Chaye bhi achi banati hayn meri begam magar
Moo bananay main to in ka koi saani hi nahi
Jab say Aienak lagi nazroon wali
Zehar lagnay lagi hay ghar wali
Hay mezbaani ka ye takaza, kay aaye mehmaan to muskura do
Magar tabiyat ye chahti hay galay milo or gala daba do
Agar gussa hi karna hay to gussa is kadar karlo
Tumhara moon jidhar hay peeth bhi apni udhar karlo
---
:Larkiya:
hazaroo larkia asi ke har larki pay dam nikle
jis larki pay dam nikle wo larki ghar se kam nikle
phool kharab nahi hota makhia kharab karti hai
larka kharab nahi hota larkia kharab karti hai
himmat hai to duniya se bagawat karlo
warna jaha maabap bolay waha shaadi karlo
---
:Doobte ko tinkey ka:
doob te ko tinkay ka sahara chahye
shadi k liay behnon ka ek ishara chahye
hazar nuks nikalti hain larke k chahre main
koi pooche to un se kia sitara chahye
chaar shararon se baat nahi banne wali
saath main to un ko ek khatara chahye
behno! karo khayal kam hogaye hain baal
warna kahen ge woh larka hamen karara chahye
kitni bar kaha baaji larki hai yehi behter
mughay bhi to aakhir gunahon ka kuffara chahye
tum bhi sunlo larki walon yeh daastaaan
phir na kehna hamen interview doobara chahye
ab to reh guzar main aakay par gaya hoon
le jao jis ko bhi yeh baaboo bichara chahye
kion dikhayi larki walon ki itni sharafat jawed
woh kehte hain hamen larka thora aawara chahye
---
:Software Ke Phool:
Imagine Guru Dutt after working for few months in Software Industry would
make a movie "software kephool" & include this song:
yeh document, yeh meetings, yeh features ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman, cursors ki duniya
yeh deadlines ke bhooke, management ki duniya;
yeh Product agar ban bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Yahaan ek khilona hai programmer ki hasti
ye basti hai murda bug-fixers ki basti
yahaan par to raises hai, inflation se sasti
yeh Review agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
har ek keyboard ghayal, har ek login pyaasi
excel mein uljhan, winword mein udaasi
yeh office hai ya aalame microsoft ki
yeh Release agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
jalaa do ise, phoonk daalo yeh monitor
mere saamne se hataa daalo yeh modem
tumhaara hai tumhi sambhaalo yeh computer
yeh Product agar chal bhi jaaye to kya hai?
---
Apni aaisee wife ho,.
5'6" jiski height ho,
Jeans tight tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 27 ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
Sadak per sab kaheN kya cute ho,
Bhir me sab kaheN side ho, side ho,
Pindi, Islamabad ya Peshawar ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki khidmat jiski khwahish ho
Aisi apni Wife ho.
Padosi jab baat karay to haath me knife ho,
Dinner ke waqt candle light ho,
Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milnay ke baad dil delight ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
---
EK LADKA THA............
ek ladka tha dewana sa
net use kya karta tha
chori chori chopkay chopkay Email likha karta tha
messenger use kar na tha os ko
password hack honay say darta tha
jab bhi milta tha mujhsay...
mujsay poocha karta tha yeh password hack kesay hota hai
yeh password hack kesay hota hai........
aur main yeh hi keh pati theen..........
messenger khola ho ya band
password tu hack hota hai
kesay khahon main oo yaraa yeh password kesay hack hota hai .......
ajj hi yaroo kisi ko hack kar kay dhekhey gay hum
hacking hoti hai kesay kar kay dhekhey gay hum
kis kay messenger main add huway buddies ko hum nay choraliye
kisi kay inbox ki email hum nay oradiye
aay yaar net pay koi kisi ka na hota hai
kesay kahoon main oo yaraa yeh password kesay hack hota hai
kya yeh hai chatting ka jaduu jab koi sign in hota hai
block kar kay sub females kay peechay hota hai
door kaheen computer par banay ladkiyan kun janay koi hacker kab kesay kahan milay
jo asl chat pay hoo likha woo aksar hi jhot hota hai
kesay kahoon main oo yara yeh password kesay hack hota hai
---
FunnY Ashaars
neend mujhey raat bhar aati hai kam
shayad macharon ko bi mil gaya hai sanam
har pal mein sochta hon tum ko
kia karon koi aur kaam jo nehi hum ko
mein chahta hon tum koiss qadar
koi aur mil jaey tu dekhon naa mur kar
tujh bin zindagi ka tasawar hi nehi hai
tere sang ho zindagi aisa bi koi scene nehi hai
mohabbat hai mujh ko sirf tum sey sanam
sach keh raha hon mein tumhari qasam
jhot mein agar kahon tu, tu mar jaey
a kash mujh ko aishwarya mil jaey
iss dunya mein, tum he sab sey haseen ho
mein aur kahon jhot kitna, ke tum ko yaqeen ho
bas tere he sang jo meri zindagi
acha nehi ke mein kar lo khudhkoshi
rooz khawab mein nazar aatey ho tum
kio mujhey neend mein bi daratay ho tum
ab tu tere bin jeena ho gaya hai mushkil
haan ghar ke liye chahiye nokrani mustakil
dekho mujhey hai kitna pyar tum sey, ab tu haan karo
agar ab bi hai inkaar tu yeh letter agay pass karo
---
Aisa bhi nahi hai ke
I don't like your face
par dil ke storage mein
no more disk space
Ghar se jab tum nikale
pehen ke reshmi gown.
Jaane kitne dilon ka
ho gaya server down...
Jabse meri zindagi mein,
aayi hai ik female.
Bhool gaya hai sab kuchh
kya mailbox, kya e-mail...
Dil se ek ishq ki
application create kar raha hoon.
Pyaar se debug karna
mein wait kar raha hoon...
Tumhaare intezaar mein
neend aayee so gaya.
Yeh dekho mera connection
time out ho gaya...
Kal jab mile thhe
to dil mein hua ek sound.
Aur aaj mile to kehte hain
your file not found !
Jo muddat se hota aaya hai,
woh repeat kar doonga...
Tu naa mili to apni zindagi
ctrl+alt+delete kar doonga...
Shayad mere pyar ko
taste karna bhool gaye...
Dil sey aisa cut kiya
ke paste karna bhool gaye...
Laakhon honge nigaah mein
kabhi mujhe bhi pick karo...
Mere pyaar ke icon pe
kabhi to double-click karo...
Roz subha hum karte hain
pyar se unhe good morning...
Woh aise ghoor ke dekte hain
jaise 0 errors aur 5 warning...
Nazar mein to kai hain
aur shaayad lonely hain...
Problem yehi hai ki voh
ab read only hain...
---
mainay poocha chand say
dekha hai kahin maray yaar sa haseen
chand nay kaha
saale itnay upar say dikhta hai kya
Din ko chain nahi
Raat ko aram nahi.
Jee na lagay kahen
Aay khuda kya yahi pyar hai ?
Arey Pagal.. yeh pyar nahi ..... Aaj ka temperature 43
degree celcius hai.
My friend, the best quality that i like about u is that, U R very
sentimental .... (10% Senti and 90% Mental).
Dark were those days, without your sight.
When I was in darkness, you gave me light.
You gave me strength 2 make life bright.
Thank you so much PHILIPS TUBELIGHT
Khuda se Scooter manga.. Car di;
Apartment manga.. bangla diya;
dost manga to tumhain diya..
Khuda ne is bar aisa zulm kyoun kia
When I C the moon I C U
When I C the stars I C U
When I C the Sea I C U
Get out of the way you are blocking my view.
I mixed RUM in water and got drunk.
I mixed BRANDY in water and got drunk.
I mixed WHISKY in water and got drunk again.
Now I have decided never to drink water again !!!
Zindagi mein tum bohat aage jaaoo gay
kyonkay jahan bhi tum jaooge
sab kahain gay, chal be chal aagay chal.
FLATTERED...?. Don't Be, it was sent to me, I just wanted you to read it.
From Monday to Sunday
From January To December
From birth till my death
My feelings for you have never changed.
For me, you've always been........... a headache
---
*~ Type Of Girls ~*
HARD-DISK Girls:
She remembers everything, FOREVER.
RAM Girls:
She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.
WINDOWS Girls:
Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her.
SCREENSAVER Girls:
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!
INTERNET Girls:
Difficult to access.
SERVER Girls:
Always busy when you need her.
MULTIMEDIA Girls:
She makes horrible things look beautiful.
CD-ROM Girls:
She is always faster and faster.
E-MAIL Girls:
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.
VIRUS Girls:
Also known as "WIFE"; when you are not expecting her, she
comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don't try to
uninstall her you will lose everything............
---
When i Die , bury me deep
Ten feet down fast as leep
Place my Maths book on my head
Tell my teacher that i am dead
place my geography book on my chest
Tell my teacher how i am at rest
Place my physics in my right hand
Tell my teacher nothing i understand
place my english book on my left
Tell my teacher i tried my best
Also tell my teachers not to cry
For they are those who made me die
---
Two little babies were sitting in their cribs,
when one baby shouted to the other, "Are you a little girl or a
little boy?"
"I don't know," replied the other baby giggling.
"What do you mean, you don't know?" said the first baby.
"I mean I don't know how to tell the difference," was the reply.
"Well, I do," said the first baby chuckling, "I'll climb into your
crib and find out."
He carefully maneuvered himself into the other baby's crib,
then quickly disappeared beneath the blankets.
After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his
face.
"You're a little girl, and I'm a little boy," he said proudly.
"You're ever so clever," cooed the baby girl,
"but how can you tell?" "It's quite easy really," replied the baby
boy,
"you've got pink socks and I've got blue ones.
" SHAME ON YOU, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???
---
Larka:
Sochti Hai Zyada, Kam Woh Samajti Hai
Dil Kuch Kehta Hai, Kuch Aur Hi Karti Hai
Larki Kyon Na Jaane Kyon Larkon Si Nahin Hoti!
Pyaar Usse Bhi Hai Magar Shuruaat Tumhi Se Chahe
Khud Mein Ulji Ulji Hai Par Baalon Ko Suljaayein
Hum Achey Dost Hai Par Uss Nazar Se Tumko Dekha Nahin
Woh Sab To Teek Hai Par Uss Bare Mein Maine Socha Nahin
Sab Se Alag Ho Tum Yeh Ke Ke Paas Tumhaare Aaye
Aur Kuch Din Mein Tum Mein Alag Sa Kuch Bhi Na Usko Paye
Uff Yeh Kaisi Shirt Pehante Ho
Yeh Kaise Baal Katate Ho
Gaari Tez Chalate Ho
Tum Jaldi Mein Kyo Khaate Ho
Tumhe Badalne Ko Paas Woh Aati Hai
Tumhe Mitaane Ko jaal Bichati Hai
Baaton Baaton Mein Tumhe Phasati Hai
Pehle Hansati Hai, Phir Bara Rulaati Hai
Larki Kyon Na Jaane Kyon Larkon Si Nahin Hoti!
Larki:
Eh Itna Hi Khudh Se Khush Ho To Peeche Kyon Aate Ho
Phool Kabhi To Hazar Tohfe Akhir Kyon Laate Ho
Apna Naam Nahin Bataya Aapne
Coffee Peene Chalenge
Main Aapko Ghar Chor Doon
Phir Kab Milen ge
Bikhra Bikhra Be Matlab Sa Toota Phoota Jeena
Aur Kehte Ho Alag Se Hain Hum Taan Ke Apna Seena
Bheega Tolya Kahin Farsh Pe
Toothpaste Ka Dakhan Kahin
Kal Ke Mauze Ulat Ke Pehne
Waqt Ka Khuch Bhi Hosh Nahin
Jeena Ka Tumko Dhang Sikhlati Hai
Tumhe Jaanwar Se Insaan Banaati Hai
Uske Bina Ek Pal Rehna Sakoge Tum
Usko Pata Hai Yeh Keh Na Sakoge Tum
Iss Liye Larkiya, Larko Si Nahin Hoti
Larka:
Jane Kon Kon Se Din Wo Tumko Yaad Dilaye
Pyaar Ko Chahe Bhool Bhi Jaaye
Taareekhein Na Bhoolaye
First March Ko Nazar Milaayee
Chaar April Ko Main Milne Aayee
Ikees May Ko Tumne Chuwa Tha
Chey June Muje Kuch Huwa Tha
Larki:
Larko Ka Kya Hai Kissi Bhi Mor Pe Woh Mur Jaayein
Abhi Kissi Ke Hai Abhi Kissi Aur Se Woh Jur Jaayein
Tumhaare Mummy Daddy Ghar Par Nahin Hai
Great... Main Aaa Jaon?
Tumhaari Friend Akeli Ghar Jaa Rahi Hai
Bechari... Main Chod Aaon... UFFFF
Larka:
Ek Haan Kehne Ko Kitna Tehlati Hai
Thak Jaate Hai Hum Woh Jee Behlati Hai
Larki:
Woh Sharmati Hai Kabhi Chupati Hai
Larki Jo Haan Kehde Usse Nibhati Hai
Iss Liye Larkiya, Larko Si Nahin Hoti
Larka:
Alright Alright Iss Mein Jagarne Ki Kya Baat Hai Yaar
Larki:
Pehle Pehle Bhanawre Jaise Aas Paas Mandlaye
Phir Busy Hoon Keh kar Tumko Woh Tarkaye
Samja Karo Darling Aaj Bohat Kaam Hai
Door Hua To Kya Dil Mein Tumhaara Naam Hai
Jiss Chehre Par Marte Hai Woh Boring Ho Jaaye
Kuch Hi Din Mein Nazrein Inki Idhar Udhar Mandlain
Sirf Pyaar Se Zindagi Nahin Chalti
Tum Interior Decoration Ka Course Kyon Nahin Karti
kyoon kaise lagi larka larki k darmyaan nok jhok bye
---
DeAr FriEnDs!!!
MUNNA HAI KIYA???
Call an unknown phone number and ask, "Munna hai kya?"
{Whoever picks up the phone} will say, " No wrong number".
Again call after five-min, "Munna hai kya?"
She will reasonably be annoyed and say, "No this is wrong number".
Again call, "Munna aa gaya kya?"
She will say, "Aap ka dimaagh kharaab hai kya?! Kiyun peechhay paray ho?!"
Again call after five-min, " Munna ko phone dena."
She will cry with all ‘gaaleees’.
Then you just drop the phone.
Call after another five-min,
"Main Munna bol raha hoon, mera koi phone to nahi aya na?
---
Makan Malik: Sir 500 Kiraya hoga.
Kirayedar : Theek Hai, Par Aap ke Makaan Mein Chuhey Nach Rahen Hain.
Makan Malik: Abey Uloo, 500 Mein Chuhey Nahi To Kya Urmila Nachegi
Wife: Mere Irade Bade Nek Hai, Aap 1000 Mein Ek Hain...
Sardar: Mera Dimag Bada Tez Hai, Pehle Yeh Bata, Baki 999 Kaun Hai...
Basanti: Bhag Dhanno Aaj Teri Basanti Ki Izzat Ka Sawaal Hai.
Dhanno : Teri Izzat Gayi bhaa mai mere peeche gabbar ke ghore pare hai
Aaj kal dil chah raha hai ki main tumhe kabhi bhi mauka dekh ke sab ke
samne 1 ki ki kis kiss kissa sunau
Log kahete hai ki Ladkiyan zindgi hoti hai, Maut nahi...
Magar woh log yeh kyu bhul jate hai ki, dhokha bhi zindgi hi deti hai, maut nahi....
Boy : Jaan-e-man... is dil me aaja na!
Girl : Sandal nikalu kya?
Boy : Pagli, yeh masjid nahi hai aise hi aaja
ek tum ho jo iTNey acchey ho,
ek tum ho jo kitney pyarey ho,
ek tum ho jo kitney sundar ho,
ek tum ho jo chand sitare ho,
Aur ek hum hain, jo jooth boley jaa rahey hain...
Woh gori hai uski zulfen hain kali,
Wo Pari hai ya Pariyo ki Rani,
Uski har baat hai nirali,
Par kya karu yaaro wo larki kisi aur ne pata li!
Chaand ko garoor hai ki uske paas noor hai,
to kya hua....
Mujhe bhi garoor hai ki mera Dost Langoor hai!
ha ha ha ha!!!!
Har Karz dosti ka ada kon karega,
Jab hum na rahe to dosti kon karega,
ae khuda mere dosto ko salamat rakhna,
Warna meri shaadi mein dance kon karega??
Aahat si koi aye to lagta hai ki tum ho.
Hawa koi lehrayi to lagta hai ki tum ho.
Ab tum hi batao, kya tum kisi BHOOT se kam ho ?
Dabbay mein dabba...Dabbay mein Khargosh !
Larki ne ankh mari larka behosh !!!
Humne bhi pyar kiya tha zindgi main,badi joshh ke sath !
Humne bhi pyar kiya tha zindgi main,badi shhor ke sath !
Aab hum pyar karenge badi soch ke sath !
Kyon ki usey kal shaamko dekha kisi aur ke sath
Ghunghat Mein Tujhe Dekha To Deewana Hua,
Sangeet Ka Taraana Hua,
Shamaa Ka Parwana Hua,
Masti Ka mastaana Hua,
Jaise Hi Ghunghat Uthaya Is Duniya Se Ravana Hua
Ek Ladki Ko Dekha To Aisa Laga
Doosri Ladki Ko Dekha To Vaisa Laga
Jab Dono Ke Joote Lage...To Ek Jaisa Laga!!!
Bewafa Tum Ho To Wafadaar Hum Bhi Nahi,
Besharam Tum Ho To Sharamdaar Hum Bhi Nahi,
Pyaar Ke Is Mode Par Aake Kehte Ho Shadi shuda Ho
To Kya Hua Darling...Kunware Hum Bhi Nahin!
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Ye line samajh me aaye to mujhe zaroor batana
---
Short jokes
Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
Son : Well, where did you get mummy then?
---
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask I can take this train to Kuala Lumpur.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
---
Peter : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Kirk : Yes it's really strange. I' ve got another pair of the same at home.
---
Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.
---
Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Penang in two days time?
Post Master : Well it might do.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Johor.
---
Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first
---
kon kheta hai khe hum,piyar mai pakree jaye ge
waqat ane per bhen bhai ban jaye ge
tere husan ke kiya tarief karoo bander jesa tera mooon
tere zulfoo ke kiya kehne tere ek ke bal pee joon
haate ne kaha hatniee ke kaber pee ja ker
sadkyy jaoo terye patle kamer per
tum bhe bee sahara hum bhe bee shara
fitye mooon tumhara fitye humara
dil ke armaa ansuoo mai bhe gaye
un ke bachee hume mamo khe gaye
ishaq ke smander mai guta lgaya
ppane buhat thanda tha mai bahir nikal aya
in ke galee se ghuzre ajab itfaq tha
unhoo ne phool phenka gamla bhe sath tha
---
ARZO=
rang khusboo,gulab dee mugh ki
iss dwa mai ajab aser aya
mai ne pholoo ke arzoo ke the
ankh mai motiya uter aya
---
Colleg mai=
professer he jab ate hoo hafta war colleg mai
tu uncha kiun na hoo taleem ka miyaar colleg mai
ager chhe dusre mashroob bhe mehnge nahe milte
mager chalta hai akser sharbaat dedar colleg mai
wo degree ke bjaye maimm le ker lott aya hai
mila tha dakhla jis ko samander par colleg mai
mughe daar hai khe kahe donno kahe samdhee na ban jaye
mera gunar colleg mai tera gulzar colleg mai
---
Akkabee rooh=
edher jhiptee udher palte usee jakraa usee pakra
lahoo ko garam rakhne ke bhanee hai urranoo mai
her ek larkenazar ate hai in ko fakhta jese
"akkabe ruhh jab bedar hote hai jawanoo mai"
---
Drawing=
ahh bherte hoee aye ho"slming senter"
"ah ko chahye ek umer aser honee tak"
"drawing"khel nahe chand dinoo ka begam
eek sade chahiye kamre ko kamer hone tak
---
Gham zada haseena=
kiun bhujate hoo diya ulfat ka phooka mar ke
chahta hai dil mera ro waa mai koka mar ke
---
Choote=
mere mehbobiyat mai agaye ik geer muslim bhe
ye socha ha khe de doo iss rukh gunar ko choote
mager msayeel ye hai mulaqat iss se kese hoo
mughe jumee ko milte hai usee etwar ko choote
---
Jald Baze=
zara isee jald baze ke bdoolat
tumhara sab ujala khoo giya na
kaha se laye ho kale see bewee
andhera he andhera ho giya na
---
BOLTA HAI=
muun mai rakh ke paan jo bolta hai
jane kese zuban bollta hai
hum bhe bolle gay iss terha pashtoo
jese urdu pathan bolta hai
wo jo ullo tha urrh giya kab ka
ab u khale makan bolta hai
call usee ke tu ye sdda aye
hum tera abba jaan bolta hai
---
LAFFAFA=
laffafa khubsurat or dilkash tha jo kal pohncha
wo kertass hasseen dil se lga lene ke kabil tha
mai samjha tha mere mariyam ne mugh ko yaad farmaya hai
lapak ker jaab usee khoola tu dekha gess ka bill tha
---
Lasane znanee=
apne zoja ke taruof mai kaha ek shakhas ne
dil see unn ka matruff hoo mai zubane he nahe
chaye bhe achee bnate hai mere begaam mager
muun bnane mai tu un ka koye sane he nahe
---
Kttaa=
"sahab zadee karte kiya hai?"larke waloo ne pucha
"jab dekhoo farigh phirtee hai ya petee tambakoo hai"
larke ke ama ye bolee...kam kare uss ke jotee
"doo bhai bhatta lete hai, aba kher se dakoo hai!"
---
HISTORY=
choor litreature ko apne history ko bhool ja
shekh-o-masjid se taluq turq ker school ja
char din ke zindgee hai,kofaat se faeeda
kha double rote,klarkee ker,khushee se phool ja
---
POLICE=
kiya kramat hai guftugoo mai police waloo ke
wo parsaoo ko bhe gunhegar bna det hai
in ke lathee mai hai bangaal ka jadoo
joo goongee ko bhe gulokar bna deta hai
---
Fane khrabe=
ishaq mai fane khrabe ke sabab
munkata he ho giya sab silsila
is terha tuta hai un se wasta
jis terha T.V mai tutte rabtee
---
Hassab Kitaab=
mile jo pheli ko tankhwa race mai hare
"gunwaa ke aya kaha hai mughe jawab tu de"
kaha bewee ne jal ker"ye ke hai kiss ke nazar?
tuu pesee girne nahe deta na de hassab tu de"
---
Jhoota Mehboob=
tum rakh sake na pass zara apne koul ka
iss baar bhe badal gaye her baar ke terha
wada kiya tha raat ko ane ka per na aye
jhoote ho tum bhe sham ke akhbar ke terha
---
Bayaq Waqat=
edher hum se mehfill mai nazree larana
udher geer ko dekh ker muskrana
ye bhengee nazar ka na ho shakhsana
"kahe pe nigahee" "kahe pe nishana"
---
Mamoo=
na kam muhabbat ka her ik dukh sehna
her hal mai anjam se derte rehna
qudraat ka bara intkam hai jede
mehbooba ke ullad ka "Mamoo"khena!
---
Modren Ishaq=
or bhe cheeze buhat se luut chuke hai dil ke sath
ye btaya dostoo ne ishaq fermane ke baad
iss liye kamre ke ik ik cheez check kerta hoo mai
"ik tere ane see pehle ik tere jane ke baad"
---
^^**Mehngaye**^^
sab ke nazroo e giraya mughe mehngaye ne esa dewana bnaya mughe mehngaye ne
mere joore ke slaye mere biwee ne ke ye bhe ejaz dekhaya mughe mehngaye ne
her kadam per rah hastee mai muhabbat ke ik niya roog lagaya mughe mehngaye ne
kuch tu gurbaat ne mera chenn curaya yaroo or kuch naach nachaya mughe mehngaye ne
kabhe lela ke muhabbat ne uraye the hoosh aj dewaan bnaya mughe mehngaye ne
doodh wale ne gere baan mera phar diya ye tammasha bhe dekhaya mehngaye nee
saal bhe farme murghee ke siwaa khane mai or kuch bhe na khalaya mughe mehngaye ne
jese bachee kise pagal ko satayee saqib raat din esee staya mughe mehngaye ne
---
Woh bhi kiya Din thay
jab ham Jin:@ ) thay
Ab ham dayo hain
Jin k payo hain
---
tu mere dil mai ese smayee.........
jese bajree ke khet mai bhenss ghuss aye hai
galib ne likha dewar per lal rang se
yaha likhna manna hai...............
jab pearat kachree mai gira...sparoow bole
koye baat nahe...(Surf excel)hai na..............
majnoo lela ke baall paker ke bola......
moeee kitne din se sir nahe dhoya......
hum ap ke dil mai rehte hai.......
or kraya bhe nahe detee........
tum ko dekha tu ye khiyal aya..........
khe kal raat ko mai ne etna kiun khaya......
aee husan ke malka or bharoo ke shan
jese jawan...jese kisan.....
---
(*) Safaid kapre per se Rooshnaii walai dhabbe ki jaga ko kenchi se kaat dein..daagh hamesha keliye door hujai ga !!!
(*) Shakker ki booriu per Lafz "Namak" likh dene se woh chiontion se mehfooz rehti hai..
(*) Plastic ke berten per dhabbe per jain..tu is berten ko jalte hue chulai per rakh dene se dhabba berten samaid khatam
hujain gen..
(*) Nakhunon ko her rooz pandra minute tak reti se ragerne ke bad namak ka taizaab dalne se woh khoobsurat aur chamakdar
hujate hain..
(*) Pakai hue Salan main Sabun ki ek tikia dalne se Salen kabhi khatam na huga..Aur khushboo daar hujai ga..Sabun bashertyeke
Imported hu..
(*) Kacche rangon walai kapre agr bager Paani ke dhoyen tu inke raang kabhi nahin uterte..
---
READ N ENJOY!
1)
The night was dark, the moon was high,
I stopped my car....u wondered why?
I leant so close, u felt shy.
I uttered those three words....
I ......la.......puncture !!
2)
Friends r like mirrors, they r our reflection.
You r damn lucky I look good !!!!
3)
You = cute
You = hot
You = sweet
You = intelligent
You = amazing
You = perfect
Me = liar.
4)
I have a confession to make, ever since I have known u,
Its kinda hard for me to forget u.
Every night u appear in my dreams, And I find my self shouting.....
BHOOT !!! BHOOT !!!
5)
I look at the stars, the stars r beautiful
Then I look at you......
I ......
I .......
I rather look at the stars again. *****
6)
Look at the world as one big chocolate cake.
It would never be complete without few sweets n nuts.
Sweets like ME and nuts like YOU.
7)
U r 100% beautiful, u r 100% lucky
u r 100% sweet , u r 100% nice, and u r 100% stupid to believe these words
8)
Good looking people r hard to find.
That's why u don't ......
That's y u don't see me often.
9)
A good speech should b like a women's skirt...
Long enough to cover the subject,
And short enough to create interest.
10)
When u feel sad....
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say, "damn I am really sooo cute" u will overcome ur sadness.
But don't make this a habit.....
Coz liars go to hell !!!!
---
Difference between boys and girls while using ATM
(Bank's cash dispenser machines)
Boys:
1. Drive to the bank, park and go to the Cash
Dispenser.
2. Insert card
3. Dial code and desired amount
4. Take the cash, the card and the slip
Girls:
1. Drive to the bank
2. Engine stalled
3. Check make-up in the mirror
4. Apply perfume
5. Manually check haircut
6. Park the car - failure
7. Park the car - failure
8. Park the car - Success
9. Search for the card in the handbag
10. Insert card, rejected by the machine
11. Throw phone card back in handbag,
12. Look for bank card.
13. Insert Card
14. Look for Secret Box (where secret code is written)
in Handbag
15. Enter code
16. Study instructions for 2 minutes
17. #Cancel#
18. Re-enter code
19. #Cancel#
20. Call Boyfriend/husband to get correct the code
21. Enter desired amount
22. #Error#
23. Enter bigger amount
24. #Error#
25. Enter maximum amount
26. Cross fingers
27. Take cash
28. Go back to the car
29. Check make up in rear mirror
30. Look for keys in handbag
31. Start car
32. Drive 50 meters
33. STOP
34. Drive back to bank machine
35. Go out of the car
36. Take card and ticket back from machine
37. Go back to the car
38. Throw card on passenger seat
39. Throw slip on the floor
40. Check make up in rear mirror
41. Manually check haircut
42. Go into roundabout - wrong way
43. BRAKE
44. Go into roundabout - right way
45. Drive 5 kilometers
46. Remove hand brake
47. Call boyfriend/husband to tell how miserable she
was because of HIM.
Sorry girls, if umind
---
Shaadi ke Pehle / Shaadi ke Baad
Shaadi ke Pehle
Agar Tum Hotey
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Agar Tum Na Hotey
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Maine Pyar Kiya
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Ye Maine Kya Kiya?
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Kuch Nahi Hota Hai
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Dil To Pagal Hai
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Dil To Pagal Tha
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Ek Duje Ke Liye
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Chandramukhi
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Jwaalamukhi
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kuwara Baap
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Bechara Baap
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Titanic
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Mortgage
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Hum Aapke Hain Koun?
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Barbadi Key Kaaran
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Yes Boss
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Yes Boss
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Mere Sapnoon Ki Rani
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Chutki Ki Amma
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kabhi Kabhi
--
Shaadi ke Baad
If You Are Lucky
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Aao Pyar Karen
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Aur Bhi Kuch Kaam Karain
---
kaisay bataoon key tum merai kaun hoo,
walls ki ice cream ho polka ki kon ho,
kesey bataoon key tum poorani dheet ho aik bohat bari phateek ho ,
tum orangi tum korangi tum hi ho meri nagan chowrangi ,
liyari ki tum Football ho kimari ka tum bund ho manora ki tum thand ho,
tum kharadar tum methadar tum hi meray liye goolimar ho
tumhi meri dhoti aur shalwar ho ,
tum hi gutka tum hi mempoori tum hi mix patti ka pan ho
kaisey bataon tumhay key tum meri koon ho
lalookhait main rehti ho tum khud ko defence ka kheti ho tum
lambi lambi chorti ho tum, hamesha sey ho khowar tum ,
ho sardi ka bhokhar tum shikarpur ka achar tum peshawar ki naswar tum
aur PIA ka jahaz ho jo kabhi waqt par nahi milti
wo parwaz ho jo hamesha short rehti hai wo piyas ho
mahengai kay is dor mey sawa rupey ki niyaz ho ,
aur mera aghaz tum mera anjam tum mera public evening special mera parcham
mera awaam tum ,
tum hi jurat ,tum hi ummat ,tum hi jasarat ,tum hi nowaey waqt , jang ho
aman ho,
the news ho ya dawn ho kesey batao key tum meri kon ho ,
key main rokta bus tum ko hoon, main tookta bus tum ko hooon,
tum hi mera kal thin ,tum hi mera aaj ho ,
tum hi marshallah ,tum hi jamhoriat , tum hi governer raj ho
aur meri TT tum ,mera Repeater tum ,mera Rokket Lunchar tum ,
tum hi meri soch ho meray paaon ki moch ho aur 9 rupees wali kouch ho
aur vespa main tum aur rakshey main tum, taxi main tum ,mazda main tum,
truck main tum troller main tum ,meri honda 50 tum, meri 70 tum,
lahore ka tanga ho tum, sukhur ki suzuki ho tum
aur kya bataoon meri jaan tum meray liya kya ho
arey tum tu pora PAKISTAN ho karachi ki jaan ho aur W11 ki paihchan ho
kaisay bataoon key tum meray liye koon ho
---
HAREE MIRCHEE
---------------------
@=ager muhabbat andhee hote hai tu shade kiya hai?..............(ankhoo ka operastion)
@=dil ka dora parne se dulhaa halak ho giya?................(ghoot ghoot ker jene se achanaak mer jana behter hai)
@=ek khatoon do meel pedal chal ker niya record kayeem kiya?.........(shoping center ke nam per chale ho ge)
@=kiya tum shade ke baad bhe itna piyaar karoo ge?........(shade kiya hai..mai tu tum se talaaq lene ke baad bhe itna piyaar
karoo ge)
@=her khud kushee ke pechee akhree hath orrat ka he nikle ga.
@=3 cheezoo se hamesha hoshiyar rahe(saamp,dushmaan,make up).
@=boy subhoo khirkee dekhte hai or girls ayeena(mirror)
@=mard bechare kiya kare jab fashtioneeorrtoo ke ankhoo mai saff likha hoo"lift plz".
@=in nojwanoo ka kon persaan hai jin se tohfee btoor btoor ker larkiya inhee kangaal ker dete hai.
@=duniya apne mehwaar per ruk sakte hai lekin apne nomayesh se baaz nahe a sakte.
@=azade naswaa ke baad ab hamee mardoo ke hakook ke khatir azadee merdaa ke tehreek chalana ho gee.
@=ek orrat ziyada se ziyada ek mard ka mustaqbil bna sakte hai or na kaam -o-namuraad bayaak waqat kayee ko sakte hai.
---
AP PUCHEE HUM BTAYEE
------------------------------
@=ager kisee ko dekh ker dil dharkna bhool jaye tu?.......(fiker maat kare idhee center ke phone sab ko zubane yaad hai).
@=khub surat larkiya ehmaak kiun hote hai?........(khub suraat is liye khe ap ko ache lagte hai ,or ehmaak ise liye khe ap
ache nahe lagte).
@=shade or khud koshe mai kiya fark hai?......(ziyada nahe' bus khud kushee mai insan forran maar jata hai).
@=shehnayee ke awaz mai dard kiun hota hai?........(dulhee ko khaber daar kerne ke liye'lekin is ko hoosh kaha hota hai).
@=orrat ke mohabbat mai mard ne TAJ MEHAL banwaya'merd ke mohabbat mai orrat ne kiya banwaya?........(banwaya nahe
banyaeee'kabristaan').
---
Why I am not studying???
Because :
No Study = Fail ....................... ( I )
Study = No Fail ...................... ( II )
By Combining ( I ) & ( II ) :
=====> ( No Study + Study ) = ( No Fail + Fail )
By Taking ( Study ) as a common factor in the left hand side
And Taking ( Fail ) as a common factor in the right hand side
=====> Study ( No + 1) = Fail (No + 1 )
By Dividing both sides by ( No + 1)
=====> Study = Fail
SO I ADVISE YOU TO STOP STUDING
---
1) Tujhe Dekha to yeh jana sanam ,
Pyar hota hai dewana sanam.
Kafia
Tujhe Dekha to yeh jana sanam ,
Chahiye roz ghis ghis ke nahana sanam.
---
2) Kabhi to nazar milao,
kabhi to kareeb aao,
jo nahi kaha hai,
kabhi to samajh bhi jao.
Kafia
Kabhi to naha ke aoo,
kabhi to perfume lagao,
kitna baar kaha hai,
mere paas na aaao.
---
3) Humain aur jeene ki chahat na hoti,
agar tum na hote , agar tum na hote.
Kafia
Humain aur nahane ki zaroorat na hoti
agar tum na hote, agar tum na hote
---
4) Kabhi Kabhi mere dil main khayal aata hai,
ke jaise tujh ko banaya gaya hai mere liye,
Kafia
Kabhi kabhi mere dil main khayal aata hai,
yeh Maths ka paper kyun har saal ata hai
---
5) Sanwali si ek ladki,
dhadkan jaise dil ki,
dekhe jis ke woh sapne,
kahin woh main to nahi!!
Kafia
Moti se ek ladki,
kamar jaise bhens ki,
dekhe jis ke woh sapne,
kahin woh main to nahi (Are baap re)
---
6) Tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi,
tere bina zinagi bhi lekin, zindagi to nahi,
Kafia
Tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi,
tere bina ladkion ki kami bhi, to nahi (Bahaut hain jan00)
---
7) Aa bhi ja , Aa bhi ja,
Ae subha aa bhi ja,
Rat ko kar wida,
Dil ruba aa bhi ja.
Kafia
Aa bhi ja, Aa bhi ja,
Date pe aa bhi ja,
Doosre BFs ko kar wida,
jan00 aa bhi ja (Aati hai ke nahi)
---
8) Natu ae gi na hi chen aaye ga,
mere angan ki hari belon ka ab patta patta sookhta jae ga.
Kafia
Na tu ae gi , Na hi chen ae ga,
mere Server ke mehenge hours ka ab rupiya rupiya doobta jae ga (Online ho
ja ab)
---
9) Aap ke pyar main hum sanwarne lage,
dekh ke aap ko hum nikharne lage,
is qadar aap se mohabbat hui,
toot ke bazuon main bikharne lage.
Kafia
Aap ke pyar main hum Bigadne lage,
Dekh ke aap ko hum bhi cigarette, peene lage,
Is qadar aap se hum ko mohabbat hui,
apne abba se roz ladke lage
---
10) Hum kyun chalen us rah par ,
jis rah par sab hi chalen,
kyun na chunen woh rasta,
jis par nahi koi gaya.
Kafia
Hum kyun chalen us jagah par,
jis jaga par cheezien mehengi milen,
kyun na jaeen aisi jaga,
jahan bache apna ruipya.
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panoo me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo zara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka pc kiya hai chaaloo
Apne dil ke hard disk pe aur kitani files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hai jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhate hai
Warna aap jaise softwares to bazaar main bikte hai
Roz raat aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ka mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko lubhataa hai
Par bicch main tere baap ka virus aa jataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ke site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apne insult ka badalaa dekho kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko shift delete kar doonga
Aapke ke nakhare apne dil pe bang ho gaye
Do pc joodte joodte hang ho gaye
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le jalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
.
---
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
---
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
---
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
---
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
---
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
jo sadiyaon se hota aaya hai
woh repeat kar doonga
tu naa mili to tujhko dil sey
Ctrl+Alt+delete kar doonga
---
company kee ladkiyaan sunder hain
aur lonely hain
problem ye hai ki bus voh
read only hain
---
shayad mere pyar ko taste
karna bhool gaye
dil sey aisa cut kiya
ke paste karna bhool gaye
---
woh samajhte hain dil tod diya
to hum dead hain
woh nahin jaante ki is dil main
aur kitne thread hain
---
tumhare samne hain itney item
kabhi hamein bhi pick karo
hamare pyar ke icon pe
kabhi to tum double click karo
---
roz subha hum karte hai
itne pyar se unhe good morning
woh humhe ghoor kar dekhte hain
jaise 0 error but 5 warning
---
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
---
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
---
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
I am a girl, why not a boy? I play with books and study about toys. I fly on the earth and walk in the sky. Yesterday night,I
saw a sun. In the morning,I ate a gun. I am beautiful but seems ugly, all my friends call me lovely. My friend's name is
Bina, I call her Tina. I know English but in Urdu, I met a Christian but he was a Hindu.
---
Ajj anwer dafattan khayal aya hai us murgh ka shorrba piiney key bad aur bootian khaney key bad allah allah ek berqi sard
khaney key tufail us ney kitni umer pai zibah hu janey key baad
---
Kuch aisa kar duniya mein kadardaan meherbaan jis gali sey guzrey awaz aaye abba jaan abba jan
---
Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaeen gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaeen gay
Teray husn ki kia taareef karoo?tera bander jaisa mu
Teri zulfo ki kia tareef karoo?teray ek ek baal pe joon
Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain
Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo,tum ko sawab ho ga
---
Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Jalti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jiyen gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.
---
Ghar se roz jata hai wo, Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap, Sab ko hi satata hai wo
Hathi nay kaha ja kar hathni ki kabar per
Sadqay jaoo tumhari patli kamar per
Tum bhi becahara,hum bhi becahara
Fittay mu tumhara,fittay mu hamara
Hum nay usay dekha angle badal kar
Us nay hamay mara sandle badal kar
Dil kay armaa aanso'oo may bah gaye
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kah gaye
Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar
Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh
Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen
Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya
Un ki gali say guzray,ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha
Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalaak hai,mangi thallay war jaeen gay
Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi
Mera dil para hai loose Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes
"Sahib Zaday kiya karte hain" Larki Waloon ne poocha
"Jab dekho farigh phirte hain ya tambako pite hain"
Larkay ki amman yeh bolin....kam kare us ki joti
"do bhai bhatta lete hain--abba khair se daku hain"
nakam muhabbat ka har eik dukh sehna..
.har haal main anjam se darte rehna
Qudrat ka barra anjam hai jaidi........
mehbooba ki olad ka "mamoon" kehna!
---
Rab na dikhaye
Tooba Tooba!
nanga pinda
nanga sina
bara kam33na
Dish Antena
---
Ishq main fanni kharabi...........Munqata hi ho geya saab silsila
Is tarha toota hai un se wasta....jis tarha T.V main toote rabta
---
Rat ka waqt hai or masjid hai qareeb
uthiye jaldi se ke peghame amal laya hoon
ghar main hain filhal jitne bhi purane jote
aap bhi jake badal lain main badal aya hoon
or bhi chizain lut chuki hain dil ke sath
yeh batayen doston ne ishq farmane ke baad
is liye kamre ki eik eik chiz check karta hoon main
" eik tere ane se pehle eik tere jane ke baad"
bhains rakhne ka takalluf hamse ho sakta nahin
ham ne sokhe doodh ka dabba jo hai rakha hua
ghar main rakhain ghair mehrm ko mulazim kis liye
kam karne ke liye abba jo hai rakha hua
---
Utha kar phool ki patti, nazaakat se masal daali
Ishaarey se kaha Hum dil "Aisa" haal kartey hain
dil karta hai keh uss kay nazook hontoon koo chuum loonnnnn
magar uss kee behteee hooyee naak nay meraa iradaa hee badal diyaaa
chandni chand se hogi to sitaroon ka kiya ho ga
mohabbat eik se hogi to hazaroon ga kiya ho ga
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka computer kiya hai chaaloo
Aab main dil ki hard disk pe aur kitni files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hain jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhte hain
Warna aap jaise kitney hi softwares bazaar main bikte hain
Roz raat ko aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ko mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachaate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko Lubhataa hai
Par beech main tere baap ka virus aataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ki site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apni insult ka badalaa dekhna main kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko Shift Delete kar doonga
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut ker diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
---
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
Toot Jaate Hain Sabhi Rishte Magar
Dil Se Dil Ka Rishta Apni Jagah
Dil Ko Hai Tujh Se Na Milne Ka Yaqeen
Tujh Se Milne Ki Dua Apni Jagah
Mast Nazron se dekh lenaa tha..
Agar tamanna thi Aazmane ki..
Hum to Behosh Yun hi ho jaate..
Kya zaroorat thi muskurane ki..
Chehrey Per Banawat Ka Gussa,
Aankhon Say Chalakta Pyar Bhi Hai,
Is Shauq-E-Ada Ko Kya Kahiye
Inkar Bhi Hai Iqraar Bhi Hai.
---
Raat bhar jaagi ho jiske sapno mein,
kaise kho gaya wo raat ke andhero mein,
Dhoondti rahi tum mujhe, dil ke kisi kone mein
main bas raha hoon, tumhari dhadkano mein, tumhari saanso mein
Main chup hi sahi, magar magroor nahin
Ek khamoshi hi sahi magar, koi shikwa nahin
Na tumse koi shikwa hai jaanam, na koi naraazgi
ye dil ka lagana hai jaanam, nahin koi dil lagi.....!!!
---
Sapna to bas sapna hai,
Sapno mein keya jeena,
Subha ki phali kiran sai seekho,
Is jeevan ko jeena.
Dil kai kone ko chordo,
hansti duniya mein aao,
kisi ko man ka meet banalo,
khushion kai phool khilao.
chupai huai magroor ko chordo,
chordo shkway narazee ko,
tord do pinjra - urd kar dhundo,
apnay jeewan sathi ko.
---
Na dekha karo tum humein, teerchhi nazaron se is tarah
ke jaan jaati hai jism se, neend aankhon se jis tarah
Aaankhein hai ye tumhari, ya shab e maikhana
main hosh jo kho doon, mujhe hosh mein na lana
Dekha jo tumne pyar se, wafa ka izhaar hua
paya jo tumhein zindgi mein, mohabbat ka ikraar hua
Khoya jo tumhein, ik aah nikli is dil se
dil ko jala gayi, ik bijli is dil se
Ab na aao khwaabon mein tum, kahin neend se na jagoon
main zinda hi kab tha, kahin maut se na jagoon.....!!
---
Zindgi mein to tumhari aa na sake, ab khwaabon mein chale aate hain
Tum laakh nazrein pher lo sanam, hum phir bhi chale aate hain
Kahne ko to tum bhul chuki thi, phir bhi anjaane mein pukarti ho
Tum kabhi bhuli nahin thi, sirf jaankar anjaane mein pukarti ho
Mann to mann hai, mann ko kya kahena
hum aayenge sapno mein, sapno ko kya kahena
---
Yaad rahe jaati hai, aur waqt guzar jata hai
Phool khilta hai aur khil ke bikhar jata hai,
Phool se kya gila, jab phool mein khushboo nahin
Apno se kya gila, jab apno mein mohabbat nahin,
Mohabbat na sahi, hum phir bhi jee lete hain
Zindgi zaher hi sahi, hum phir bhi pee lete hain....
---
bandagi hai khuda ki, khuda ka hai noor
heeron mein yeh heera hai, nooron mein kohinoor
kitno ko katl kiya isne, kitno ko kiya majboor
dilwlaon ka hai aasra, jab voh hote hain door
judai mein dilbar ki, yeh ban jaati hai nasoor
Kaise bataun mein kya chiz mohabbat hoti hai
pooncho yeh usse, jisko mohabbat hoti hai
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panw me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo jara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le zalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Something to take you to Flash back - Inspired by Jagit Singh
yeh degree bhi lelo ye naukari bhi lelo
Bhale Chheen lo mujhse US ka Visa
magar mujhko lauta do college ki canteen
vo kam chaay ka pani vo teeKha samosaa
college ki canteen me hum sab the raja,
vo chaayvaalaa jise saare kehte the Khawja
vo Kahwja ke hathon ki 'bi2' chaay meethee
vo chupkese journal mein bheji hui chitthi
vo padhtehi chiththi uska tilmilaanaa
vo chehre ki laali vo aankhon ka gussaa...
kadi dhoop mein apne ghar se nikalnaa
vo project ki Khatir shahar bhar bhataknaa
vo lecture mein doston ki proxy lagaanaa
vo sar ko chidhanaa ,vo aeroplane udaanaa
vo submission ki raton ko jagnaa jagaanaa
vo orals ki khahani vo Lab-on ka kissaa....
bimaari ka detention ke time bahanaa
vo doosron ke assignments ko apnaa banaanaa
vo seminar ke din pairoka chhatpatanaa
vo workshop mein din raat pasinaa bahanaa
vo exam ke din ka bechain maahaul
par vo maa ka vishvas Teachar ka Bharosaa
colleg ki wo lambisi raatein
vo doston se thele pe pyaari si baatein
vo gathering ke din ka ladnaa Jhagadnaa
vo ladkiyon ka yuhin hamesha akadnaa
bhulaaye nahin bhool sakta hai koi
jivan ka ek atoot hissaa...
vo college ki yaaden, vo college ke din
koi to louta de mere college ke din........
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
chand ko sitoron se or mujhe tum se mohabbet hai
phoolon ko baharon se or mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
mefil main jo milna nighahen jhukalena
koi samajh na pai ke mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
ab tere hijr main bus ek kaam hai asman takna
tum sitaron pe likh dena mujhe tum se mohabbat
hai hamain ehsas hai tum ko bhi ham se pyaar hai lekin
yeh mere roohbarooh kehna mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
---
UFF YE BEWIYA........! ( ZUBAN PER KIYA HAI? )
DIL MAY KIYA HAI?
AAJ APP JALDI GHAR AA GAYE? ... .........BAHER KISSE NE GHASS NAHIN DALI HO GI.
GARAMA GARAM CHAYE TAYER HAI............ KASH! TUJE SUGER HO JAYE... Manhoos kabhi to Na ker diya ker !
MAY APP KA PANOO DABA DOON. ------- KASH! TUMHRE GARDAN DABA Sakhti .. Haan Tarey Baap Ki Nouker Hoon Na ?
TUM SAMRAT,BEAUTIFUL HO. YA ALLAH! JOOT BOOLNE PER MUJE MAAF FARMA Kanjoos Ab To Shoping Kera Day
ZARA MUNE KO CHOOP KARA DIJEA APNE HI GHALTE KI SAZYA
BHUKTOO
.
INSURANCE KI FEES JAMA KARWA DE TUMHRE BAD KOI TU SHARA HO.
AAJ APP KIYA KHANA PASSANT KARNE GA JOOTE,BELAN,YA........!
AB APP AARAM FARMA LEJEA. TUJH KO MOUT KYUN NAHI AA JATI ??
NO OFFENSE GIRLS....
Abay Bahi Kiya Soch Rah hei ??? Ye KOi Dup chaal Nahi hei Balkey Haqeqat hei
---
Somthing About Nowadays
GIRLS & BOYS
~ Ager larkiyan perda karein jesa k humaarey deen main hai to na koi lerka unko tang karey ga,, na woh unko buri nazer sai
dekh ker ghalat harkaton mein parega,, aur awaargee khatam na sahee per average kam ho jaye gee..
~ Boys u should also limit urself.. and concentrate on your studies n making the future.. of urs.... ur parents and of ur
comming family..
~ Na love hoooga.
~ love nahi hooga to kisi k dil tootnay ka sabab bhi nahi banay ga.
~ Aaj kal ager 100 couples love kartey hain to un mein mushkil sai 10% shaadi kartey hain,,, aur un 10% main sai 6% log esay
hain k jin ki shaadi k baad jhagra shuru hoo jata hai aur baat divorce tak pohonch jaati hai
~ Ab bachay 4%...
~ 4 % main sai 2% esay hain jo khud to shaadi karlay tey hain but maa baap sai door hoo kar........... zindagee guzaartey
hain
~ Ab bachay 2%...
~ 2% hi log shayad esay hootey hain k jo khushnaseeb hoo woh bhi pata nahi kisi ki dua lag gai hoo.. to
~ kabhi hisaab lagaanay betho to yehi hisaab niklay ga.
~ Ab aap khud soocho k sirf ek ghalt faislay ki wajha sai kitnay ghar barbaad hoote hain, kitnay log zindagi k sakoon sai
mehroom reh jaatey hain.
~ Darasal hoota yeh hai k Allah Ta'la aasmaan per hi humarey jorey banata hai hum kuch bhi karlein humara life partner wohi
banta hai jisko Allah nay humarey liye chuna hai. Agar hum sahi hain, sachay hain, hum main koi khot nahi aur hum sahi
raastey per chal kar apnay life partner ko hasil karna chahtey hain to hum ko hamara partner wesa ban kar milay ga / gi jesay
hum khud hain.. Agar hum burey hain, jhootey hain aur ghalat raastey(bf ya gf bana kar) per chal kar apnay life partner ko
hasil karna chahtey hain to woh bhi hum ko ghalat ban kar milay ga woh bhi wesa hi hooga jesay aap khud hain.
~ Agar hum boyfriends aur girlfriends banaaye gay to humko bazahir aur ibteda main to bohat maza aaye ga lekin woh maza
mukhtasar hooga, jhoota hooga aur shuru shuru ka ....
~ To be very much realistic the average of success in love is 8% in the world.. isnt that enough for u to b aware...???
~ Jo life patner humein milna hay wo to humein mil hee jayga/jayegi.. to phir aap kiun apnay aap ko aur jo relative hein un
ko mushikil mein daalein...
~ These r my views May be i m wrong ....
~ Ab dekhna yeh hai k main right hoo ya wrong aur yeh mujhe aap log bataaye gay ......
~ So friends!!!!! forward this mail to your friends and mail me and tell me........ am i right or wrong?
---
BAcha : Abbu mujhay Bender la ker dien.
Abbu : nahi Baita mein app ko Bander nahin la ker de sukta.
BAcha : nahi abbu mujhay bander chahyiey.
Abbu : baita kaha hai na nahi la sukta bander.
BuAcha : nahi abbu app bander laien.
Abbu : abb mein tumhein marooon ga ager abb tum nay kaha bander lanay ko.
BAcha : .......
Abbu : ro keun rahay ho????
BAcha : app mujhay bander jo nahi laker dey rahay hain
Abbu : Baita Bander nahi la suktey na.
BAcha : keun abbu
Abbu : hai na aik musla.
BAcha : batien na abbu kia musla hai.
Abbu : Baita musla yeh hai kay Bander is waqt yeh email parhnay mien busy hai........
hahahahahahahahahhhahahHAHHAHAHhahahahhah.........
---
Teri aankain jhuki jhuki
tera chehra khila khila
jab tere chehre per haath ghumaya
to aadha kilo fair & lovely mila
TUSI bade hi gr8 ho,
RASGULLE ki pl8 ho,
PEPSI ka cr8 ho,
ANDE ka oml8 ho,
SMS KARNE ME bare le8 ho,
JALEBI ki tarah stra8 ho,
KHER jo bhi ho mere fevr8 ho...!
Mandir mein jaap karta hoon,
Masjid mein adaab karta hoon,
Insaan se kahin bhagwan na ban jaun
isliye roz tujhko SMS karke paap karta hoon
Child : - Mohit uncle mujhe na Bandar dekhna hai
Mohit : - Beta vo abhi SMS padh raha hai.
Zindagi jaise ek saza si ho gayi hai,
gamm ke saagar me is kadar kho gayi hai,
tum kar do ek SMS yeh guzarish hai meri,
tumari SMS ki adat si ho gayi hai.
Jis mehfil mein hum khade ho jaaye
waha Haritik bhi jhukta hai
Kaho Na Pyaar Hai
Kya mooh dukhta hai
Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya
Tumko dekha to yeh khyaal aaya
Ki Paaglo ke stock mein Naya Maal Aaya
Kaun sa gham hai jo yeh haal bana rakha hai
na to makeup hai, na baalon ko sajaa rakha hai
aur khama-kha cherti rehti hai yeh rukhsaaron ko
Tum ne zulfon ko bohut sar pe chara rakha hai
Jis din se juda vo humse hue
is dil ne dharkna chor diya
hai chaand ka mooh bhi utra utra
taaro ne chamkna chor diya
Kon kehta hai dost ki tumse humari judaai hogi
yeh afwaah zaroor kissi dushman ne uraayi hogi
shaan se rahenge tumahre dil mein hum
itne dino mein kuch to jagah banayi hogi
Vo likhte hain humara naam mitti mein
aur mita dete hain, Unke liye ye khel hoga
magar hume to vo mitti mein mila dete hain...
Umeedo ki manzil toot gayi
aankho se ashqo ki dhara beh gayi
are tumahri bhi kya izaat reh gayi
jab class ki ladki bhaiya keh gayi
Kabhi honsla bhi aazmaana chahiye
bure waqt mein muskurana chahiye
jab 10 dino mein khujli na mite
to 11 ve din nahana chahiye
Arz kiya hai.....
Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai
wah wah! wah wah!
Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai
khafa ho humse ya balance kam hai?
ha ha ha ha.....
Tammana se nahi tanhai se darte hain
pyaar se nahi ruswaai se darte hain
milne ki to bohat chahat hai
par milne ke baad judaai se darte hain
Dil torna humari aadat nahi
Dil hum kissi ka dukhate nahi
Bharosa rakhna meri wafaon pe
Dil mein bas kar hum kissi ko bhulate nahi
You r my sweet SONA
I don't want u KHONA
I want a place in your heart's KONA
Otherwise i will start RONA
Atleast Good Morning to kar LONA
Jab i ne U se pyaar kiya
to night ko sleeping chor diya
tere face ki gentle beauty ne
mere kind heart ko phor diya
Yaad mein teri aankhe bharta hai koi,
har saans ke saath tujhe yaad karta hai koi,
maut to sachai hai aani hai,
lekin teri judaai mein har roz marta hai koi....!
Safed rang ho agar mehboob ka ,
toh mohabbat ki detergent khusbudar nazar aati hai,
na koi aur hota kharid-dar SURF-EXCEL KA,
aur na dhulai RIN-SUPREME ki kam nazar aati hai...!!!
jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye
aur husn ke tewar nukile ho gaye
hum izhaar karne me thode dhiile ho gaye
aur unke haath peele ho gaye
Is Dil mein aansuyo ke mele hain
Tum bin hum bohat akele hain
Sab kuch chor kar tumeh e-mail karte hain
Dekho hum kitne vele hain
* vele = lazy (vele is a Punjabi word)
Har des ki ek sarhadd hoti hai
bache ki bhi ek zidd hote hai
aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka
Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai
Promise me we are true friends
I am lamp you are light
I am Coke you are Sprite
I am Sawan you are badal
I am Normal you are Pagal
I am Water you are Tanki
I am Tarzan you are Monkey
kayi raaz aise hote hain jo dikhaye nahi jaate
kayi kisse aise hote hain jo sunaye nahi jaate
kayi dil aise hote hain jo tode nahi jaate
aur kuch aap jaise dost aise hote hain jo chore nahi jaate.
Mere Dil, Jiger, Kidney, Liver ho tum
waqt-bewaqt aaye vo fever ho tum
Doob kar jisme marr jayu vo River ho tum
Mere jeevan mein ab to forever ho tum...
Shaam hote hii ye Dil udaas hota hai
Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai
Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai
Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..
Kya aankheiN hain aapki, kya baatein hain aapki..
us khuda ne kuch aisa aapko bnaya hai...
maano..."Shhhsss...KOI Hai" se bhoot nikal aaya hai....
Aap kya jaano hum kitna yaad karte hain
maano ya na maano har pal fariyaad karte hain
Roz khat likhte hain CARTOON NETWORK ko
aur aapko play karne ki maang karte hain....
waaaaahhhhhhhhh...
Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi
liya paper aur tasveer aapki bnayi
socha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
magar vo to bacho ko draane ke kaam aayi...
Bari asaani se dil lagaye jaate hain
par badi mushkil se waade nibhaye jaate hain
le jaati hai mohabbat un raaho par
jaha diye nahi dil jlaaye jaate hain
Aap jaise log hume kuch khas lagte hai.
mann me har waqt hum ek aas rakte hai,
jaane kab aa jaye sms aapka
is liye cell ko dil ke pass rakte hai
Muskura do zara khuda ke vaste,
sama-e-mahefil mai roshni kam hai,
tum hamare nahi to kya ghum hai,
hum tumhare to haiN ye kya kam hai?
Tere pyaar ki roshni aisi hai ki
har taraf ujaala nazar aata hai
sochta hu ki ghar ki bijli katwa du
kambaqt bill bohat aata hai
jawaab teri shayari ka....
denge hum shayari mein....
naam tera likh baithe hain....
apne dil ki diary mein....
Tum hoti to aisa hota, tum hoti to waisa hota
Tum is baat pe itna hasti, tum uss baat pe itna khush hoti,
Tum is baat pe ye kehti,tum uss baat pe wo kahati
shukar hai tum nahi ho!!!
Yeh jo haseeno ke baal hote hai,
larkon ko phassane ke jaal hote hai,
na jaane kitno ke khoon piye honge inhone,
tabhi to inke honth laal hote hai
Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aur humare dil se awaaz nikalii....
Fiteh Mooh...Tusin Ethe vii aa gaye !!!
Hi Musharraf needs 500 donkeys to attack on India. 499 ja chuke, message milte hi niklo...
Jaate hue kuch aisa kar ke jayo kaam
ki har galli se awaaz aaye..."ABBA JAAN"..." ABBA JAAN"
Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Yeh to unke bache hee kamine hain,
Jo Mammu-Mammu bulaate hain.
Apni Surat ka kabhi to didaar de
tarap raha hu ab aur na intzaar de
Apni awaaz nahi sunani to mat suna
Kam se kam 1 Missed call hee maar de
"Sardar to his friend ""I kiss my Wife everyday before leaving for Office, what about you?"" Friend: I too, after you
leave."
(FW:)Dhrm lal: Bhgwan mje dukh day.azab dy,drd day,mje mar dy meray pechay bhoot lga dy. Bhgwan: Abay saalay! Aik
line men bol na biwi chaheay.
-Sardar apni Girl Friend ko I Love U kehta aur gir jata. I love u kehta aur Phir gir jata. Girl frend: Ye Kya kar rahe ho
Sardar : Oye I am falling in love . . .
-Bulbul ka bacha khata tha khichri peta tha pani gata tha gany mary sarany ik din akila bytha howa tha mai ny oraya wapis na
aaya kuti ka bacha ha ha ha ha ha
-Jale usay aag kahte hain..Bhuje howay ko rakh kahte hain..Cobra usay naag kahte hain..Or jo tumhare pas nahi,use dimag kahte
hain...
-What is a girl friend?Ans: addition of problem, Substraction of Money, Multiplication of Enemy, Division of Friends .. So b
Carefull
-Dnt snd any msgs, i dnt wnt 2 c u, 2 hear ur voice.2think of u , 2 keep in touch wid u !!Coz da doctor advised me 2 keep
away from sweets :)
-Hoon Main Doctor Jahan, Meri Wife Hai Nurse Wahan,Haye Kaisa zulm Sehna Per Raha hai.Mujhe Meri Wife Ko "sister" Kehna Per
Raha hai...
-Tum dour sahi majbor sahi,par yad tumhari ati ha,tum saans wahan laitay ho par badbu yahan tuk ati hai!UseCLOSE-UP!!Ab
Rs.5.only
Well come to Ramzan Menu, Apne GUNAH JHARNAY k liye 1 Dabayein.TOBA k liya 2 Dabayein.MAFI k liye 3 Dabayein.BURAEE SE NIJAT
k liye"APNA "GALA Dabayein.
Jub 1 chor shoes ki dukan pe chori kertey huwey pakra gya to usey addalat mein paish kia gya to judge ney uss sey
poochaJudge: jub tum chori ker rahey thy to tum ko apni biwi aur bachon ka koi khyal nahi aya ?Chor: Janab aya to tha magar
wahan sirf mardana jootey thy.
LOng TimE aGo...
oNLy idiOts usEd tO reAd mY SMs aNd TodaY......
THE HISTORY CONTINUES !....
Q:What's the difference between 'Love Marriage' & 'Arranged Marriage'? Answer: First one is suicide and second one is a well
planned murder.
hav you evr seen a monkey covered in a polythene ?
no???
....never mind...
juz hav a look at ur id-card!!
Sardar Ji Ki Girl Friend Ne Sardar Se Kaha,Girl Freind,"Darling! Meri Wish Hai k Tusi Maino Engagment Pe Ring Do."Sardar
Ji,"Ok! Give Me Ur Fone Number."
SMS na karke dil tod diya mera,
Aab mobile dafana dena,
Kafan na mile to apna rumal udha dena,
Koi puche rog kya tha to nazare jhuka ke apni kanjusi bata Dena
dil k mehman ban jao ankhon ka arman ban jao honton ki muskan ban jao yeh sab bi ban jana lakin, pehlay insaan to
ban jaooo,,,,,
Chori Chori Ye Aana Jana Chor DoChupke Chupke Yon Nazar MilanaChor DoKisi Din Buht Pito Gay Unse TumYe Masjidon Se Jootay
Churana Chor Do.
Boy: I can kiss u widout touchingGirl: U cant.Boy: Lagi 20 20 Rupay ki bet,Girl: ok(Boy Kisses Tightly)Girl: U Touched
me.Boy: Ye lo 20 Rupey.
AsSi PaGaL yAaR dE pEeChEyAaR pAgAL hOr De PeEcHeO pAgAl kiSi HoR dE pEeChEsArEy PaGaL aGeY pEeChE. :)
Tum dour sahi majbor sahi,par yad tumhari ati ha,tum saans wahan laitay ho par badbu yahan tuk ati hai!UseCLOSE-UP!!Ab
Rs.5.only
FATHER asks son "Beta tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?" SON "Mujhe chand jaisi biwi chahiye - jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali
jaye!"
Ek sardar apne marriage certificate ko 1 ghante se dekh raha thaWIFE: tussi inni der se ki dekh rahe ho?SARDAR: expiry date
dhoond rha hon.
Wife:Tum muje kitna piar krty ho! HUSBAND: shahjahan jitna. WIFE:!mery mrny ky bad Taj Mahal banaoge?HUSBAND!:maine to plot
bhi le liya hai,Delay to tm kr rahi ho.[8->
Dil se boloon ek baat main sachhi, hum tum ek daal ke do panchhi. Dosti hamari yeh hogi na kachhi, teri photo se to meri
negative achhi !Hahahaha..;o)
aaj dedaar kal yaar persun pyar phir ikrar or phir intazaar phir takraar phir daraar sari mehnat bekaar Or akhir mein aik or
devdas at beer bar
Usne hathon per mehndi lagai hui hai...Hum ne uske doli sajai hui hai...Hume pata tha woh bewafa nikle gi is liey...Humne
uski choti behan bhi phasai hui hai:-).
Sardar was riding on horse.he crossed da red light & policeman whistles.da sardar lifts da tail of horse & says."LE
KARLE,KARLE NUMBER NOTE".
Two sardars are driving in a car,one sardar puts on the indicator and asks the other to check if it is working.He puts his
head out and says?..yes..no..yes..no..Yes..no. . .
I want you to be with me in a nice restaurant to have candle light dinner and i say those sweet three words to you., "pay
the bill'"!'
BABA JI k melay main is saal parsaad main KAMBAL bantey jain gay,ye baat kisi or ko mat batana kyun k ye sms sirf "SELECTED
FAQIROON"ko he kya ja raha ha
Usse pyar karke meri kismat hi jaag gayi,Usse pyar karke meri kismat hi jaag gayi,Maine itne love letter post kiye k woh
"POSTMAN k saath hi bhaag Gayee"
Ya Rab dil e jawan mein ik zinda tmanna detu khwab k pyasy ko ta'beer ka darya deis bar makan badloon to aisi prosan dyJo
qalb ko garma de jo rooh ko trpa de
-Honto say jo chooh liya,Ehsas ab tak hay,aankhain num hainorSanso may aag ab tak hai,Or kyon na ho.........khai bhi to
.."HARI MIRACH"hai ;-)
-U stole my memories i excused uU stole my heart i excused u!U stole my smile i excused u!But dis is 2 muchMere doggy ka
biscuit wapis karo!!
-Itnay kamzor ho gaye teri judai se..Wah Wah WahArz kiya hyitnay kamzor ho gaye teri judai se..k ek din machar hi utha lay
gya charpai se:-)
-Sirf aik bar keh do jo december main tum nay kaha tha,sardiyun ki bheegi rätoon ka ehsas lota do,sirf aik bar keh doGARAM
anddaay...
-Child: Mom is Bar Hum Sarey Patakhy is Shop Se Lengey Mom:Lekin Beta Ye Tu Girls Hostel Hai. Child: Papa To Kehty Hein K
Sari Phul-Jhariyan Yahi Rehti Hein.
-Hi..Teacher ask childrn 'Wht do u wish 2 do in future?'Ali:I wnt 2 be a pilot.Imran:I wnt 2 be a doctor.Sana:I wnt 2 be a
good motherTahir:I wnt 2 help Sana
-=>GOD aap ki zindgi Menaar_e_Pakistan jitni lambi kare,aur har koi 5 rupey de kar aap par charh jaye..Aur Enjoy karey
(Ameen).hehehe
-Dad:putar tu ppr vich80%no lenay nePutar:dont worry mai100%lava gaDad:kanjra mazak karda way mery nalPutar:pehle mazak kis
kanjr ne shuro kita c
-Mat kar dost apni girl friend se itni mohabbat,Woh ankho se war karti hai.Mainay dekha hai uski ankho mai,Woh mujh se bhi
pyar karti hai.....
-Ek Molvi: Film actor k paas masjid ka chanda mangne gaya.Actor: Ap to kehte hain ka hamara pesa haraam heMolvi: Es pese se
ham latreen banaainge:-
-jis larki pe nzar rakhta hon uski ho jati hai shadijis larki pe nzar rakhta hoon us ki ho jati hai
shadiNIGHAH-E-MARD-E-MOMIN SE BADAL JATI HAIN TAQDEERAIN!
-Kashmir ki khoobsorat wadi may, baraf ki chotti pe,Aik romantic raat ko,HEER ne RANJHA se zor se kaha,'way tut paineya thand
ho gai a Koati pala'
-Gulaab ko bhi Kamal bana dete,Uski ek Ada pe Kai gazal bana dete,Kambhakt marti nahi mujh par larkiyaan,Warna LAHORE me bhi
TAJMAHAL bana dete...
-Kashmir ki khoobsorat wadi may, baraf ki chotti pe,Aik romantic raat ko,HEER ne RANJHA se zor se kaha,'way tut paineya thand
ho gai a Koati pala'
-If doctors start film making,the names of films will b:Operation Ho Na Ho,Kaho Na Bukhar Hai,Ham blood de chuke sanam,Dil
Wale Nurse Le Jaein ge.
-Tum Haseen!Tum Cute!Tum Great!Tum Famous!Tum Beautiful!Tum Inteligent!Tum Star!Tum Stylish!Ban Sakty Ho Agar Mujhe Follow
Karo !
-Lab Pe Ati He Dua Ban K Tmana Meri.DIL Karta Ha Band Karva Doon Sim Teri.Door Dunia Ka Mere Dam Se ujala Ho Jae.Jo Mujhe MsG
Na Kre Us Ka Mobile Kho Jae.
-Chandni rat mein sone se pahle,khwabon ki dunya mei khone se pehle Mai ne socha k tumhe yaad dila donSuSU KAR LENA SONE SE
PEHLE.
-PRACTICE it1. Take 1grape2. Take it in ur hand3. Put it in b/w ur fore teeth4. Approach da mirror slowly and seeWah!Langoor
k mu mei angoor
-Man to Doc:-> Is there any way for long life? Doc:-> Get married. Man:-> Will it help? Doc:-> No, but the thought of long
life will never come 2ur mind.
-Girl:Mai tumhare liye sub chor du gi.
Boy:Parents
Girl:Yes
Boy:Khana Pina
Girl:Yes
Boy:Apni Frnds
Girl:Yes
Boy:Star Plus
Girl:Mu Sambhaal k baat kar.
-Meine ÄAp kö khwab me dekhak aap hooron k darmian hemene ALLAH se pocha isko kis neki ki ye jaza mili heJawab aya:-isko jaza
nahi mili Huron ko saza mili he
-Jab say tum ko dekha haiMujhay raat ko neend nahi aati,Orjb b tumhari yaad aati haidil say ik aawaz aati hai(Jal tu Jalal tu
aayi bala ko tal tu).
-Teacher:is sentence ka urdu turjuma kero,"A beautiful girl is walking in a park"Student:Yarr!!! Bacchi check kar.."
-Arz kiya hai$amundar mein water,Water mein Fish... Aapko ASSALAM, Aapki girlfriend ko kiss...Mmmmuuuuaaaaahhhhhhh...Maza aa
gaya..:-)kal phir karungi...haha
-Girl:Ouch its 2 tightBoy:Dont worry Love,we'll do it slowlyGirl: Push it!!Boy: Aah..i can'tGirl: It's painful jaan,nikalo
bahar dard ho raha haiBoy: Forget it,lets get a "New WEDDING RING"
-On first night Dulha entering his room prayed"Oh GOD ! Mujhay taqat or guidance day"Dulhan boli "Aby ! taqat ki dua mang !
Guide mein khud kar don gi"
-Kaisa zamana aa gaya hai "WARID" Walo ne to had kar di.. bade bade poster me ek Ladki dikhate hai aur likhte hai: LAGE
RAHO.. RAT BHAR SIRF 10 PAISE MEIN
-Tum din ko rat kaho hum rat kahe ge,....Tum subah ko sham kaho hum sham kahain ge,.....Q k,.......Paglön se behUs ka kia
faida.
-Ek research se pata chala hay k monkey bhi sms parh saktay hain. Ye SMS apko final testing ke liye bhej rahay hain. Apna
certificate zoo se collect kar lain.
-Once there was a crow,Pind vich renda c o,1 din talli ute baitha c o,1 chirri de pichy pey gya c o,Chirri pai c ro,Chirri de
pio ne kuttya crow,Crow sherminda gya c ho,Hun chirri nu phen ji kainda c o,MORAL:Kisey de dhee bhein nu na cherro.
-Haseen tum ho to buray hum bhi nahi, Mehlo mein tum ho to sarkon pe hum bhi nahi, Dosti kar k kehtay ho BUSY ho, Kaan
kholkay sunlo Free hum bhi nahi..
-aik sheikh apnay totay say kahta hay"mian mitho chori khani hay" tota sheikh se"saliya kadi app v khadi ae"
-Kaise ho ab?theek ho?pain killer tablets lety rehna.Hajiyo ne bohat mara ho ga na pathro se.kya kerein is k baghair hajj
nahi hona tha na
-Thapar marne par naraz wife se shohar bola admi usay marta hai jise pyar karta he.Wife ne husbnd ko 2 thapr mare aur boli
ap kya samjte hai k main apse pyar nahi karti.
-Aapke liye 1 rishta aaya hai - Baap Hardware mein hai, Maa Software mein hai, Bhai Footwear mein hai, Aur ladka sirf
Underwear mein hai. Qubool??? ;-)
-
-Dad:What type of a Girl u want to marry.Son:I want to marry a girl who is Intelligent,Well-Studied,Obeys,Good-Looking
Dad:Then u have to marry 4 times!
-A girl reach late in class.Prof: why r u late?Girl: sir a boy wz following me?Prof: then why r u late?Girl: sir the boy wz
walking slowly.
-Is sms ko nini (sleep) chor kar mat parho.is sms ko ap baad main be par sakte han.yeh sms koi joke nai hay yeh sms bohat
imprtnt bhi nai hayIs sms main ap ko kUch kahna nai hayyeh sms thora lamba zaror haypar yeh sms kUch khas nai haypar mjhy is
bat ke samj nai ate kah ap is sms ko itne dehan say kyon par rahe hainyeh sms to main ne waisa he fwd kya thaAp ko gusa to
aya hoga par kia karon,.........Mjhey bhi aya tha;-)
-Wife, pointing at a couple next door, says 2 her husband: "Look at him he kisses her all the time. Why cudn't U do that?"
Husband: "I tried but she Slapped me
-Every body wantsSum 1 specialSum 1 niceSum 1 cuteSum 1 smartSum 1 sweetSum 1 honestTabhi to mein sochoon sarey merey pechy Q
parey hein......;)
-1 chota child apni mom se a ker apny mulazomu ki shikayt karne laga. Ami. Bashir or Noora kitchen mai eik dosary ki kamar
per hath daly pata nai kia batain ker rahey thay.mai achank undar gea tu 2no alang ho gae. KIA,... Mai abi 2no ko batati ho
ja ker k bacho k samny aesi harkaty kartey hai. 2no ko nokri se nikalti ho.abi wo murhi he the k bache ki talia bajane ki
awaz per ruk gai. April fool, april fool.... Wo bashir tohri tha wo tu papa thay.
-If I need brain transplantation I will definitly prefer ur brain..y? bcos Ur Genius... Na Na I just want a brain which is
never used B4 Bole to ZerometeR
-Kaash Main Teri Haseen NAAK Ka Chooha Hota...Tu Bari Chah Se Baray Maan Se Nikalti Mujhko...Main Teri Unglion Main Sharma
kar CHIPAK sa jataPhir Tu Apni Sahelion se CHUPATI MujhkoMain unko Dekh kar DARR sa jata..Tu Duniya se Chup kar Kahin
CHIPKATI Mujhko or is Tarhan Main AMAR ho jata
-JoHo GayaWo Ho GayaJoHona HogaWo HogaAur JoNahi Hona HaiWo Nahi HogaKyun kay JoHona HaiWo ToHoga He HogaAb Dekhna HaiKay
kyaHoga..?AurKya NahiHoga.Hone ko ToKuch BhiHogaYehi Sochna HaiKay KyaHoga..?AgarKuch Hoga ToTheek HogaAurNahi HogaTo
BhiTheek HogaAurTheek Nahi HogaTo KuchKaisay Theek Hoga?Ab aap batao kAgayKya hoga?KisiAurKoTum, bhi..bhejo,..acchha..time
pass hoga..!
-Mallika Sherawat goes to skin doctor and asks: main nahatey waqt kya lagaun? DoctOr:Bathroom ki kundi :))
-Girl: if u try 2 kiss me "mein shor macha doon gi?Boy: lekin yahan tu dor dor tak koi nahi hai.Girl: magar formality tu pori
karni hai....
-2 khoosray kaheen ja rahay thay un mai say ek neechay gir gaya to dosray nay ussay uthatay huay kaha "Utho behan mard bano "
-Apni mehbooba ko kabhi chand mat kehna. kyun ke suna hai ke chand par bhi 24 banday charh
chuke aur ek kuta bhi.
-Aik hindu nay musalman say pocha hindu ko jalate or muslman ko dafnate kion hain ? Musalman very simple Khazanay ko
dafnatay hain or kachray ko Jalatay hain'.
-When I Call u,1 ring means I'm thinking of u, 2 rings means I like u, 3 rings means i'm missing u,4 rings
means i need u, 5 rings means.....BEHRE HO PHONE UTHAO JULDI!!!
-O mery dil de chain, tery pichay kutte pain, tu lutiya mere dil da chain,rab kare tenu keeray pain, tery nain bary
nasheely,jeeven jharoo de teelay, tu mery dil wich idaan wasi,jeeven kichar wich maj phasi,jane jigar jane tamanna,eddar aa
teriyan latta pannan..
-MSG karne pe jo marte hain...CALL karne se jo darte hain...BAD LUCK to dekho...!!!..????Aisy KANjÖÖS dost mere he palle
parte hain..!hehehehe
-Lab-e-ati hai dua ban k tmna meri Zindagi ek LOVER ki sorat ho Khudaya meri IMPRESS muj se her ek larki ho jai meri ek nazar
pe dil apna wo de jai ho meri JEANS se yohi mere badan ki zenat jistarha MAKEUP se hoti ha husan ki zenat ho mera kam
school,college k bahir flurt krna her HASEEN larki ki maan se bi mohabat krna mere ALLAH ho perhai se bachna muj ko ISHQ KI
JO RAH HO USSI RAH PE CHALANA MUJHKO
-1nce there ws 2 lvrz,they made much lv wid eachother...1day by chance,boy decided 2 run away 4rm d house,but d girl refused
2 do so.Boy said if she'll not run wid him he wud lie his life..or he will do suicide..But d grl still not agree wid
him,atlast d boy kill himself.wen d grl reached there,her hands were red wid boy's blood,boy were breathing last...he said
her dont tell any1 abt dis n died.Wen d grl reached back,her mother askd her abt d blood n d boy.She told nothing,n sat on
bed..bedsheet spoted wid blood.She ws afraid n told her mother abt blood.Than police came there n girl cried"maa ab kia
hoga,POLice mujy arrest kr ly ge?"Mother said: dont worry SURF EXcEL hai na...Hahahaha ha ha ha ha kasa ha?
-Which is the longest toilet in the world?guess!!!"Pakistan railways tracks"coz u can use it from Karachi to Khyber.Proud to
be a Pakistani [;-)]
- Boys: KHUDA bachaye hamein in haseenoh se,naazneenon se,dilnasheenon se,jaanasheenon se.......,.,.,Par inhe kon bachaye hum
kameenon se.
-Aik Murghi 3Andey Deti He Aur Dua Karti He K Us K Bache Naek Hon.Jb Us K Bache Ando Se Bahir Atey Hain To 1Namaz Parh Rha
Hota He,2Tasbih Prh Rha Hota He Lekin 3Bahir Nhi Ata.Murghi Ro K Dua Krti He K Us Ka 3Bacha B Bahir Ajaye,Itne Me Andey Se
Awaz Aati He K Ami Jan Me Eitkaf Me Betha Hon.HA HA HA HA
-God apun se bola,"KHIDAR JANE KA"Jannat ya Dozakh!Apun bola DozakhU know apun aisa q bola?Becoz apun ko maloom hai k tum
sala dost log wahi milay ga.
-Ik adme chopkay say jahunam say nekla aur janat main chala gayafreshtay na pakar ker khub mara.adme utha or bolaTUHADE INA
HARKTA TO KOI JANAT WECH NAI ANDA
-Sab dost bewafa ho gaye, hum apne mobile se khafa ho gaye,ek sms to kar de zaalim,warna duniya wale samjhenge hum dono juda
ho gaye......
-Sas bahu se:beti tu chup q rhti he. Bahu_Man g meri man ne kha tha k chup rehna.sas: nen beti tu bola krbahu: man g agr ap
ka beta mr jay to kia meri 2sri shadi kr do gi.Sas: beti tu chup reh teri man ne thek kha tha.
-Neend ati hai to KHUWÄB ata hai..Khuwabo mei ek LERKI ati hai..LERKI k pechay uska BÄÄP ata hai..PhirNa NEND ati hai Na
KHUWÄB ata hai.;-)
-Larki:Aisa khat likh sajna way,meri umer beet jaye pardhay
PardhayBoy:¥§¿(i@0;>¤€~¡;+e¥B#);a£"£;=£"e*+2=*€@<>€$¤¿¤£>€+%¥€~Ley hun parhdi reh sari umray
-A beautiful poem on tatti,Read it carefully.Tatti meri pyari tatti,Flush wich shingaari tatti,Peeli tatti-kaali tatti,Haayo
meri pyari tatti,Kudrat da dastoor nirala,Saaryan nu hi aave tatti,Khulke je naa aave tatti,Sachi bara satave tatti,Lagataar
je aave tatti,Sab de hosh udave tatti,Ander pata nahi factory kedi,Jedhi roz banave tatti,Rab kare savere tainu, Bhangra
kardi aave tatti,Aye SMS sab nu forward kar,Nai to band hove teri tatti.
-=>Pagal hain wo loug ju piyar mein larkioun ko miss karty hainkarna hy tou macharoun ko miss karo ju khud aa kar kis karte
ha.
-Phullan nal gulaban da ki tuk bnda a,Bootan nal juraban da ki tuk bnda a,A hi soch k main khali chadh aya paper nooK Swalan
nal jwaban da ki tuk bnda a...
-KASHTI Chali KINARA Choot gayaAASMAN se SITARA Toot gayaTu bhi to Aaj tak nahi SudhraJahan DekhiDIWAARWahin MOOT gaya.( ".)
< )', - - . LL ,.,.,: -Dr: Aap ko kya problem hai?Patient: Patle motion.Dr: Kitne patle?Patient: Booohaaat patle.Dr: Fir b kitne?Patient: Itne k Aap us se kulli kar sakte hain. -Tere gham me tarap k Mar Jayenge,Mar GayeTo Tera Nam Le jaenge,Rab Ko kah k Tuje Bi bulae ge,aur Upper Sath Baith k KURKURE khayen ge..... -Js Trha Soraj Nikalta Hai Hr Raat K BaadChand Alwida Kehta Hy Mulaqat K BaadAp Ghr Se Mt Nikalyega Wrna Log KahngeDkho Lizard Nikal Ayi Barsat K Baad ;-) -Aap kya jaano hum kitna yaad karte hain maano ya na maano har pal fariyaad karte hain Roz khat likhte hain CARTOON NETWORK ko aur aapko play karne ki maang karte hain.... waaaaahhhhhhhhh... -girls ke college me strike thi,boys bhi unke saath ho liye,girls ne nara lagaya "hamare mange" picche se boys ki awaaz aayi "sindoor se bharo"........ -Jin: kia hukam ha meray aqaa?Man: meray liye khobsurat aur chikni larkian laoJin: mein kokaf ka jin ho heera mandi ka kanjer nahi ;-) -Moulvi: "Jab mein mar jaaun to samney walon ko zaroor bulana".Bivi: "kyon?"Moulvi: "kyu kaay unkey ghar ki auratein murdey se lipat lipat kay roti hain"......! -=>GirltoboyDarling,Ek 1000ka card send karo mera balnc end ho gaya hy-tm mere ashiq ho na,boymay tmhra ashiq ho KOI warid
WALO KA jawai NAi.
-College wali:Masale dar...Office wali:Narum narum.Muhale wali:Namkeen...Ghar wali:Garma garm.Aap kya samjay?Mei to "ROTI" ki
bat kr rahi hon
-Yaad rakh kar meri dosti ko tum ne
Meri zindgi par ek ehsaan kar diya Is mobile mein yeh last rupeya tha,Dekho hum ne woh bhi TMHARE NAAM kar dia
-College is 4 Knowledge, Knowledge is 4 Life, Life is 4 Wife but Wife is a knife which cuts ur Life,so never choose Ur Wife
in a college Life...! :->.....
-Mast nazron se dekh lena tha,Agr tmana thi azmanay kiHm yunhi behosh hojatay kya zrorat thi Juraben sunghany ki...
-Lmha lmha umar guzar jayegi,ShadI k BÅÑDHÅÑ me koi ÅP k bandh jaegi,Abhi b waqt hai kissi se ÅFFÅIR krlo,Kya pta kl konsi
CÅRToòN Ap ki DULHAN bnjaegi...:)
-1 MURGHI ne 3 anday diye. or dua mangi babies naik nikley.kuch din bad babies niklay.Pehla baby namaz parhta hua
nikla.Dosra baby Tasbih parhta hua nikla.Tesre anday se baby nahi nikla to murghi pareshan ho gai, itney may andy se awaz
aai, Ammi mein aetakaf may betha hun.
-Hlchl...gandhi g ki dhoti me...mein hun na...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...dil wale dlhnya le jaein ge...gandhi g ki dhoti
mein...lge rho muna bhai...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...kuch kuch hota hai... gandhi g ki dhoti mein...aa ab lot chlein...gandhi
g ki dhoti mein...masti...aao romance krein...gandhi g ki dhoti mein...koi mil gya...gandhi g ki dhoti mein....
-Dont take it personal its 4 fun!O mere dik de chain,Tere piche kute pain,Tu lutya mere dil da chain,Rab kare tenu kery
pain.Tere nain bare nashile ne,Jevain jharu de tile ne.Tu mere dil vich iss tarha vasi,Jivain kichar vich majh
phasi.Jan-e-jigar jan-e-tamanna,Edhar aa terian latta panna.
-In next 15 minSALMAN KHANwill calluAMIR KHANwill calluSAIF ALIwil caluFARDEENwil calluSHAH RUKHwillcall u2 ask my phone
numberplz mat dena.
-Baby baby Yes mama Ka punjabi version: Kaky kaky? Han baybay Phak lai cheeni Na baybay Jhoot marda Na baybay Laawaan
jutti Na baybay Khol bootha hahaha
-Boy friend:mein tum se shadi nahe ker sakta ghar waley mana ker rahay hain.Girl friend:ghar mein kon kon hai.Boy friend: 1
biwi or 3 bachay.
-When nobody luvs u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody think about u,every1 ignores u, then go n sit in the corner close ur eyes n
think !BHAINCHOD CHAKAR KYA HAI.
-Mareez Munna bhai say:yeh pholoon ki mala kis kay liye.?Munna bhai:"Bolay to" yeh apun ka pehla operation hay.Success huwa
to mere liye,nahi to taray liye.!
-Tumhe kia pta k gum kia hay..Tumhe kia pta gum kise kehty hain..Tum kia jan0 gum kia chez hyTum ne to hmeshathook se he
envelope chipkaya hay.
-Tumhe kia pta k gum kia hay..Tumhe kia pta gum kise kehty hain..Tum kia jan0 gum kia chez hyTum ne to hmeshathook se he
envelope chipkaya hay.
-When nobody luvs u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody think about u,every1 ignores u, then go n sit in the corner close ur eyes n
think !BHAINCHOD CHAKAR KYA HAI.
-1 aadmi Bhagwan Se:Bhagwan g ap kab khush hote hain? Bhagwan:Jab Indian film me koi vilan lrki ko pakrta hai Or lrki kehti
hai,Plz muje Bhgwan k liye chord do.
-Neend di goli kha lay changa ray ga,Sochan kolon jan chura lay changa ray ga,FA,BA,MA di degre lay kay ki hassil,Dahi bhalay
di rehri la le changa ray ga.
-Neend di goli kha lay changa ray ga,Sochan kolon jan chura lay changa ray ga,FA,BA,MA di degre lay kay ki hassil,Dahi bhalay
di rehri la le changa ray ga.
-In Our Life, Six Things Can Come At Any Time...1- LOVE2- FRiENDSHiP3- MONEY4- ILLNESS5- DEATH6- ? ? ?... Su Su..."Is liye
kar ke sona!
-Ankho ka Docter mareez ko aty dykh ker bola.Ap ki nazer to waqae kharab hy.mareez ap ko ksy pta chala Dr.kyu k ap derwazy ki
bajay kherki sy ander ay hen....
-Today is death aniversary of CHARLI CHAPLIN... so plz send this message to at least one cartoon. I have done my job.
-Romantic shayari; Kutta marr gaya razai vich,main pagal ho gaya teri judai vich, Fernail te machchar beh nahi sakda, main
tere bina hun reh nahi sakda.
--Judge: Why do u want divorce?Man: My wife doesn't satisfy me in bed.Judge to wife: Is it correct?Wife: Sara mohalla khush
hai, bas esi ko taklif hai.
-Chand Par Ap ka Naam Likhne Ko Ji Chahta
Hai..................................Par?Par?KyiaKareinYeKhayalHameshaDopahairKoHiAataHai.....!
-Pakistan ka matlub kiaBum Dhamakay or AghwaYEH tera Pakistan ha na mera Pakistan haiYe uska Pakistan ha jo Sadr-e-Pakistan
haiPAKISTAAAAAAAN!Se Zinda Bhag
-MUSHARAF ne apni Biwi ko surprise dene k lye apni Munchen ktwali or chupke se so gya,Nend me jb Biwi ne mouh pe hath phra to
boli-SHOKAT AZIZ Tum aj phir agaye?
-Ye badal, ye bijli, sirf aap k liye hai, ye mausam ye hawa sirf ap k liye hai,Zamana beet gaya aap ko nahae hue,Ye bewaqt ki
barish sirf aap k liye hai.
-Kya hai yaar,Ap b ajeeb ho,Meray dil k kareb ho,Miltey ho na sms krtay ho,Kya ...Mjh ....Se ......Bhi ......Zyada
.....Gareeb .....Ho ......
-Many many HAPPY RETURNS of the Day 2 u. Dekha tum ne kya socha tha..? tum nahi bataogay to muje pata nahi lagega k
aj........¤ANIMAL'S DAY HAI¤
-Molvi ne grl frnd ka bda intzAr kia pr wo na i tng A k us ne loud speakr pe kaha
hazrAAt.....! chnhggi nai kiti.....!!:)
-Sumeera Malik Ne Maulana Fazl.ur.Rahman Se Shikayat Ki K Sheikh Rasheed Muj Pe Awazain Kasta Hai K"I LOVE U"...aurSher Afgan
Se Bi Tung Hoon... Wo Bi Mujhay Cherrta Hai. Maulana Ne Dono Haatho Ko Phelaya aur Kaha : fikr mut kero aur"Aao ISLAM ki
AGHOSH Mein Aajao"
-Ik tchr ne apne student se pucha k btao billi dumm kyöñ hilati haì,to student ne kaha kyøñ k mi$s dumm billi kö nahi hila
sakti.. :-) hahahahahahaha
-Agr"dil"ko anda(egg) kehty to films k naam aise hote>hum anda de chuke sanam>yeh anda ap ka howa>hum ap k andy main rehty
hyn>andy waly dulhania ly jayngy
-Tanhai me na waqt bitaya karo Kabhi kabhi mehfilo me bhi aya karo kia hua jo toot gaye hen samne k 4 daant Phir b moun
khol kar muskuraya karo.:p
-Dil karta hey,Lamba 5 inch ho,Denga be ho,Mota be ho, Poora under chala jahey, bar bar jahey,Maza be ahey,Pani be
neklay,Kash tum be hotay, Hum dono hath sae pakartay aur dabatay, Pher CHOPA lagatay''MANGO'' ka !!
-I Love three thing.1= pizza 2= pepsi 3= you...Reasons :...Pizza to eat...Pepsi to drink....And you to........Tabel kon saaf
karay ga?
-Tip of the day:Always keep ur pic in ur pocket,u knw y?Whnever u face any problem just c ur pic & say 3times"If i can face
this,I can face anything!!
-QAID.E.AZM k 3 farman :1. "Awam ki taraqi ki bunyad SMS pe rakhi jati ha2. "Cal karo! is se mohabt barhti ha"3. aur "jis ne
misd call ki wo hum ma se nai
-Samandar k kinary betha kro,koi na koi lehr to ay ge,kismat na badly to kya howa,kamaskam? SHAKAL HI DHUL JAY GE:
-Aaj MOSAM mai Kuch AJEEB si Baat haiAaj BE KABU se Mrey JAZBAT haiG Chahta hai k apko CHURA Lu ap seMagar MaMa kehti
hainChori Karna"BURI BAAT" hai...
-1 khusray k pas qabar mai frishta aya,Aor bola ,jenab hasab dewo,khusra bola,sanu deta ki si ?jera tanu hasab dayie !
-Samandar k kinary betha kro,koi na koi lehr to ay ge,kismat na badly to kya howa,kamaskam? SHAKAL HI DHUL JAY GE:
-door se dekha to sher aa raha tha wah wah wah door se dekha to sher aa raha tha, paas hum gae nai kyun ki sher aa raha tha
wah wah wah wah!
-Pyar ko mat chhupao,usy zarurat hai jatane ki,Apni khuahishon ko mat chupao,unhe zrurat hai bahirane ki,Ab aur perfume mat
lagao, tumhe zarurat hai nahane ki:p
-Kash tum wadday apnay nibah jatay . .Kisi tarah mera dil behla jatay . . .10 Rs. nahi thay tu . . .5 Rs. wali choti coke hi
peela deatay .
-Subha sham AAP ki yad Aave hai,Sari Rat jagave hai,Karne ko to kar lein CALL AAP ko,Par Customer center ka Wo larki,Bar Bar
Balance low Bataave hai.
-Media ask ABHISHEK.....What is the difference between old & new UMRAO-JAAN???..Abhishek: Naye wali se APNI setting hai...Aur
purani wali se PAPA ki... ;o>
-A LOVE STORYDay1: Aik larka aik larkiDay2: Wohi larka doosri larkiDay3: Wohi larka teesri larki MORALLarkian badal
jati hain BUT Larky nai bdalty
-Hum dosti puri nibhana jante hain,zakham tumhare kitne bi gehre ho hum dawa lagana jante hain.Hume Bhulne ki kosish mat
karna,hum gala dabana b janty hain
-LOVE is IODEX."Ooh ah ouch dur kary"LOVE is SUPREEME."Yehi to hai wo apna paan"LOVE is HABIB COOKING OIL."Q K yeh dil ka
mamla hai".LOVE is GOLD LEAF " Sehat k liye muzzir hai ".LOVE is SUFI BANASPATI""Jo naam hai Aitemaad ka".LOVE is
disprin''bachon ki pohanc se dor rakhain''
-Pyar K Geet Gayen GayHum Tum,Apni Dunya Basaaen Gay Hum Tum,Jo Diye Bujh Gaey Hawaaon Se,Un Ko Bech Kr,PHiLiPS K BULB Layen
Gay Hum Tum
-man runs home nd shouts: PACK UR BAG HONEY, I JUST WON 10 MILLION DOLLARS IN LOTERYwife: do i pack 4 beach or resort?man:
who cares? just pack n get lost ;)
-Kanjosi da matlab kia?Na sms kar Na cal mila Parh parh sms hasda ja Saadi ker na koi parwa Saada balance roz muka Apne set
nu..tala la..!
-2 Pyaz,3 Lehsun,5 Gram Zeera,3 Kali Mirch,2 Spoon Namak,4 Spoon Oil,1 Cup Water Or Thora Sa Hara Dhaniya,Pata Ha Mai Kya
Bana Rahi Hon?Ullu :-P
-Wife:India jao to saarhee bhejna,Dubai jao to jewelry,France jao to perfume!Husband ne jal ke kaha,dozakh jaon to kia
bhejon?Wife:APNI VIDEO.
-Jab Sher (Lion) 3 dafa Dahaarta hai to kya hota hai?...Think.....Any Guess?......Ok I WiLL TeLL u...Tom & Jerry Cartoon
Shuru Hota Hai!;-)
-Jab hum roya karenge teri yadein dhoya karenge,Jub tak jiya karenge tujhe yaad kiya karenge,Hum mar bhi jaye to kya
hua,FARISHTON k mobile se SMS kiya karenge.
-Ho Nahi Sakta k Muhjy teri Yaad na aye, Bhool k b Bhulaon wo Waqt na aye, Tum Bhulo to Tumhen Agli Sans na aye,ma Bholon
to....Benda Bhool hi Jata hy
-Tum paas ayeyun muskurae..apne 32 daant mujhko dikhae!ab to mera Dil phoot phoot k rota hai..yar tumse to brush bhi theek se
nahi hota hai!
-Today i have not sent Sms 2 anybody Except U.Today i have not thought about anybody Except U.BcozmyPolicy isOne day One
Fool.....;-)
-LOVE is IODEX."Ooh ah ouch dur kary"LOVE is SUPREEME."Yehi to hai wo apna paan"LOVE is HABIB COOKING OIL."Q K yeh dil ka
mamla hai".LOVE is GOLD LEAF " Sehat k liye muzzir hai ".LOVE is SUFI BANASPATI""Jo naam hai Aitemaad ka".LOVE is
disprin''bachon ki pohanc se dor rakhain''
-Pyar K Geet Gayen GayHum Tum,Apni Dunya Basaaen Gay Hum Tum,Jo Diye Bujh Gaey Hawaaon Se,Un Ko Bech Kr,PHiLiPS K BULB Layen
Gay Hum Tum
-A begger beg to me:Allah k naam pe kuch dede baba.I replied:Mere paas paise nahi hai,Ye sms parhne wale ko le
ja.Begger:Maine bheek mangi hai bhikari nahi;o)
-1 Boy apni GF k liye Chooriyan le k gyaGF: Khudhi pehna do.Boy: Mujhe nhi pata tha k itna acha response mile ga,warna mai
Kapre hi le aata.
-The latest Slogen of boys:Pakistan is our Nation,Girls are our Destination,Dating is our Occupation,Flirting is our
Profession,Bhar me jaye Education
-ZINDAGI k KATHHIN or DUSHWAAR raaston pay kon aap ka saath NIBHATA hai?Aap k dost?Ya phr, aap k relatives???G nahiSrf or srf
Aap ke CHAPPAL!
-Raatoon ko neend na aaye, din ko chain na aaye, jb hum ne RAB se poocha a RAB kia yahi pyaar hai,To RAB ne kaha nahi LIGHT
k bina sab ka yehi haal hai!;-)
-Musharraf to his Corps Commanders:What r your plans for Defence?Corps Commanders:Sir,We r soon going to start Phase 8 in
Defence Lahore..
-Other girl:Pehla Pehla pyar hai,Chali bhar hai,Aja sajna tera intezar haiNCA girl:Pehla pyar hai,Dusri/Tisri bar hai,Aj
Zyada sajna,verna dusra tyar hai
-Kahi andhaira to kahin shaam hogi meri har khushi tere nam hogi kuch mang k to dekho hum se ae dost Bijli Pani ka bill aur
karz mein dobi proprty tere nam hogi.
-If MOLVIS start film making,names of films will bIslam aya tm na aye,Kaho na Ramzan hai,Hum zakat de chuke sanam,Maseet mere
veer di,Kabhi roza kabhi namaz,Humari Tasbih apke paas hai,Imam banaya ap ne,Aa ab namaz parhein,Shaheed to hona hi
tha,Molana ap k hain kon,Paisy waly Hajj Kar jayenge.S
-Pathan ko uska sasur peet raha ta.Y?His wife gave birth of a Baby.Doctor sent him SMS"Mubark ho, aap baap ban gaye".Pathan
forwarded it to all his friends
--Dekhein tamasha! Meharban Qadardan
dekhein mere Sms ka kamal Tone bji, bandr ne mobile uthaya sms parhaor muskuraya Ab ye sms 4wrd karke hoshyari dikhaega :)
-What is the difference Between1) Call Girl 2) Girl Friend 3) Wife ? Ans: . . . .1) Prepaid 2) Postpaid 3) Unlimited.
-Congrats! Ur phone has been installed wth a new puzzle game.2 play..,Just throw ur cel phone against the wall & arrange the
pieces back.Its fun! Try it!
-Today's Titanic's 94 Anniversary,So Every True Lover Requested To Put Their Mobile Into Water For 2 Minutes,In MeMory Of
Jack And Rose.
-Hum jaise dost hote nahi sab k liye,Ye tohfa hai kisi kisi k liye,kyun jala rakhi hai shama bujha hi di jiye,Kiya hum kam
hain ROSHNI k liye.
-Hello: itna sannata kyun hai.?Kitni der se sms ki Ghanti nahi baji.?Kia Ye saare network fuse hogaey.?Ya muje sms krny walay
kanjos ho gay hain
-Le Kar Dil Wapas Kiya Nahi Jata..Yu Naazuk Dil Ko Zakham Diya Nhi Jata..Sach Much Ye Duniya Bohat Zalim Hai..SmS Sasta Hai
Phir Bhi Aap Se Ye Kiya Nahi Jata.
-Faqeer! 1 rupia de do.Bacha! TAMATAR khaao.F! 1 rupia de do.B!TAMATR khaao F! Kya matlab? Bachey ki maan boli ye TOTLA hai.
Kehta hai KAMA KER khaao.
-Rabba dukh na devin yaar mery nu...Sanno chahy dukhan da pahad dy dy...Phiry nawi SOHRAB CYCLE utty yar mera...Sannu pavein
purani HONDA VTI car dy dy;-
-U stolemy memories,i excused u!U stolemy laugh.I excused u!U stolemy smile,i excusedu!Btthis isToo muchmere doggy ki plate
to wapis karo yar :-D
-Zindagi mai Jab Tumko koi Rasta Dikhai Na De,koi Manzil Dikhai Na De,Koi Apna Dikai Na De,To Tm Mere Pas anamei TumkoEye
Specialist K Pas Le Jaun ga
-Suno,Mehsos karo,Badal ki GARAJ,BIJLI ki chamak,Barish ki ik ik boond,Tum seCheekh cheekhKar keh rahi hai; ABEY Kalay AB TO
NAHA LAY
-Aj ka sawal?Mohabat ho jati hai,ya,karni parti hai?Very simple!......Khobsorat ho to ho jati hai'..agar ameer ho to karni
parti hai ;-) yes this is love
-Maine kaha Dil RubaUsne kaha balance bhijwaMaine kaha Paise NahiUsne kaha Kaise nahiMaine kaha Mehangai HaiUsne kaha Ja aaj
se tu mera bhai hai
-Q: Zamin pe rehny waley janwer bachy dety hanHawa me urny waley undy dety habt wo konsi chez hai jo hawa me b urti hai or
bachy b deti ha?.Ans:Air hostess.
-Teacher:Boys, aap ko aamir khan aur kajol ki film 'FANA' se kia lesson mila.?........Student:Andhi,looli,langri,jo bhi mile,
phasa le bhai! :p
-A couple had a fight one night. When they were going to bed, Husband taunted: "Goodnite mother of 3 kids".Wife replied:-
"Good night Father of none".
-Aj ki khas khas khabrenGud Morning& hav a nice day,Or ab tafseel:Aj b rozana ki trah sms ki barish jari rahay gi,Call ane k
b imkan hai orMiscals k badal b kafi mobiles pe chaye rahenge,Aj pore din bar bar vibration k jhatky lagte rahe ge, Mazid
khabron k liye dekhty rahen mere sms,Shukria
-Many Many HAPPY Returns Of The Day 2 You...Dekha aap ne Kya Socha Tha?K ap Nhi BataoGay To Mjhe Pata Nhi Lage Ga Ki
Aaj...?ANIMALS DAY Ha.
-Na pyar, na yar,Na mohbt, na dosti yaro,Aj k is devdas ki bat mano,Na chandrmukhi, na paro,Bs har larki ko line maro HAPPY
POONDI day.
-Mom:Beta Q ro rhe ho?Beta:Teacher ne mara ha..Mom:Q Mara?Beta:Maine unhy MURGI kaha tha..Mom:Q kaha?Beta: unho ne mujhe test
me ANDA jo dya tha.
-Student ask Teacher sir monkey aur donkey mei kya farak hai?TEACHER,agar msg pherne wala hans pare to M0NKEY agar na hanse
to DONKEY.
-1 bacha paida hote hi nurse se bola mobile hai kya? nurse boli hai lekin karega kya? bacha: kuch nahi bs wo GOD ko mis cal
krni hai k me pohanch gaya hun ;-)
-Why is "SINGH" Added to Every Sardars Name ?Because Of Its Hidden Meaning :
S - Sala
I - Insaan
N - Nahi
G - Gadha
H - Hai
-Yestrdy my mobile have accident with MOTOROLA and admitted to LG hospital near SAMSUNG chowk.Dr.NOKIA said"Matter is
serious.Sms needed"So plz donate SMS.
-How romantic jatt will propose a girl?Teri boothi local bus vargi Mera ticket katuan nu je kardaTeri taur ni sohnye maj
vargi Mera sangal pan nu je karda..
-Philosophy of Boys:Flirt wid innocent grlsFrndship with Charming grlsContact with Cute grlsLove wth Sincere grlsAnd Marriage
with"JESI AMMI KI MERZI"
-Mujh se kya ghalti ho gai?Then y r u avoiding me? Atleast week mein ek dafa tou yad kr liya karoUr behaviour is really
hurting Me.With Loveur.BATH SOAP!
-Ishq da jis nu khawab aa janda way,Waqt ohda samjho kharab aa janda way,Mehboob ohda aavay ya na aavay,Taaray gin gin ohnu
hisaab aa janda way.
-Sitaron se aagay jahan aur bhi hain,Parosioo ki do Larkian aur bhi hain,Tu Nadan aik Biwi pe kahan Atak gaya,Shariyat main 3
Biwiyian aur bhi hain.
-2007 k bhikari: Amma thoda khana hai to do na...! Amma:- abhi nahi banaya hai...! Bhikaari:- to banane k baad missed call
de dena... ;->
-Tere te qurbaan sadi yari ay,Hass k mr jayiye iss di v tyari ay,eh silsila na khtam hovy apni yari da,assi tainu yaad
kita,chall hun tere vari ay
-Philosophy of Boys:Flirt wid innocent grlsFrndship with Charming grlsContact with Cute grlsLove wth Sincere grlsAnd Marriage
with"JESI AMMI KI MERZI"
-Bap bete se:Beta meri nasihat pe amal krna,kabhi shadi na krna. Beta:Theik hy papa! mein khud b amal
krun ga aur apne beton ko b kahun ga.
-Ab tak meri life khuli bottle thiIs may se sab perfume ki tarah urh jata thaPer ap k ane se sab sahi ho gayaALLAH karey ap
jaisa DHAKKAN sab ko miley.
-Election k zmane me 1 syastdan hospital me tehal rha tha.Nurse i mubark di,aur boli: apke 3 judwan bche hue hyn. Syastdan:ye
nhein ho skta....dobara ginti krwao
-Kafi arsay pehle ki baat hai.KMere "SMS" Sirf Ahmak aur Bewaqof parhtey they.Aur..Aur..Auraj tak ye silsila jari hai:-)
-Musharraf ki biwi pareshan hai.Musharraf: Kya hua kyon pareshan ho??Biwi: Didn't u see the newspaper?Benazir says I want
Musharraf without uniform ! -;)
-Ae Dost Tu B Likha Kar Shayari... Meri Tarah Tera B Naam Ho jaey ga..Log Phenkain ge Anday Aur Timator...To Sham ki Sabzi ka
Intizam Ho Jaey ga!
-Dil ka dard dil tornay wala kya jane,pyar ke riwajon ko zamana kiya jane,Hoti hai kitni takleef bachi phasanay main,ye ghar
betha bachi ka baap kiya jane..$
-Haqeeqat samjho ya afsaanaApna samjho ya beganaHamara aapka rishta hai puranaIs liye farz tha aapko batanaK Garmi aa gai hai
Ab shuroo ker do nahana!!
-Sardar proposed girl with romentic poetryKutta mar gaya razai meMain pagal hoon teri judai meGobar pay machar beth nahi
saktaSardar tery bin reh nai sakta
-Ghalib ne apni girl Friend ko date pr bulaya wo late hogaiGirl: Am i late?Ghalib: Falak pe sitaro ko nend arahi hyDusri ka
time ho gaya or tu ab Aarahi hy?
Roshni dekar doob jana koi suraj se sikhay...........
Dil dekar dard leana koi hum se sikhay..........
Dil lekar kuch na dena koi unse sikhay.........
mail per kar jawab na dena koi app sa sikhay
hahahahahahahahaha
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
---
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
---
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
Toot Jaate Hain Sabhi Rishte Magar
Dil Se Dil Ka Rishta Apni Jagah
Dil Ko Hai Tujh Se Na Milne Ka Yaqeen
Tujh Se Milne Ki Dua Apni Jagah
---
Mast Nazron se dekh lenaa tha..
Agar tamanna thi Aazmane ki..
Hum to Behosh Yun hi ho jaate..
Kya zaroorat thi muskurane ki..
---
Chehrey Per Banawat Ka Gussa,
Aankhon Say Chalakta Pyar Bhi Hai,
Is Shauq-E-Ada Ko Kya Kahiye
Inkar Bhi Hai Iqraar Bhi Hai.
---
Raat bhar jaagi ho jiske sapno mein,
kaise kho gaya wo raat ke andhero mein,
Dhoondti rahi tum mujhe, dil ke kisi kone mein
main bas raha hoon, tumhari dhadkano mein, tumhari saanso mein
Main chup hi sahi, magar magroor nahin
Ek khamoshi hi sahi magar, koi shikwa nahin
Na tumse koi shikwa hai jaanam, na koi naraazgi
ye dil ka lagana hai jaanam, nahin koi dil lagi.....!!!
---
Sapna to bas sapna hai,
Sapno mein keya jeena,
Subha ki phali kiran sai seekho,
Is jeevan ko jeena.
---
Dil kai kone ko chordo,
hansti duniya mein aao,
kisi ko man ka meet banalo,
khushion kai phool khilao.
---
chupai huai magroor ko chordo,
chordo shkway narazee ko,
tord do pinjra - urd kar dhundo,
apnay jeewan sathi ko.
---
Na dekha karo tum humein, teerchhi nazaron se is tarah
ke jaan jaati hai jism se, neend aankhon se jis tarah
Aaankhein hai ye tumhari, ya shab e maikhana
main hosh jo kho doon, mujhe hosh mein na lana
Dekha jo tumne pyar se, wafa ka izhaar hua
paya jo tumhein zindgi mein, mohabbat ka ikraar hua
Khoya jo tumhein, ik aah nikli is dil se
dil ko jala gayi, ik bijli is dil se
Ab na aao khwaabon mein tum, kahin neend se na jagoon
main zinda hi kab tha, kahin maut se na jagoon.....!!
---
Zindgi mein to tumhari aa na sake, ab khwaabon mein chale aate hain
Tum laakh nazrein pher lo sanam, hum phir bhi chale aate hain
Kahne ko to tum bhul chuki thi, phir bhi anjaane mein pukarti ho
Tum kabhi bhuli nahin thi, sirf jaankar anjaane mein pukarti ho
Mann to mann hai, mann ko kya kahena
hum aayenge sapno mein, sapno ko kya kahena
---
Yaad rahe jaati hai, aur waqt guzar jata hai
Phool khilta hai aur khil ke bikhar jata hai,
Phool se kya gila, jab phool mein khushboo nahin
Apno se kya gila, jab apno mein mohabbat nahin,
Mohabbat na sahi, hum phir bhi jee lete hain
Zindgi zaher hi sahi, hum phir bhi pee lete hain....
---
bandagi hai khuda ki, khuda ka hai noor
heeron mein yeh heera hai, nooron mein kohinoor
kitno ko katl kiya isne, kitno ko kiya majboor
dilwlaon ka hai aasra, jab voh hote hain door
judai mein dilbar ki, yeh ban jaati hai nasoor
---
Kaise bataun mein kya chiz mohabbat hoti hai
pooncho yeh usse, jisko mohabbat hoti hai
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panw me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo jara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le zalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
---
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
---
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
---
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
---
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
---
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
chand ko sitoron se or mujhe tum se mohabbet hai
phoolon ko baharon se or mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
mefil main jo milna nighahen jhukalena
koi samajh na pai ke mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
ab tere hijr main bus ek kaam hai asman takna
tum sitaron pe likh dena mujhe tum se mohabbat
hai hamain ehsas hai tum ko bhi ham se pyaar hai lekin
yeh mere roohbarooh kehna mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
---
:Larkiyo Main Kia Rak..:
KATAL KERNA HAI TO KHANGER SAY KERO ,
TALWAAR MEIN KIYA REKHA HAI,
ISHQ KERNA HAI TO KHUDA SAY KERO ,
LERKIYON MEIN KIYA REKHA HAI..........!
PHOOLON KAY BAAGO MEIN MERA INTEZAR KERNA ,
MEIN NA AAO TO GADAY SAY PIYAAR KERNA.....!
CHAT PATI HALEEM MEIN LEEMBU NICHOR DUN,
DIL TO CHAHTA HAI TERA MU TOR DUN.....!
---
:Tafreeh:
Apni Zouja kay Taruf main kaha aik shaks nay
Dil say in ka mutarf hoon main zabani hi sahi
Chaye bhi achi banati hayn meri begam magar
Moo bananay main to in ka koi saani hi nahi
Jab say Aienak lagi nazroon wali
Zehar lagnay lagi hay ghar wali
Hay mezbaani ka ye takaza, kay aaye mehmaan to muskura do
Magar tabiyat ye chahti hay galay milo or gala daba do
Agar gussa hi karna hay to gussa is kadar karlo
Tumhara moon jidhar hay peeth bhi apni udhar karlo
---
:Larkiya:
hazaroo larkia asi ke har larki pay dam nikle
jis larki pay dam nikle wo larki ghar se kam nikle
phool kharab nahi hota makhia kharab karti hai
larka kharab nahi hota larkia kharab karti hai
himmat hai to duniya se bagawat karlo
warna jaha maabap bolay waha shaadi karlo
---
:Doobte ko tinkey ka:
doob te ko tinkay ka sahara chahye
shadi k liay behnon ka ek ishara chahye
hazar nuks nikalti hain larke k chahre main
koi pooche to un se kia sitara chahye
chaar shararon se baat nahi banne wali
saath main to un ko ek khatara chahye
behno! karo khayal kam hogaye hain baal
warna kahen ge woh larka hamen karara chahye
kitni bar kaha baaji larki hai yehi behter
mughay bhi to aakhir gunahon ka kuffara chahye
tum bhi sunlo larki walon yeh daastaaan
phir na kehna hamen interview doobara chahye
ab to reh guzar main aakay par gaya hoon
le jao jis ko bhi yeh baaboo bichara chahye
kion dikhayi larki walon ki itni sharafat jawed
woh kehte hain hamen larka thora aawara chahye
---
:Software Ke Phool:
Imagine Guru Dutt after working for few months in Software Industry would
make a movie "software kephool" & include this song:
yeh document, yeh meetings, yeh features ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman, cursors ki duniya
yeh deadlines ke bhooke, management ki duniya;
yeh Product agar ban bhi jaaye to kya hai?
Yahaan ek khilona hai programmer ki hasti
ye basti hai murda bug-fixers ki basti
yahaan par to raises hai, inflation se sasti
yeh Review agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
har ek keyboard ghayal, har ek login pyaasi
excel mein uljhan, winword mein udaasi
yeh office hai ya aalame microsoft ki
yeh Release agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?
jalaa do ise, phoonk daalo yeh monitor
mere saamne se hataa daalo yeh modem
tumhaara hai tumhi sambhaalo yeh computer
yeh Product agar chal bhi jaaye to kya hai?
---
Apni aaisee wife ho,.
5'6" jiski height ho,
Jeans tight tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 27 ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
Sadak per sab kaheN kya cute ho,
Bhir me sab kaheN side ho, side ho,
Pindi, Islamabad ya Peshawar ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki khidmat jiski khwahish ho
Aisi apni Wife ho.
Padosi jab baat karay to haath me knife ho,
Dinner ke waqt candle light ho,
Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milnay ke baad dil delight ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.
---
EK LADKA THA............
ek ladka tha dewana sa
net use kya karta tha
chori chori chopkay chopkay Email likha karta tha
messenger use kar na tha os ko
password hack honay say darta tha
jab bhi milta tha mujhsay...
mujsay poocha karta tha yeh password hack kesay hota hai
yeh password hack kesay hota hai........
aur main yeh hi keh pati theen..........
messenger khola ho ya band
password tu hack hota hai
kesay khahon main oo yaraa yeh password kesay hack hota hai .......
ajj hi yaroo kisi ko hack kar kay dhekhey gay hum
hacking hoti hai kesay kar kay dhekhey gay hum
kis kay messenger main add huway buddies ko hum nay choraliye
kisi kay inbox ki email hum nay oradiye
aay yaar net pay koi kisi ka na hota hai
kesay kahoon main oo yaraa yeh password kesay hack hota hai
kya yeh hai chatting ka jaduu jab koi sign in hota hai
block kar kay sub females kay peechay hota hai
door kaheen computer par banay ladkiyan kun janay koi hacker kab kesay kahan milay
jo asl chat pay hoo likha woo aksar hi jhot hota hai
kesay kahoon main oo yara yeh password kesay hack hota hai
---
FunnY Ashaars
neend mujhey raat bhar aati hai kam
shayad macharon ko bi mil gaya hai sanam
har pal mein sochta hon tum ko
kia karon koi aur kaam jo nehi hum ko
mein chahta hon tum koiss qadar
koi aur mil jaey tu dekhon naa mur kar
tujh bin zindagi ka tasawar hi nehi hai
tere sang ho zindagi aisa bi koi scene nehi hai
mohabbat hai mujh ko sirf tum sey sanam
sach keh raha hon mein tumhari qasam
jhot mein agar kahon tu, tu mar jaey
a kash mujh ko aishwarya mil jaey
iss dunya mein, tum he sab sey haseen ho
mein aur kahon jhot kitna, ke tum ko yaqeen ho
bas tere he sang jo meri zindagi
acha nehi ke mein kar lo khudhkoshi
rooz khawab mein nazar aatey ho tum
kio mujhey neend mein bi daratay ho tum
ab tu tere bin jeena ho gaya hai mushkil
haan ghar ke liye chahiye nokrani mustakil
dekho mujhey hai kitna pyar tum sey, ab tu haan karo
agar ab bi hai inkaar tu yeh letter agay pass karo
---
Aisa bhi nahi hai ke
I don't like your face
par dil ke storage mein
no more disk space
Ghar se jab tum nikale
pehen ke reshmi gown.
Jaane kitne dilon ka
ho gaya server down...
Jabse meri zindagi mein,
aayi hai ik female.
Bhool gaya hai sab kuchh
kya mailbox, kya e-mail...
Dil se ek ishq ki
application create kar raha hoon.
Pyaar se debug karna
mein wait kar raha hoon...
Tumhaare intezaar mein
neend aayee so gaya.
Yeh dekho mera connection
time out ho gaya...
Kal jab mile thhe
to dil mein hua ek sound.
Aur aaj mile to kehte hain
your file not found !
Jo muddat se hota aaya hai,
woh repeat kar doonga...
Tu naa mili to apni zindagi
ctrl+alt+delete kar doonga...
Shayad mere pyar ko
taste karna bhool gaye...
Dil sey aisa cut kiya
ke paste karna bhool gaye...
Laakhon honge nigaah mein
kabhi mujhe bhi pick karo...
Mere pyaar ke icon pe
kabhi to double-click karo...
Roz subha hum karte hain
pyar se unhe good morning...
Woh aise ghoor ke dekte hain
jaise 0 errors aur 5 warning...
Nazar mein to kai hain
aur shaayad lonely hain...
Problem yehi hai ki voh
ab read only hain...
---
mainay poocha chand say
dekha hai kahin maray yaar sa haseen
chand nay kaha
saale itnay upar say dikhta hai kya
Din ko chain nahi
Raat ko aram nahi.
Jee na lagay kahen
Aay khuda kya yahi pyar hai ?
Arey Pagal.. yeh pyar nahi ..... Aaj ka temperature 43
degree celcius hai.
My friend, the best quality that i like about u is that, U R very
sentimental .... (10% Senti and 90% Mental).
Dark were those days, without your sight.
When I was in darkness, you gave me light.
You gave me strength 2 make life bright.
Thank you so much PHILIPS TUBELIGHT
Khuda se Scooter manga.. Car di;
Apartment manga.. bangla diya;
dost manga to tumhain diya..
Khuda ne is bar aisa zulm kyoun kia
When I C the moon I C U
When I C the stars I C U
When I C the Sea I C U
Get out of the way you are blocking my view.
I mixed RUM in water and got drunk.
I mixed BRANDY in water and got drunk.
I mixed WHISKY in water and got drunk again.
Now I have decided never to drink water again !!!
Zindagi mein tum bohat aage jaaoo gay
kyonkay jahan bhi tum jaooge
sab kahain gay, chal be chal aagay chal.
FLATTERED...?. Don't Be, it was sent to me, I just wanted you to read it.
From Monday to Sunday
From January To December
From birth till my death
My feelings for you have never changed.
For me, you've always been........... a headache
---
*~ Type Of Girls ~*
HARD-DISK Girls:
She remembers everything, FOREVER.
RAM Girls:
She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.
WINDOWS Girls:
Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her.
SCREENSAVER Girls:
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!
INTERNET Girls:
Difficult to access.
SERVER Girls:
Always busy when you need her.
MULTIMEDIA Girls:
She makes horrible things look beautiful.
CD-ROM Girls:
She is always faster and faster.
E-MAIL Girls:
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.
VIRUS Girls:
Also known as "WIFE"; when you are not expecting her, she
comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don't try to
uninstall her you will lose everything............
---
When i Die , bury me deep
Ten feet down fast as leep
Place my Maths book on my head
Tell my teacher that i am dead
place my geography book on my chest
Tell my teacher how i am at rest
Place my physics in my right hand
Tell my teacher nothing i understand
place my english book on my left
Tell my teacher i tried my best
Also tell my teachers not to cry
For they are those who made me die
---
Two little babies were sitting in their cribs,
when one baby shouted to the other, "Are you a little girl or a
little boy?"
"I don't know," replied the other baby giggling.
"What do you mean, you don't know?" said the first baby.
"I mean I don't know how to tell the difference," was the reply.
"Well, I do," said the first baby chuckling, "I'll climb into your
crib and find out."
He carefully maneuvered himself into the other baby's crib,
then quickly disappeared beneath the blankets.
After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his
face.
"You're a little girl, and I'm a little boy," he said proudly.
"You're ever so clever," cooed the baby girl,
"but how can you tell?" "It's quite easy really," replied the baby
boy,
"you've got pink socks and I've got blue ones.
" SHAME ON YOU, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???
---
Larka:
Sochti Hai Zyada, Kam Woh Samajti Hai
Dil Kuch Kehta Hai, Kuch Aur Hi Karti Hai
Larki Kyon Na Jaane Kyon Larkon Si Nahin Hoti!
Pyaar Usse Bhi Hai Magar Shuruaat Tumhi Se Chahe
Khud Mein Ulji Ulji Hai Par Baalon Ko Suljaayein
Hum Achey Dost Hai Par Uss Nazar Se Tumko Dekha Nahin
Woh Sab To Teek Hai Par Uss Bare Mein Maine Socha Nahin
Sab Se Alag Ho Tum Yeh Ke Ke Paas Tumhaare Aaye
Aur Kuch Din Mein Tum Mein Alag Sa Kuch Bhi Na Usko Paye
Uff Yeh Kaisi Shirt Pehante Ho
Yeh Kaise Baal Katate Ho
Gaari Tez Chalate Ho
Tum Jaldi Mein Kyo Khaate Ho
Tumhe Badalne Ko Paas Woh Aati Hai
Tumhe Mitaane Ko jaal Bichati Hai
Baaton Baaton Mein Tumhe Phasati Hai
Pehle Hansati Hai, Phir Bara Rulaati Hai
Larki Kyon Na Jaane Kyon Larkon Si Nahin Hoti!
Larki:
Eh Itna Hi Khudh Se Khush Ho To Peeche Kyon Aate Ho
Phool Kabhi To Hazar Tohfe Akhir Kyon Laate Ho
Apna Naam Nahin Bataya Aapne
Coffee Peene Chalenge
Main Aapko Ghar Chor Doon
Phir Kab Milen ge
Bikhra Bikhra Be Matlab Sa Toota Phoota Jeena
Aur Kehte Ho Alag Se Hain Hum Taan Ke Apna Seena
Bheega Tolya Kahin Farsh Pe
Toothpaste Ka Dakhan Kahin
Kal Ke Mauze Ulat Ke Pehne
Waqt Ka Khuch Bhi Hosh Nahin
Jeena Ka Tumko Dhang Sikhlati Hai
Tumhe Jaanwar Se Insaan Banaati Hai
Uske Bina Ek Pal Rehna Sakoge Tum
Usko Pata Hai Yeh Keh Na Sakoge Tum
Iss Liye Larkiya, Larko Si Nahin Hoti
Larka:
Jane Kon Kon Se Din Wo Tumko Yaad Dilaye
Pyaar Ko Chahe Bhool Bhi Jaaye
Taareekhein Na Bhoolaye
First March Ko Nazar Milaayee
Chaar April Ko Main Milne Aayee
Ikees May Ko Tumne Chuwa Tha
Chey June Muje Kuch Huwa Tha
Larki:
Larko Ka Kya Hai Kissi Bhi Mor Pe Woh Mur Jaayein
Abhi Kissi Ke Hai Abhi Kissi Aur Se Woh Jur Jaayein
Tumhaare Mummy Daddy Ghar Par Nahin Hai
Great... Main Aaa Jaon?
Tumhaari Friend Akeli Ghar Jaa Rahi Hai
Bechari... Main Chod Aaon... UFFFF
Larka:
Ek Haan Kehne Ko Kitna Tehlati Hai
Thak Jaate Hai Hum Woh Jee Behlati Hai
Larki:
Woh Sharmati Hai Kabhi Chupati Hai
Larki Jo Haan Kehde Usse Nibhati Hai
Iss Liye Larkiya, Larko Si Nahin Hoti
Larka:
Alright Alright Iss Mein Jagarne Ki Kya Baat Hai Yaar
Larki:
Pehle Pehle Bhanawre Jaise Aas Paas Mandlaye
Phir Busy Hoon Keh kar Tumko Woh Tarkaye
Samja Karo Darling Aaj Bohat Kaam Hai
Door Hua To Kya Dil Mein Tumhaara Naam Hai
Jiss Chehre Par Marte Hai Woh Boring Ho Jaaye
Kuch Hi Din Mein Nazrein Inki Idhar Udhar Mandlain
Sirf Pyaar Se Zindagi Nahin Chalti
Tum Interior Decoration Ka Course Kyon Nahin Karti
kyoon kaise lagi larka larki k darmyaan nok jhok bye
---
DeAr FriEnDs!!!
MUNNA HAI KIYA???
Call an unknown phone number and ask, "Munna hai kya?"
{Whoever picks up the phone} will say, " No wrong number".
Again call after five-min, "Munna hai kya?"
She will reasonably be annoyed and say, "No this is wrong number".
Again call, "Munna aa gaya kya?"
She will say, "Aap ka dimaagh kharaab hai kya?! Kiyun peechhay paray ho?!"
Again call after five-min, " Munna ko phone dena."
She will cry with all ‘gaaleees’.
Then you just drop the phone.
Call after another five-min,
"Main Munna bol raha hoon, mera koi phone to nahi aya na?
---
Makan Malik: Sir 500 Kiraya hoga.
Kirayedar : Theek Hai, Par Aap ke Makaan Mein Chuhey Nach Rahen Hain.
Makan Malik: Abey Uloo, 500 Mein Chuhey Nahi To Kya Urmila Nachegi
Wife: Mere Irade Bade Nek Hai, Aap 1000 Mein Ek Hain...
Sardar: Mera Dimag Bada Tez Hai, Pehle Yeh Bata, Baki 999 Kaun Hai...
Basanti: Bhag Dhanno Aaj Teri Basanti Ki Izzat Ka Sawaal Hai.
Dhanno : Teri Izzat Gayi bhaa mai mere peeche gabbar ke ghore pare hai
Aaj kal dil chah raha hai ki main tumhe kabhi bhi mauka dekh ke sab ke
samne 1 ki ki kis kiss kissa sunau
Log kahete hai ki Ladkiyan zindgi hoti hai, Maut nahi...
Magar woh log yeh kyu bhul jate hai ki, dhokha bhi zindgi hi deti hai, maut nahi....
Boy : Jaan-e-man... is dil me aaja na!
Girl : Sandal nikalu kya?
Boy : Pagli, yeh masjid nahi hai aise hi aaja
ek tum ho jo iTNey acchey ho,
ek tum ho jo kitney pyarey ho,
ek tum ho jo kitney sundar ho,
ek tum ho jo chand sitare ho,
Aur ek hum hain, jo jooth boley jaa rahey hain...
Woh gori hai uski zulfen hain kali,
Wo Pari hai ya Pariyo ki Rani,
Uski har baat hai nirali,
Par kya karu yaaro wo larki kisi aur ne pata li!
Chaand ko garoor hai ki uske paas noor hai,
to kya hua....
Mujhe bhi garoor hai ki mera Dost Langoor hai!
ha ha ha ha!!!!
Har Karz dosti ka ada kon karega,
Jab hum na rahe to dosti kon karega,
ae khuda mere dosto ko salamat rakhna,
Warna meri shaadi mein dance kon karega??
Aahat si koi aye to lagta hai ki tum ho.
Hawa koi lehrayi to lagta hai ki tum ho.
Ab tum hi batao, kya tum kisi BHOOT se kam ho ?
Dabbay mein dabba...Dabbay mein Khargosh !
Larki ne ankh mari larka behosh !!!
Humne bhi pyar kiya tha zindgi main,badi joshh ke sath !
Humne bhi pyar kiya tha zindgi main,badi shhor ke sath !
Aab hum pyar karenge badi soch ke sath !
Kyon ki usey kal shaamko dekha kisi aur ke sath
Ghunghat Mein Tujhe Dekha To Deewana Hua,
Sangeet Ka Taraana Hua,
Shamaa Ka Parwana Hua,
Masti Ka mastaana Hua,
Jaise Hi Ghunghat Uthaya Is Duniya Se Ravana Hua
Ek Ladki Ko Dekha To Aisa Laga
Doosri Ladki Ko Dekha To Vaisa Laga
Jab Dono Ke Joote Lage...To Ek Jaisa Laga!!!
Bewafa Tum Ho To Wafadaar Hum Bhi Nahi,
Besharam Tum Ho To Sharamdaar Hum Bhi Nahi,
Pyaar Ke Is Mode Par Aake Kehte Ho Shadi shuda Ho
To Kya Hua Darling...Kunware Hum Bhi Nahin!
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Ye line samajh me aaye to mujhe zaroor batana
---
Short jokes
Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
Son : Well, where did you get mummy then?
---
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask I can take this train to Kuala Lumpur.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
---
Peter : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Kirk : Yes it's really strange. I' ve got another pair of the same at home.
---
Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.
---
Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Penang in two days time?
Post Master : Well it might do.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Johor.
---
Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first
---
kon kheta hai khe hum,piyar mai pakree jaye ge
waqat ane per bhen bhai ban jaye ge
tere husan ke kiya tarief karoo bander jesa tera mooon
tere zulfoo ke kiya kehne tere ek ke bal pee joon
haate ne kaha hatniee ke kaber pee ja ker
sadkyy jaoo terye patle kamer per
tum bhe bee sahara hum bhe bee shara
fitye mooon tumhara fitye humara
dil ke armaa ansuoo mai bhe gaye
un ke bachee hume mamo khe gaye
ishaq ke smander mai guta lgaya
ppane buhat thanda tha mai bahir nikal aya
in ke galee se ghuzre ajab itfaq tha
unhoo ne phool phenka gamla bhe sath tha
---
ARZO=
rang khusboo,gulab dee mugh ki
iss dwa mai ajab aser aya
mai ne pholoo ke arzoo ke the
ankh mai motiya uter aya
---
Colleg mai=
professer he jab ate hoo hafta war colleg mai
tu uncha kiun na hoo taleem ka miyaar colleg mai
ager chhe dusre mashroob bhe mehnge nahe milte
mager chalta hai akser sharbaat dedar colleg mai
wo degree ke bjaye maimm le ker lott aya hai
mila tha dakhla jis ko samander par colleg mai
mughe daar hai khe kahe donno kahe samdhee na ban jaye
mera gunar colleg mai tera gulzar colleg mai
---
Akkabee rooh=
edher jhiptee udher palte usee jakraa usee pakra
lahoo ko garam rakhne ke bhanee hai urranoo mai
her ek larkenazar ate hai in ko fakhta jese
"akkabe ruhh jab bedar hote hai jawanoo mai"
---
Drawing=
ahh bherte hoee aye ho"slming senter"
"ah ko chahye ek umer aser honee tak"
"drawing"khel nahe chand dinoo ka begam
eek sade chahiye kamre ko kamer hone tak
---
Gham zada haseena=
kiun bhujate hoo diya ulfat ka phooka mar ke
chahta hai dil mera ro waa mai koka mar ke
---
Choote=
mere mehbobiyat mai agaye ik geer muslim bhe
ye socha ha khe de doo iss rukh gunar ko choote
mager msayeel ye hai mulaqat iss se kese hoo
mughe jumee ko milte hai usee etwar ko choote
---
Jald Baze=
zara isee jald baze ke bdoolat
tumhara sab ujala khoo giya na
kaha se laye ho kale see bewee
andhera he andhera ho giya na
---
BOLTA HAI=
muun mai rakh ke paan jo bolta hai
jane kese zuban bollta hai
hum bhe bolle gay iss terha pashtoo
jese urdu pathan bolta hai
wo jo ullo tha urrh giya kab ka
ab u khale makan bolta hai
call usee ke tu ye sdda aye
hum tera abba jaan bolta hai
---
LAFFAFA=
laffafa khubsurat or dilkash tha jo kal pohncha
wo kertass hasseen dil se lga lene ke kabil tha
mai samjha tha mere mariyam ne mugh ko yaad farmaya hai
lapak ker jaab usee khoola tu dekha gess ka bill tha
---
Lasane znanee=
apne zoja ke taruof mai kaha ek shakhas ne
dil see unn ka matruff hoo mai zubane he nahe
chaye bhe achee bnate hai mere begaam mager
muun bnane mai tu un ka koye sane he nahe
---
Kttaa=
"sahab zadee karte kiya hai?"larke waloo ne pucha
"jab dekhoo farigh phirtee hai ya petee tambakoo hai"
larke ke ama ye bolee...kam kare uss ke jotee
"doo bhai bhatta lete hai, aba kher se dakoo hai!"
---
HISTORY=
choor litreature ko apne history ko bhool ja
shekh-o-masjid se taluq turq ker school ja
char din ke zindgee hai,kofaat se faeeda
kha double rote,klarkee ker,khushee se phool ja
---
POLICE=
kiya kramat hai guftugoo mai police waloo ke
wo parsaoo ko bhe gunhegar bna det hai
in ke lathee mai hai bangaal ka jadoo
joo goongee ko bhe gulokar bna deta hai
---
Fane khrabe=
ishaq mai fane khrabe ke sabab
munkata he ho giya sab silsila
is terha tuta hai un se wasta
jis terha T.V mai tutte rabtee
---
Hassab Kitaab=
mile jo pheli ko tankhwa race mai hare
"gunwaa ke aya kaha hai mughe jawab tu de"
kaha bewee ne jal ker"ye ke hai kiss ke nazar?
tuu pesee girne nahe deta na de hassab tu de"
---
Jhoota Mehboob=
tum rakh sake na pass zara apne koul ka
iss baar bhe badal gaye her baar ke terha
wada kiya tha raat ko ane ka per na aye
jhoote ho tum bhe sham ke akhbar ke terha
---
Bayaq Waqat=
edher hum se mehfill mai nazree larana
udher geer ko dekh ker muskrana
ye bhengee nazar ka na ho shakhsana
"kahe pe nigahee" "kahe pe nishana"
---
Mamoo=
na kam muhabbat ka her ik dukh sehna
her hal mai anjam se derte rehna
qudraat ka bara intkam hai jede
mehbooba ke ullad ka "Mamoo"khena!
---
Modren Ishaq=
or bhe cheeze buhat se luut chuke hai dil ke sath
ye btaya dostoo ne ishaq fermane ke baad
iss liye kamre ke ik ik cheez check kerta hoo mai
"ik tere ane see pehle ik tere jane ke baad"
---
^^**Mehngaye**^^
sab ke nazroo e giraya mughe mehngaye ne esa dewana bnaya mughe mehngaye ne
mere joore ke slaye mere biwee ne ke ye bhe ejaz dekhaya mughe mehngaye ne
her kadam per rah hastee mai muhabbat ke ik niya roog lagaya mughe mehngaye ne
kuch tu gurbaat ne mera chenn curaya yaroo or kuch naach nachaya mughe mehngaye ne
kabhe lela ke muhabbat ne uraye the hoosh aj dewaan bnaya mughe mehngaye ne
doodh wale ne gere baan mera phar diya ye tammasha bhe dekhaya mehngaye nee
saal bhe farme murghee ke siwaa khane mai or kuch bhe na khalaya mughe mehngaye ne
jese bachee kise pagal ko satayee saqib raat din esee staya mughe mehngaye ne
---
Woh bhi kiya Din thay
jab ham Jin:@ ) thay
Ab ham dayo hain
Jin k payo hain
---
tu mere dil mai ese smayee.........
jese bajree ke khet mai bhenss ghuss aye hai
galib ne likha dewar per lal rang se
yaha likhna manna hai...............
jab pearat kachree mai gira...sparoow bole
koye baat nahe...(Surf excel)hai na..............
majnoo lela ke baall paker ke bola......
moeee kitne din se sir nahe dhoya......
hum ap ke dil mai rehte hai.......
or kraya bhe nahe detee........
tum ko dekha tu ye khiyal aya..........
khe kal raat ko mai ne etna kiun khaya......
aee husan ke malka or bharoo ke shan
jese jawan...jese kisan.....
---
(*) Safaid kapre per se Rooshnaii walai dhabbe ki jaga ko kenchi se kaat dein..daagh hamesha keliye door hujai ga !!!
(*) Shakker ki booriu per Lafz "Namak" likh dene se woh chiontion se mehfooz rehti hai..
(*) Plastic ke berten per dhabbe per jain..tu is berten ko jalte hue chulai per rakh dene se dhabba berten samaid khatam
hujain gen..
(*) Nakhunon ko her rooz pandra minute tak reti se ragerne ke bad namak ka taizaab dalne se woh khoobsurat aur chamakdar
hujate hain..
(*) Pakai hue Salan main Sabun ki ek tikia dalne se Salen kabhi khatam na huga..Aur khushboo daar hujai ga..Sabun bashertyeke
Imported hu..
(*) Kacche rangon walai kapre agr bager Paani ke dhoyen tu inke raang kabhi nahin uterte..
---
READ N ENJOY!
1)
The night was dark, the moon was high,
I stopped my car....u wondered why?
I leant so close, u felt shy.
I uttered those three words....
I ......la.......puncture !!
2)
Friends r like mirrors, they r our reflection.
You r damn lucky I look good !!!!
3)
You = cute
You = hot
You = sweet
You = intelligent
You = amazing
You = perfect
Me = liar.
4)
I have a confession to make, ever since I have known u,
Its kinda hard for me to forget u.
Every night u appear in my dreams, And I find my self shouting.....
BHOOT !!! BHOOT !!!
5)
I look at the stars, the stars r beautiful
Then I look at you......
I ......
I .......
I rather look at the stars again. *****
6)
Look at the world as one big chocolate cake.
It would never be complete without few sweets n nuts.
Sweets like ME and nuts like YOU.
7)
U r 100% beautiful, u r 100% lucky
u r 100% sweet , u r 100% nice, and u r 100% stupid to believe these words
8)
Good looking people r hard to find.
That's why u don't ......
That's y u don't see me often.
9)
A good speech should b like a women's skirt...
Long enough to cover the subject,
And short enough to create interest.
10)
When u feel sad....
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say, "damn I am really sooo cute" u will overcome ur sadness.
But don't make this a habit.....
Coz liars go to hell !!!!
---
Difference between boys and girls while using ATM
(Bank's cash dispenser machines)
Boys:
1. Drive to the bank, park and go to the Cash
Dispenser.
2. Insert card
3. Dial code and desired amount
4. Take the cash, the card and the slip
Girls:
1. Drive to the bank
2. Engine stalled
3. Check make-up in the mirror
4. Apply perfume
5. Manually check haircut
6. Park the car - failure
7. Park the car - failure
8. Park the car - Success
9. Search for the card in the handbag
10. Insert card, rejected by the machine
11. Throw phone card back in handbag,
12. Look for bank card.
13. Insert Card
14. Look for Secret Box (where secret code is written)
in Handbag
15. Enter code
16. Study instructions for 2 minutes
17. #Cancel#
18. Re-enter code
19. #Cancel#
20. Call Boyfriend/husband to get correct the code
21. Enter desired amount
22. #Error#
23. Enter bigger amount
24. #Error#
25. Enter maximum amount
26. Cross fingers
27. Take cash
28. Go back to the car
29. Check make up in rear mirror
30. Look for keys in handbag
31. Start car
32. Drive 50 meters
33. STOP
34. Drive back to bank machine
35. Go out of the car
36. Take card and ticket back from machine
37. Go back to the car
38. Throw card on passenger seat
39. Throw slip on the floor
40. Check make up in rear mirror
41. Manually check haircut
42. Go into roundabout - wrong way
43. BRAKE
44. Go into roundabout - right way
45. Drive 5 kilometers
46. Remove hand brake
47. Call boyfriend/husband to tell how miserable she
was because of HIM.
Sorry girls, if umind
---
Shaadi ke Pehle / Shaadi ke Baad
Shaadi ke Pehle
Agar Tum Hotey
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Agar Tum Na Hotey
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Maine Pyar Kiya
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Ye Maine Kya Kiya?
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Kuch Nahi Hota Hai
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Dil To Pagal Hai
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Dil To Pagal Tha
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Ek Duje Ke Liye
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Chandramukhi
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Jwaalamukhi
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kuwara Baap
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Bechara Baap
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Titanic
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Mortgage
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Hum Aapke Hain Koun?
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Barbadi Key Kaaran
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Yes Boss
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Yes Boss
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Mere Sapnoon Ki Rani
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Chutki Ki Amma
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Kabhi Kabhi
--
Shaadi ke Baad
If You Are Lucky
===============
Shaadi ke Pehle
Aao Pyar Karen
--
Shaadi ke Baad
Aur Bhi Kuch Kaam Karain
---
kaisay bataoon key tum merai kaun hoo,
walls ki ice cream ho polka ki kon ho,
kesey bataoon key tum poorani dheet ho aik bohat bari phateek ho ,
tum orangi tum korangi tum hi ho meri nagan chowrangi ,
liyari ki tum Football ho kimari ka tum bund ho manora ki tum thand ho,
tum kharadar tum methadar tum hi meray liye goolimar ho
tumhi meri dhoti aur shalwar ho ,
tum hi gutka tum hi mempoori tum hi mix patti ka pan ho
kaisey bataon tumhay key tum meri koon ho
lalookhait main rehti ho tum khud ko defence ka kheti ho tum
lambi lambi chorti ho tum, hamesha sey ho khowar tum ,
ho sardi ka bhokhar tum shikarpur ka achar tum peshawar ki naswar tum
aur PIA ka jahaz ho jo kabhi waqt par nahi milti
wo parwaz ho jo hamesha short rehti hai wo piyas ho
mahengai kay is dor mey sawa rupey ki niyaz ho ,
aur mera aghaz tum mera anjam tum mera public evening special mera parcham
mera awaam tum ,
tum hi jurat ,tum hi ummat ,tum hi jasarat ,tum hi nowaey waqt , jang ho
aman ho,
the news ho ya dawn ho kesey batao key tum meri kon ho ,
key main rokta bus tum ko hoon, main tookta bus tum ko hooon,
tum hi mera kal thin ,tum hi mera aaj ho ,
tum hi marshallah ,tum hi jamhoriat , tum hi governer raj ho
aur meri TT tum ,mera Repeater tum ,mera Rokket Lunchar tum ,
tum hi meri soch ho meray paaon ki moch ho aur 9 rupees wali kouch ho
aur vespa main tum aur rakshey main tum, taxi main tum ,mazda main tum,
truck main tum troller main tum ,meri honda 50 tum, meri 70 tum,
lahore ka tanga ho tum, sukhur ki suzuki ho tum
aur kya bataoon meri jaan tum meray liya kya ho
arey tum tu pora PAKISTAN ho karachi ki jaan ho aur W11 ki paihchan ho
kaisay bataoon key tum meray liye koon ho
---
HAREE MIRCHEE
---------------------
@=ager muhabbat andhee hote hai tu shade kiya hai?..............(ankhoo ka operastion)
@=dil ka dora parne se dulhaa halak ho giya?................(ghoot ghoot ker jene se achanaak mer jana behter hai)
@=ek khatoon do meel pedal chal ker niya record kayeem kiya?.........(shoping center ke nam per chale ho ge)
@=kiya tum shade ke baad bhe itna piyaar karoo ge?........(shade kiya hai..mai tu tum se talaaq lene ke baad bhe itna piyaar
karoo ge)
@=her khud kushee ke pechee akhree hath orrat ka he nikle ga.
@=3 cheezoo se hamesha hoshiyar rahe(saamp,dushmaan,make up).
@=boy subhoo khirkee dekhte hai or girls ayeena(mirror)
@=mard bechare kiya kare jab fashtioneeorrtoo ke ankhoo mai saff likha hoo"lift plz".
@=in nojwanoo ka kon persaan hai jin se tohfee btoor btoor ker larkiya inhee kangaal ker dete hai.
@=duniya apne mehwaar per ruk sakte hai lekin apne nomayesh se baaz nahe a sakte.
@=azade naswaa ke baad ab hamee mardoo ke hakook ke khatir azadee merdaa ke tehreek chalana ho gee.
@=ek orrat ziyada se ziyada ek mard ka mustaqbil bna sakte hai or na kaam -o-namuraad bayaak waqat kayee ko sakte hai.
---
AP PUCHEE HUM BTAYEE
------------------------------
@=ager kisee ko dekh ker dil dharkna bhool jaye tu?.......(fiker maat kare idhee center ke phone sab ko zubane yaad hai).
@=khub surat larkiya ehmaak kiun hote hai?........(khub suraat is liye khe ap ko ache lagte hai ,or ehmaak ise liye khe ap
ache nahe lagte).
@=shade or khud koshe mai kiya fark hai?......(ziyada nahe' bus khud kushee mai insan forran maar jata hai).
@=shehnayee ke awaz mai dard kiun hota hai?........(dulhee ko khaber daar kerne ke liye'lekin is ko hoosh kaha hota hai).
@=orrat ke mohabbat mai mard ne TAJ MEHAL banwaya'merd ke mohabbat mai orrat ne kiya banwaya?........(banwaya nahe
banyaeee'kabristaan').
---
Why I am not studying???
Because :
No Study = Fail ....................... ( I )
Study = No Fail ...................... ( II )
By Combining ( I ) & ( II ) :
=====> ( No Study + Study ) = ( No Fail + Fail )
By Taking ( Study ) as a common factor in the left hand side
And Taking ( Fail ) as a common factor in the right hand side
=====> Study ( No + 1) = Fail (No + 1 )
By Dividing both sides by ( No + 1)
=====> Study = Fail
SO I ADVISE YOU TO STOP STUDING
---
1) Tujhe Dekha to yeh jana sanam ,
Pyar hota hai dewana sanam.
Kafia
Tujhe Dekha to yeh jana sanam ,
Chahiye roz ghis ghis ke nahana sanam.
---
2) Kabhi to nazar milao,
kabhi to kareeb aao,
jo nahi kaha hai,
kabhi to samajh bhi jao.
Kafia
Kabhi to naha ke aoo,
kabhi to perfume lagao,
kitna baar kaha hai,
mere paas na aaao.
---
3) Humain aur jeene ki chahat na hoti,
agar tum na hote , agar tum na hote.
Kafia
Humain aur nahane ki zaroorat na hoti
agar tum na hote, agar tum na hote
---
4) Kabhi Kabhi mere dil main khayal aata hai,
ke jaise tujh ko banaya gaya hai mere liye,
Kafia
Kabhi kabhi mere dil main khayal aata hai,
yeh Maths ka paper kyun har saal ata hai
---
5) Sanwali si ek ladki,
dhadkan jaise dil ki,
dekhe jis ke woh sapne,
kahin woh main to nahi!!
Kafia
Moti se ek ladki,
kamar jaise bhens ki,
dekhe jis ke woh sapne,
kahin woh main to nahi (Are baap re)
---
6) Tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi,
tere bina zinagi bhi lekin, zindagi to nahi,
Kafia
Tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi,
tere bina ladkion ki kami bhi, to nahi (Bahaut hain jan00)
---
7) Aa bhi ja , Aa bhi ja,
Ae subha aa bhi ja,
Rat ko kar wida,
Dil ruba aa bhi ja.
Kafia
Aa bhi ja, Aa bhi ja,
Date pe aa bhi ja,
Doosre BFs ko kar wida,
jan00 aa bhi ja (Aati hai ke nahi)
---
8) Natu ae gi na hi chen aaye ga,
mere angan ki hari belon ka ab patta patta sookhta jae ga.
Kafia
Na tu ae gi , Na hi chen ae ga,
mere Server ke mehenge hours ka ab rupiya rupiya doobta jae ga (Online ho
ja ab)
---
9) Aap ke pyar main hum sanwarne lage,
dekh ke aap ko hum nikharne lage,
is qadar aap se mohabbat hui,
toot ke bazuon main bikharne lage.
Kafia
Aap ke pyar main hum Bigadne lage,
Dekh ke aap ko hum bhi cigarette, peene lage,
Is qadar aap se hum ko mohabbat hui,
apne abba se roz ladke lage
---
10) Hum kyun chalen us rah par ,
jis rah par sab hi chalen,
kyun na chunen woh rasta,
jis par nahi koi gaya.
Kafia
Hum kyun chalen us jagah par,
jis jaga par cheezien mehengi milen,
kyun na jaeen aisi jaga,
jahan bache apna ruipya.
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panoo me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo zara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka pc kiya hai chaaloo
Apne dil ke hard disk pe aur kitani files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hai jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhate hai
Warna aap jaise softwares to bazaar main bikte hai
Roz raat aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ka mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko lubhataa hai
Par bicch main tere baap ka virus aa jataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ke site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apne insult ka badalaa dekho kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko shift delete kar doonga
Aapke ke nakhare apne dil pe bang ho gaye
Do pc joodte joodte hang ho gaye
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le jalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
.
---
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
---
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
---
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
---
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
---
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
jo sadiyaon se hota aaya hai
woh repeat kar doonga
tu naa mili to tujhko dil sey
Ctrl+Alt+delete kar doonga
---
company kee ladkiyaan sunder hain
aur lonely hain
problem ye hai ki bus voh
read only hain
---
shayad mere pyar ko taste
karna bhool gaye
dil sey aisa cut kiya
ke paste karna bhool gaye
---
woh samajhte hain dil tod diya
to hum dead hain
woh nahin jaante ki is dil main
aur kitne thread hain
---
tumhare samne hain itney item
kabhi hamein bhi pick karo
hamare pyar ke icon pe
kabhi to tum double click karo
---
roz subha hum karte hai
itne pyar se unhe good morning
woh humhe ghoor kar dekhte hain
jaise 0 error but 5 warning
---
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
---
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
---
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
I am a girl, why not a boy? I play with books and study about toys. I fly on the earth and walk in the sky. Yesterday night,I
saw a sun. In the morning,I ate a gun. I am beautiful but seems ugly, all my friends call me lovely. My friend's name is
Bina, I call her Tina. I know English but in Urdu, I met a Christian but he was a Hindu.
---
Ajj anwer dafattan khayal aya hai us murgh ka shorrba piiney key bad aur bootian khaney key bad allah allah ek berqi sard
khaney key tufail us ney kitni umer pai zibah hu janey key baad
---
Kuch aisa kar duniya mein kadardaan meherbaan jis gali sey guzrey awaz aaye abba jaan abba jan
---
Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaeen gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaeen gay
Teray husn ki kia taareef karoo?tera bander jaisa mu
Teri zulfo ki kia tareef karoo?teray ek ek baal pe joon
Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain
Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo,tum ko sawab ho ga
---
Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Jalti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jiyen gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.
---
Ghar se roz jata hai wo, Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap, Sab ko hi satata hai wo
Hathi nay kaha ja kar hathni ki kabar per
Sadqay jaoo tumhari patli kamar per
Tum bhi becahara,hum bhi becahara
Fittay mu tumhara,fittay mu hamara
Hum nay usay dekha angle badal kar
Us nay hamay mara sandle badal kar
Dil kay armaa aanso'oo may bah gaye
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kah gaye
Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar
Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh
Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen
Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya
Un ki gali say guzray,ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha
Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalaak hai,mangi thallay war jaeen gay
Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi
Mera dil para hai loose Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes
"Sahib Zaday kiya karte hain" Larki Waloon ne poocha
"Jab dekho farigh phirte hain ya tambako pite hain"
Larkay ki amman yeh bolin....kam kare us ki joti
"do bhai bhatta lete hain--abba khair se daku hain"
nakam muhabbat ka har eik dukh sehna..
.har haal main anjam se darte rehna
Qudrat ka barra anjam hai jaidi........
mehbooba ki olad ka "mamoon" kehna!
---
Rab na dikhaye
Tooba Tooba!
nanga pinda
nanga sina
bara kam33na
Dish Antena
---
Ishq main fanni kharabi...........Munqata hi ho geya saab silsila
Is tarha toota hai un se wasta....jis tarha T.V main toote rabta
---
Rat ka waqt hai or masjid hai qareeb
uthiye jaldi se ke peghame amal laya hoon
ghar main hain filhal jitne bhi purane jote
aap bhi jake badal lain main badal aya hoon
or bhi chizain lut chuki hain dil ke sath
yeh batayen doston ne ishq farmane ke baad
is liye kamre ki eik eik chiz check karta hoon main
" eik tere ane se pehle eik tere jane ke baad"
bhains rakhne ka takalluf hamse ho sakta nahin
ham ne sokhe doodh ka dabba jo hai rakha hua
ghar main rakhain ghair mehrm ko mulazim kis liye
kam karne ke liye abba jo hai rakha hua
---
Utha kar phool ki patti, nazaakat se masal daali
Ishaarey se kaha Hum dil "Aisa" haal kartey hain
dil karta hai keh uss kay nazook hontoon koo chuum loonnnnn
magar uss kee behteee hooyee naak nay meraa iradaa hee badal diyaaa
chandni chand se hogi to sitaroon ka kiya ho ga
mohabbat eik se hogi to hazaroon ga kiya ho ga
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka computer kiya hai chaaloo
Aab main dil ki hard disk pe aur kitni files daaloo
Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao
Woh to hum hain jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhte hain
Warna aap jaise kitney hi softwares bazaar main bikte hain
Roz raat ko aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ko mouse bana ke ungaliyon pe nachaate ho
Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko Lubhataa hai
Par beech main tere baap ka virus aataa hai
Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intezaar
Hamaare dil ki site pe kabhi enter to maro yaar
Apni insult ka badalaa dekhna main kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko Shift Delete kar doonga
Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut ker diya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai
Aapka hasnaa aap ka chalnaa aap ki woh style
Aapke adaaon ki hamne save hai kar li file
---
Apple kat ta hoon knife se,
Paani peeta hoon pipe se,
Kya zamana aaa gaya,
Joote khata hoon wife se
Gul gaya, Gulshan gaya, Gaye honthon ki laaali
Ab to peeecha chor de, main ho gaye bachchon waali
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon
---
Toot Jaate Hain Sabhi Rishte Magar
Dil Se Dil Ka Rishta Apni Jagah
Dil Ko Hai Tujh Se Na Milne Ka Yaqeen
Tujh Se Milne Ki Dua Apni Jagah
Mast Nazron se dekh lenaa tha..
Agar tamanna thi Aazmane ki..
Hum to Behosh Yun hi ho jaate..
Kya zaroorat thi muskurane ki..
Chehrey Per Banawat Ka Gussa,
Aankhon Say Chalakta Pyar Bhi Hai,
Is Shauq-E-Ada Ko Kya Kahiye
Inkar Bhi Hai Iqraar Bhi Hai.
---
Raat bhar jaagi ho jiske sapno mein,
kaise kho gaya wo raat ke andhero mein,
Dhoondti rahi tum mujhe, dil ke kisi kone mein
main bas raha hoon, tumhari dhadkano mein, tumhari saanso mein
Main chup hi sahi, magar magroor nahin
Ek khamoshi hi sahi magar, koi shikwa nahin
Na tumse koi shikwa hai jaanam, na koi naraazgi
ye dil ka lagana hai jaanam, nahin koi dil lagi.....!!!
---
Sapna to bas sapna hai,
Sapno mein keya jeena,
Subha ki phali kiran sai seekho,
Is jeevan ko jeena.
Dil kai kone ko chordo,
hansti duniya mein aao,
kisi ko man ka meet banalo,
khushion kai phool khilao.
chupai huai magroor ko chordo,
chordo shkway narazee ko,
tord do pinjra - urd kar dhundo,
apnay jeewan sathi ko.
---
Na dekha karo tum humein, teerchhi nazaron se is tarah
ke jaan jaati hai jism se, neend aankhon se jis tarah
Aaankhein hai ye tumhari, ya shab e maikhana
main hosh jo kho doon, mujhe hosh mein na lana
Dekha jo tumne pyar se, wafa ka izhaar hua
paya jo tumhein zindgi mein, mohabbat ka ikraar hua
Khoya jo tumhein, ik aah nikli is dil se
dil ko jala gayi, ik bijli is dil se
Ab na aao khwaabon mein tum, kahin neend se na jagoon
main zinda hi kab tha, kahin maut se na jagoon.....!!
---
Zindgi mein to tumhari aa na sake, ab khwaabon mein chale aate hain
Tum laakh nazrein pher lo sanam, hum phir bhi chale aate hain
Kahne ko to tum bhul chuki thi, phir bhi anjaane mein pukarti ho
Tum kabhi bhuli nahin thi, sirf jaankar anjaane mein pukarti ho
Mann to mann hai, mann ko kya kahena
hum aayenge sapno mein, sapno ko kya kahena
---
Yaad rahe jaati hai, aur waqt guzar jata hai
Phool khilta hai aur khil ke bikhar jata hai,
Phool se kya gila, jab phool mein khushboo nahin
Apno se kya gila, jab apno mein mohabbat nahin,
Mohabbat na sahi, hum phir bhi jee lete hain
Zindgi zaher hi sahi, hum phir bhi pee lete hain....
---
bandagi hai khuda ki, khuda ka hai noor
heeron mein yeh heera hai, nooron mein kohinoor
kitno ko katl kiya isne, kitno ko kiya majboor
dilwlaon ka hai aasra, jab voh hote hain door
judai mein dilbar ki, yeh ban jaati hai nasoor
Kaise bataun mein kya chiz mohabbat hoti hai
pooncho yeh usse, jisko mohabbat hoti hai
---
Chappal chhoti ho to
Panw me nahi aati
Biwi moti ho to
Bahon me nahi aati
---
A kalam rukja
Izzat ka mukam hai
Tere nuk pe mere
Mehbub ka naam hai
---
O shayeri sunne walo jara
Gor se suno
Age ka nahi aata
Kisi aur se suno
---
Tairna hai to samunder me aake tairo
Kinaron me kya rakha hai
Agar pyar karana hai to bahome aake karo
Isharon me kya rakha hai
---
Jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
Jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
Dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le zalim
Bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
TERI JULF HAI YA ANDHERI RAAT KA SAAYA
SAR MUNDWA LE TO SAVERA HO JAI.
Kaaash ke tere chehre par Chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chickenpox ke daag hote.....
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saaath hote
ladka bola :
kash ein hasinao ke baap mar jate,
bahana gam ka hota, hum inke ghar to jaate.
Ladki boli:
Bewkoof, Yeh bolana bhi paap hoga,
kisi din tu bhi kisi hasina ka baap hoga.
Ladki boli:
Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi,
Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi.
Ladka bola :
Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga,
Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to h! azaron ka kya hoga.
---
"Teri zulphein hai ya Ghana Andhera.....................
..................JAANEMAN katwa de baal ...... Hoja ganji...........Aur.............Karde savera"
"JUICE peene ka mazza cup mein nahin ........GLass mein hota hai
GREEting card dene ka mazza GHARwali ko nahin SAALi ko hota hai"
Wo larayeee hi kya JISME DO CHAAR Gaaliyan na ho .....
ARE Wo SASURAAL HI kya jahan koi Saali na ho!!
---
Something to take you to Flash back - Inspired by Jagit Singh
yeh degree bhi lelo ye naukari bhi lelo
Bhale Chheen lo mujhse US ka Visa
magar mujhko lauta do college ki canteen
vo kam chaay ka pani vo teeKha samosaa
college ki canteen me hum sab the raja,
vo chaayvaalaa jise saare kehte the Khawja
vo Kahwja ke hathon ki 'bi2' chaay meethee
vo chupkese journal mein bheji hui chitthi
vo padhtehi chiththi uska tilmilaanaa
vo chehre ki laali vo aankhon ka gussaa...
kadi dhoop mein apne ghar se nikalnaa
vo project ki Khatir shahar bhar bhataknaa
vo lecture mein doston ki proxy lagaanaa
vo sar ko chidhanaa ,vo aeroplane udaanaa
vo submission ki raton ko jagnaa jagaanaa
vo orals ki khahani vo Lab-on ka kissaa....
bimaari ka detention ke time bahanaa
vo doosron ke assignments ko apnaa banaanaa
vo seminar ke din pairoka chhatpatanaa
vo workshop mein din raat pasinaa bahanaa
vo exam ke din ka bechain maahaul
par vo maa ka vishvas Teachar ka Bharosaa
colleg ki wo lambisi raatein
vo doston se thele pe pyaari si baatein
vo gathering ke din ka ladnaa Jhagadnaa
vo ladkiyon ka yuhin hamesha akadnaa
bhulaaye nahin bhool sakta hai koi
jivan ka ek atoot hissaa...
vo college ki yaaden, vo college ke din
koi to louta de mere college ke din........
---
Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't likeyour face
Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se, ho jaata hai server down
Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection, time out ho gaya
Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
What is your ICQ number, aao karein chat
Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na e-Mail
Main tumhein pyaar kyun karoon, tum nahi ho Ash,
Phir bhi tumhe dekh kar mera, system hota hai crash
---
chand ko sitoron se or mujhe tum se mohabbet hai
phoolon ko baharon se or mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
mefil main jo milna nighahen jhukalena
koi samajh na pai ke mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
ab tere hijr main bus ek kaam hai asman takna
tum sitaron pe likh dena mujhe tum se mohabbat
hai hamain ehsas hai tum ko bhi ham se pyaar hai lekin
yeh mere roohbarooh kehna mujhe tum se mohabbat hai
---
UFF YE BEWIYA........! ( ZUBAN PER KIYA HAI? )
DIL MAY KIYA HAI?
AAJ APP JALDI GHAR AA GAYE? ... .........BAHER KISSE NE GHASS NAHIN DALI HO GI.
GARAMA GARAM CHAYE TAYER HAI............ KASH! TUJE SUGER HO JAYE... Manhoos kabhi to Na ker diya ker !
MAY APP KA PANOO DABA DOON. ------- KASH! TUMHRE GARDAN DABA Sakhti .. Haan Tarey Baap Ki Nouker Hoon Na ?
TUM SAMRAT,BEAUTIFUL HO. YA ALLAH! JOOT BOOLNE PER MUJE MAAF FARMA Kanjoos Ab To Shoping Kera Day
ZARA MUNE KO CHOOP KARA DIJEA APNE HI GHALTE KI SAZYA
BHUKTOO
.
INSURANCE KI FEES JAMA KARWA DE TUMHRE BAD KOI TU SHARA HO.
AAJ APP KIYA KHANA PASSANT KARNE GA JOOTE,BELAN,YA........!
AB APP AARAM FARMA LEJEA. TUJH KO MOUT KYUN NAHI AA JATI ??
NO OFFENSE GIRLS....
Abay Bahi Kiya Soch Rah hei ??? Ye KOi Dup chaal Nahi hei Balkey Haqeqat hei
---
Somthing About Nowadays
GIRLS & BOYS
~ Ager larkiyan perda karein jesa k humaarey deen main hai to na koi lerka unko tang karey ga,, na woh unko buri nazer sai
dekh ker ghalat harkaton mein parega,, aur awaargee khatam na sahee per average kam ho jaye gee..
~ Boys u should also limit urself.. and concentrate on your studies n making the future.. of urs.... ur parents and of ur
comming family..
~ Na love hoooga.
~ love nahi hooga to kisi k dil tootnay ka sabab bhi nahi banay ga.
~ Aaj kal ager 100 couples love kartey hain to un mein mushkil sai 10% shaadi kartey hain,,, aur un 10% main sai 6% log esay
hain k jin ki shaadi k baad jhagra shuru hoo jata hai aur baat divorce tak pohonch jaati hai
~ Ab bachay 4%...
~ 4 % main sai 2% esay hain jo khud to shaadi karlay tey hain but maa baap sai door hoo kar........... zindagee guzaartey
hain
~ Ab bachay 2%...
~ 2% hi log shayad esay hootey hain k jo khushnaseeb hoo woh bhi pata nahi kisi ki dua lag gai hoo.. to
~ kabhi hisaab lagaanay betho to yehi hisaab niklay ga.
~ Ab aap khud soocho k sirf ek ghalt faislay ki wajha sai kitnay ghar barbaad hoote hain, kitnay log zindagi k sakoon sai
mehroom reh jaatey hain.
~ Darasal hoota yeh hai k Allah Ta'la aasmaan per hi humarey jorey banata hai hum kuch bhi karlein humara life partner wohi
banta hai jisko Allah nay humarey liye chuna hai. Agar hum sahi hain, sachay hain, hum main koi khot nahi aur hum sahi
raastey per chal kar apnay life partner ko hasil karna chahtey hain to hum ko hamara partner wesa ban kar milay ga / gi jesay
hum khud hain.. Agar hum burey hain, jhootey hain aur ghalat raastey(bf ya gf bana kar) per chal kar apnay life partner ko
hasil karna chahtey hain to woh bhi hum ko ghalat ban kar milay ga woh bhi wesa hi hooga jesay aap khud hain.
~ Agar hum boyfriends aur girlfriends banaaye gay to humko bazahir aur ibteda main to bohat maza aaye ga lekin woh maza
mukhtasar hooga, jhoota hooga aur shuru shuru ka ....
~ To be very much realistic the average of success in love is 8% in the world.. isnt that enough for u to b aware...???
~ Jo life patner humein milna hay wo to humein mil hee jayga/jayegi.. to phir aap kiun apnay aap ko aur jo relative hein un
ko mushikil mein daalein...
~ These r my views May be i m wrong ....
~ Ab dekhna yeh hai k main right hoo ya wrong aur yeh mujhe aap log bataaye gay ......
~ So friends!!!!! forward this mail to your friends and mail me and tell me........ am i right or wrong?
---
BAcha : Abbu mujhay Bender la ker dien.
Abbu : nahi Baita mein app ko Bander nahin la ker de sukta.
BAcha : nahi abbu mujhay bander chahyiey.
Abbu : baita kaha hai na nahi la sukta bander.
BuAcha : nahi abbu app bander laien.
Abbu : abb mein tumhein marooon ga ager abb tum nay kaha bander lanay ko.
BAcha : .......
Abbu : ro keun rahay ho????
BAcha : app mujhay bander jo nahi laker dey rahay hain
Abbu : Baita Bander nahi la suktey na.
BAcha : keun abbu
Abbu : hai na aik musla.
BAcha : batien na abbu kia musla hai.
Abbu : Baita musla yeh hai kay Bander is waqt yeh email parhnay mien busy hai........
hahahahahahahahahhhahahHAHHAHAHhahahahhah.........
---
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